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Hosting parties - bloomin' hard work or great fun....

(28 Posts)
DollyDa Mon 06-Jun-16 15:50:29

So we had a party this weekend, first big one we've had - big BBQ out in the garden, over 50+ guests, friends, family etc. Dh and I spent two days totally cleaning house and sorting the garden, prepared all food etc, people came, everyone raved what a wonderful time they had and they left again. At the actual party I ran around so much I barely spoke to anyone, didn't eat anything and managed to grab one drink, then spent the whole evening and most of today clearing up and sorting... I am really pleased everyone had a great time, but I am exhausted... I'm obviously a novice at this sort of thing as I see others handle it all with such effortless grace - where have I gone wrong?!

whois Mon 06-Jun-16 16:01:18

They are both!

When it is your party you take your enjoyment fro meveyrone else having fun I think. I always feel like I didn;t get to speak to anyone and just in a blurr all the time.

Helps if you have famillier friends who will dig about in your cupbards finding some more tonic water, or topping up peopels glasses etc.

MaureenMLove Mon 06-Jun-16 16:09:35

I love hosting parties! I love the organisation before hand, I love thinking of all the food I can do and sadly, I love the clearing up too! grin

The trick is, to have food that can be precooked and just leave it out for everyone, then you get to enjoy it too. When DH does the BBQ, he cooks everything, then just leaves it in a warm oven until it's all done, then BBQ goes off and everyone digs in. Big coolers for drinks in the garden and a table for bottles and plastic glasses. Job done!

My house (and us) are very party friendly and we love entertaining. Usually I have far too much of a good time and most of my friends have video of me singing or dancing, to hold me to ransom! grin.

I want to organise a function now!

Sparkletastic Mon 06-Jun-16 16:17:22

Definitely both. Secret is having all food done in advance and pitchers of cocktails made up / big ice baths for wine, beer and soft drinks. Decent quality disposable plates and cutlery. Get helpful person to circulate with bin bags at later stage to clear worst of detritus.

IABVU Mon 06-Jun-16 16:18:21

Too busy worrying that something will get broken, damaged or stained.

Get someone else to host, nose through their belongings, eat their food, drink their wine, block their toilet.

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 06-Jun-16 16:18:28

Both. You've got to love it to do it!

pearlylum Mon 06-Jun-16 16:19:06

Sounds a nightmare.
Did you enjoy it?

I hate going to parties and I wouldn't host one. OH and I do entertain, but usually no more than 6 or 7 guests, and it usually involves a meal.

badabadabadabwee Mon 06-Jun-16 16:19:22

I love it! I love planning the menu, shopping, choosing what drinks to serve, getting the ambiance just right, choosing the music.... love it!!

treaclesoda Mon 06-Jun-16 16:23:19

I have never hosted a party and don't think I ever will. The thought of it terrifies me.

I would love to be the sort of person who could host a party but...I'm not. blush

DollyDa Mon 06-Jun-16 16:24:50

I did enjoy it, I loved seeing everyone having so much fun and loved the compliments but did think 'gosh there must be an easier way of doing this!' We moved at the end of last year to a house which is much more open to entertaining, and it is a lovely way to see people. Sounds like I need more practice! It was a lot of the little things hat I forgot to sort beforehand so then had to sort afterwards - I should make a list for next time!

StrawberryQuik Mon 06-Jun-16 16:56:30

It's both, but more towards the enjoyable end for me smile I like cooking and hosting and feel it's one of the things I'm good at. I'm a bit sad atm because i wanted to throw a lovely big party for DS's baptism but I'm going to have to limit numbers to pretty much relatives and god parents due to money/space.

thebear1 Mon 06-Jun-16 17:37:09

Hate hosting parties, had 12 people at my wedding simply because I get stressed when I feel responseable for the enjoyment of others. Even kids parties cause me anxiety if I am the host.

pearlylum Mon 06-Jun-16 18:35:20

It's not the hosting that I dislike, it's all the small talk, it's all a bit banal and superficial if 50 people are all together.
OH and I love cooking and have several small events, but usually just 4 guests or so,.
I much prefer some meaty conversation than all the flim flam.

DollyDa Mon 06-Jun-16 18:47:19

Pearlylum - that's exactly the sort of thing we do FAR more of. I love having friends over for dinner, love cooking, preparing, enjoying and catching up. Now that type of hosting is definately more my thing!

cozietoesie Mon 06-Jun-16 18:52:58

I suspect that many people host large parties mainly to dispose of social obligations in one fell swoop - what they really enjoy is going to those held by other people.

