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To support DD 17 who wants a breast reduction?

(95 Posts)
MumOfSadDD Sat 04-Jun-16 11:29:18

DD is 17, nearly 18. For years now she's been talking about wanting a breast reduction, I put this down to teen low self esteem, thinking she would get over it.

I don't see her naked very often because she feels so self conscious but we're on holiday now. Yesterday we were talking about it and she showed me what she was talking about.

We're due to go for a proper bra fitting when we get home, her last one 18 months ago measured her as a 36G and she's much bigger than that now.

Not only that, it's the shape of her breasts that's the problem, I don't want this thread to attract trolls and voyeurs so I will just say that they need uplifting.

My poor, poor girl. When I saw them I immediately understood.

Her BMI is 27, we have discussed ways to reduce this before she can have an op but she can't run or do any exercise that causes bounce, even with a good sports bra it's painful.

They are also causing back pain and bad posture.

Any advice/opinions/experiences would be appreciated.

As DD asked me to start this thread I have name changed so she can see your replies.

EatShitDerek Sat 04-Jun-16 11:31:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bearleftmonkeyright Sat 04-Jun-16 11:32:04

There's nothing unreasonable about this. Plenty of women have breast reductions to improve their quality of life.

AnotherTimeMaybe Sat 04-Jun-16 11:33:08

Yes you should, why wouldn't you?

RaeSkywalker Sat 04-Jun-16 11:34:29

Absolutely, you should support her.

NicknameUsed Sat 04-Jun-16 11:34:40

Perhaps, in the meantime she might benefit from a more supportive bra in the correct size. She might need the, by now, famous MN bra intervention.

What size is she clothes-wise?

Lurkedforever1 Sat 04-Jun-16 11:36:41

Yanbu. You're absolutely doing the right thing to support her.

megletthesecond Sat 04-Jun-16 11:37:53

Yanbu. Especially if they're restricting what activities she can do.

monkeyfacegrace Sat 04-Jun-16 11:38:17

I had a reduction and uplift when I was 19. Best 7k I ever spent, changed my life.

Get on and get it booked. If you can afford it I can't think of a reason not to.

AnguaResurgam Sat 04-Jun-16 11:39:10

At this age, she may find it difficult to find someone prepared to carry out an operation. It is usually left until puberty is totally completed (meaning all the indicators which tends to mean early 20s, not just main growth spurt).

Until then, a good bra will make a huge difference.

I hope the fitting goes well.

I had a Panache sports bra in 36G and not a jiggle. The Enell is more expensive and as good if not better.

Witchend Sat 04-Jun-16 11:40:45

Please do look into it. A friend who was similar said it changed her life.

Angelto5 Sat 04-Jun-16 11:40:51

Was wondering if swimming would be a good thing to help her with exercise?

Morasssassafras Sat 04-Jun-16 11:43:41

Out of interest did you go to one of the better shops to have her measured (bravissimo, John Lewis etc) or to m&s? I ask purely because my bmi is hugely bigger than hers (ie obese) but I'm a 36J and so I'm wondering if she is actually in the right size bra, and if she isn't then that might help.

I may just have been one of the lucky ones but I've never suffered back pain from them but have always worn a properly fitted bra. And I use the elliptical at the gym in a normal bra and I'm fine with no bounce so thats definitely a good way to lose weight.

If the bra is properly fitted then yanbu to support her in a reduction.

ReggaeShark Sat 04-Jun-16 11:45:14

I would absolutely support my DD in this situation. Initially that would mean getting good bras and good information. Was also thinking 17 may be too young but advice from GP and good plastic surgeons will confirm either way. Good luck to her.

ChitChatarunga Sat 04-Jun-16 11:45:36

I'd support her too.

brew

MumOfSadDD Sat 04-Jun-16 11:47:46

It's an AIBU because she is young and she probably wouldn't be able to breastfeed afterwards and she says she does want children one day. Any surgery has risks associated with it.

Swimming is a great idea but she's so self conscious that she doesn't want to get into a costume and get into the water.

She's a size 10 bottom half and a 16 top half.

