DD is 10 years old and wants to go into town wearing make-up - aibu?

[Evelynne]

I have been kind of railroaded into allowing DD (10) into town with her two friends. We live in a city.

The mother of one of the girls approached me in front of both girls and asked whether DD could meet them in town this weekend. I didn't want to embarrass DD so I said I would think about it.

The mother then asked whether DD could go on a 4 hour shopping trip with the girls. I was unhappy with this and said I'd be ok with an hour, providing DD had a mobile and I was in town too....

DD has just told me that the girls wear make-up into town (DD doesn't make things like this up) and I am really regretting saying it's ok. I don't want my 10 year old alone in town with other 10 year olds wearing make up, it just makes me feel uncomfortable. I wouldn't be bothered if they were 13/14 but I do feel 10 is too young.

AIBU?

[Buggers]

Depends what make up she wants to wear.

[beeny]

No 10 is far too young.

[NeedACleverNN]

No chance.

I wouldn't allow my 10 year old to wear make up

[FeckinCrutches]

It would be a no from me, and I'm pretty slack.

[WanderingTrolley1]

Yanbu.

[Evelynne]

What about the town part? If she wasn't wearing make-up and they were?

[FeckinCrutches]

I still wouldn't be keen on mine being in town by themselves at that age either. Are you going to be there? And not for four hours!

[Evelynne]

She's in year 6 and starting secondary school in september. A lot of the other girls do go into town so I felt perhaps I was being unreasonable for saying no....

They are meant to be going in 2 hours time...

[hewl]

No. I would let dd go to another shop alone with a friend for about 20 mins.

[I8toys]

No too young

[hewl]

In year 6 I'd let them wander for 40 mins or so while I was also in town, I'd arrange to meet in Costa.

[MadameDePomPom]

Far too young imo.

[Chippednailvarnishing]

So at 4.30pm they are going out for a 4 hour shopping trip? Unless your not in the UK, and it's now early morning in your timezone why are you allowing this?

I frankly don't understand why you can't say no.

[FeckinCrutches]

Ok I was letting my 11yo in year 6 go into town for an hour or two, then I'd meet her for lunch.

[TondelayaDellaVentamiglia]

does she have any idea of how to get there, or home, or catch a bus, read a bus timetable, even get about town on her own....I have to concentrate in department stores...you can get really lost, come out on the wrong street

unless she is pretty confident then I'd not let her do all that solo. And makeup...a slick of lip gloss and maybe a shimmy of mascara and not an iota more!

If she is going to be a young high school pupil after the summer then it's time to consider more independence for sure, but this is a bit in at the deep end.

[sidsgranny]

So they aren't going till 4.30 and want to be out till 8.30?

I'd certainly be saying no.

[FeckinCrutches]

I suppose it depends on the city as well and how well she knows it.

[RitchyBestingFace]

YANBU about the make up, YABbitU about meeting in town. Maybe not four hours but I don't understand why you were uncomfortable with the idea from the off...before you knew about the duration /make up 'rule'

[Evelynne]

No, going for an hour

[MrsLion]

Too young. Personally I wouldn't be happy about 10 yr olds being in town with no adults, or the make up.

[Evelynne]

I would take her in and stay in town too.

[HermioneJeanGranger]

I went into town with friends from year 6, so aged 10/11, but not for four hours at a time with no adults.

I used to walk into town (five minutes away from home) with a friend for a couple of hours, and then someone's mum would meet us in Costa/Starbucks for a muffin/hot chocolate and we'd go home. Or, we'd do the hot chocolate bit first and walk home a couple of hours later.

I wouldn't have been allowed to wear make-up at that age, though, although I don't see the difference it makes to the town decision.

[00100001]

Isn't the mum going with them?

[Chippednailvarnishing]

This is like one long dripfeed. So you're actually going with her? So what's the problem, say no to the make up and go.

[dearlybeloved]

I would be OK with a bit of make up(blusher light lipgloss ) no harm. I wouldn' t be OK with them alone in a city for 4 hours. My dd 10 goes around our small very familiar town with her older sister 15 for a few hours but I wouldn't allow her to go with peers just yet.