Laiste Mon 06-Jun-16 18:59:44

I've never hosted for more than 20 and that was enough! I do xmas for the whole family every year, all day, big sit down meal + drinks and nibbles which can run into between 10 and 15 people.

I find it hard work, and enjoy the peace when everyone's gone - huge sigh of relief - but it is nice to see everyone together and getting on.

I kind of prefer to have 5 or 6 at a time. Then you get to actually enjoy the company too. MIL has form for constantly inviting everyone at once and she never gets a minute to talk to anyone.

IJustLostTheGame Mon 06-Jun-16 19:05:56

Hate them.
DH invites everyone and I have to do every thing.
He seems to think they are easy, they are to him.
The last time he invited his parents, they stood in the way in the kitchen and looked for things to disapprove over. I retreated to the shed with a bottle of wine and smoked fags with my best mate after dd went to bed leaving DH to it.

WhatamessIgotinto Mon 06-Jun-16 19:06:34

Both! I LOVE it! The key is to keep it simple and prepare as much as you can in advance. I want to have a party now!

pearlylum Mon 06-Jun-16 19:10:07

* I retreated to the shed with a bottle of wine and smoked fags with my best mate*

As would I!! It defeats the point of having a party though- that's why I wouldn't have one.

You could have your friend over any weekend and drink wine in the shed, and not bother with the party.

Roussette Mon 06-Jun-16 19:10:29

I love hosting parties, always have done even before I was married. Last one I did was 60 people, I do plan and organise a lot in advance. At least 3 months lead up to it. I enjoy my own parties soooo much because by the time everyone arrives everything is done and if it isn't.... well... sod it! A couple of drinks down my neck and I just don't care!

I just make sure there's plenty of drink, lots of food to soak it up with, music (had live music last time, it was such such fun) and I hate it when people start to leave and want to stop the clock. The best thing with doing your own party is... you can do exactly waht you want, I love music so what I have is to my and DH's taste (and my parties can't be too bad because everyone comes again!)

Lumpylumperson Mon 06-Jun-16 19:11:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Roussette Mon 06-Jun-16 19:15:32

Yes agree on the paper plates, we do too, CBA to wash 60 plates! Also ditto on "here is your first drink, help yourself after that" although because we had so many last time, and it was a bit busy, someone who works at the local pub who I paid came and walked round with bottles and topped up everyone's glasses and filled beer from the barrel etc. It was soooo much easier and if I have a big one again, I'll do that.

CakeNinja Mon 06-Jun-16 19:17:17

Both! But generally, the fun should be what sticks in your mind at the end.
We have a house well suited to hosting (because we have made adaptations) and we both love having people round. Every summer we host a big BBQ, around 60 people, adults and children. Prep is done in the lead up and clearing up is done a bit along the way, couple of trips round with a bin bag every few hours, dishwasher loaded up and put on as and when during the day/evening. There are usually a couple of people happy to lend a hand for 5 minutes to either go round binning things or loading up the dishwasher.
We get the front room ready with tv/films/duvets and the kids do popcorn and treats.
Adults sometimes retire to the shed and get involved in pool/darts, it's like a summer house really with a toilet and a beer fridge!
We all look forward to it really. It's hard work in that there's a lot of prep work but really, as long as you have plenty of food, booze and soft drinks, everyone's happy.

We do a lot of smaller things throughout the year too, it does help that dp always does the cooking so not everything is left to me.

sharknad0 Mon 06-Jun-16 19:19:54

Love them, but it's practice. More than 50 guests on your first party is quite amazing frankly!

Nowadays, I don't do a spring clean before a party. House is in a reasonable condition, and that's normally enough. I cheat and only use paper towels, plates and glasses, and even some disposable serving bowls and plates. That way, much less cleaning involved.

The most time consuming thing is the clearing up after cooking! I try to freeze as much as possible so I can start preparing the food a couple of weeks in advance. On the day, we only need to make the salads and things like that, and cook the meat.

If you only have friends and family, you can be quite relax. it's people who like you, so the whole point is to spend a great day together.

Trills Mon 06-Jun-16 20:03:32

I enjoy it, but I enjoy it like "a hard thing that is worth it" more than like " a thing that is both pleasant and easy".

I make sure that I get more than one drink though!

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