We did the bra intervention 18 months ago and we're going again when we're back from holiday.

Dontneedausername Sat 04-Jun-16 11:49:45

My friend (now 35) has had 2 breast reductions, one at 20, one at 30 and is BFing her son right now smile

PacificDogwod Sat 04-Jun-16 11:51:28

Of course support her.

But - I'd seriously counsel to defer any surgery until after she is 20 or so as breast can continue developing and surgery too early can not be as successful as it would be otherwise.

Also have a look at this site or let her have a look. It shows non-sexualised images of normal breasts.
Breast reduction surgery is quite a big undertaking and recovery is much longer than after breast augmentation. She will need to wear a very supportive (sports-) bra for several months, sensation can be affected, there's a risk to circulation to the nipple etc etc.

It would be a good first step to speak in depth with a reputable plastic surgeon, somebody who is not going to 'push' surgery. I'd avoid placed like Transform for the initial advice.

Academic article about Juvenile breast hypertrophy

And YY to a proper bra-fitting in the meantime. Bravissimo changed my life smile

Also re weight loss: there's no doubt that losing weight to a health BMI will reduce her breast size also - well worth-while tackling. Not being overweight will also reduce her surgery risks and recovery.

KayTee87 Sat 04-Jun-16 11:52:00

Definitely support her, pre pregnancy I'm a 32GG and it is horrible sad I'd love them to be smaller. God knows what they'll be like after this baby and breastfeeding. Once I've finished my family I think I will be looking into one.

monkeyfacegrace Sat 04-Jun-16 11:52:36

Breastfeeding isnt an issue. Most people can still feed afterwards, but I chose not to and FF 3 very robust healthy little people.

And I had no pain in my back, I had it done because I looked gross. I too was a 10 bottom half and 16 top half. I have no problem admitting it was all vanity and I'd have it done again in a heartbeat.

NCVanish Sat 04-Jun-16 11:55:52

Either support her through GP or private. And I second bravissimo for the best fitting, I can't buy from any chains with a J cup. They actually feel smaller now they're in proper fitting bras

MumOfSadDD Sat 04-Jun-16 11:58:32

Pacific as a family we are 'busty' and, again, without going into too much detail having seen hers are not 'right' I can't think of a better word and I don't want to describe

I think that the size of her breasts make a significant contribution to her BMI in themselves. Although we both agree we will tackle her weight.

I can't remember who asked but yes, it was a proper bra fitting and not an M&S job.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Sat 04-Jun-16 11:58:51

I had a breast reduction at 15 (I'm 47 now). Back then I was warned about breast feeding and it was difficult but surgery has improved now, I think.

I would really advise some good counselling for your daughter just to make sure that any underlying issues other than the size/weight of her breasts, are addressed in advance. I didn't haven't counselling and now as an adult, I wish I had.

Best wishes to your daughter, I understand what she's going through.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince Sat 04-Jun-16 11:58:55

Absolutely.

I had an NHS reduction from a K to a D. It has transformed my life. It was particularly hard at your daughters age because teenage boys were just obsessed.

One of the best things I have ever done. And a breast reduction has the highest satisfaction rate amongst all the plastic surgeries.

ColdCottage Sat 04-Jun-16 11:59:32

I think support her all the way, especially if she is fully aware of the breastfeeding implications and as her mother you believe she will cope with that later in life.
Also please go to bravissimo (M&S stores all over the uk measured me wrong!) I went from a 36C to a 32F. I currently wear a larger size after baby and BFing but hope to lose weight and get back to old size or smaller. Losing weight took me down to a 32D which I liked. As PP said the right bra will make a huge difference while she waits and will make her look an feel better.
If you can afford to buying a selection of pretty bras with good support will be a great interim help. I know even now I like a pretty bra but I was so into my undies (for myself) when I was her age. Makes you feel nice even if you have something boring on over the top.
If she is a size 10 bottoms it sounds like her breasts are impacting on her BMI. Does she have good posture? BA posture an also make your back hurt more.
I'd call the GPS and discuss with reception who would be the most sensitive GP to meet with her.

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