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to go on this Hen night even though DH will get the Arse?

(80 Posts)
Lertle Wed 01-Jun-16 18:01:57

One of my best friends is getting married in September and has invited me on her hen night at the end of August., it's a night out in Blackpool and we would be staying over the night in a hotel (we live about 100 miles away)

I just know DH will get the arse about it if I say I'm going, and if I don't go it will upset my friend

I don't know what to do for the best cos it's gonna piss someone off whatever i do so I can't win

I do actually want to go, I think it will be a laugh. and I hardly ever get to go out with 3 small dc

Abbinob Wed 01-Jun-16 18:03:26

Why would he get the arse?
you want to go and there's no good reason why you shouldn't (stoppy DH isn't a good reason- that's his problem) so go

deVelvet Wed 01-Jun-16 18:03:43

Why will he get the arse? Aren't you allowed to go out?

MrsSpecter Wed 01-Jun-16 18:03:45

What reason will he get the hump? What are his objections?

Lumpylumperson Wed 01-Jun-16 18:04:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DraenorQueen Wed 01-Jun-16 18:04:14

Why would he have a problem with you going?

acasualobserver Wed 01-Jun-16 18:04:22

I vote go and let him get the arse.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 01-Jun-16 18:04:27

Why would he get the arse?

Is it cost, trust issues from him or the fact he'll have to care for 3 small dc's?


Wolfiefan Wed 01-Jun-16 18:04:50

What reason has he got to get the arse?
Are you doing that instead of having a family holiday?
Are you away every weekend due to a hobby?
Does this friend hate him and slag him off every second?

Lordamighty Wed 01-Jun-16 18:05:00

If he is going to get the arse then all the more reason to go.

sooperdooper Wed 01-Jun-16 18:05:31

Does he have weekends away with his mates when he wants them? If so he can arse off smile

RaeSkywalker Wed 01-Jun-16 18:10:40

Why would he be unhappy?

AnyFucker Wed 01-Jun-16 18:10:48

What is his problem with you spending the night in Blackpool ?

I hate the place personally, but wouldn't get the arse if my husband went there.

Morasssassafras Wed 01-Jun-16 18:17:51

I reckon this will be a unanimous yanbu.

Go and have fun.

branofthemist Wed 01-Jun-16 18:17:51

If he gets the arse every time you do something....that's your problem. That's needs sorting

DixieNormas Wed 01-Jun-16 18:19:09

Let him get the arse

katemiddletonsnudeheels Wed 01-Jun-16 18:19:22

YABVU to go to Blackpool wink

On a serious note, without any other information your post is worrying, OP. Can you tell us a little more?

Lertle Wed 01-Jun-16 18:20:00

No trust issues at all

He doesn't dislike my friend other than she is a bit of a flirt (which she is but she'd never actually do anything) she is younger than me too. I think he just doesn't like the idea of me being 100 miles away with a group of other women plus he has been on a stag do to black pool and says it's quite dodgy at night. Although I'm a 36 year old woman, I think i can handle myself and I never drink to excess anyway. My plan is to go back to he hotel once I've had enough anyway.

He is never that keen on me going out, although he would never stop me I just get a vibe he doesn't like it much

Yet he goes out most weekends as he is a session musician (it's a second job) so he has gigs. But his argument is that he gets paid for them which is a fair point

And we can afford it, and still will be having a family holiday etc. And if he is gigging my parents would have the kids. So money / child care not an issue

Lertle Wed 01-Jun-16 18:20:23

Sorry I realise my op was a bit vague blush

Mavisblewitt Wed 01-Jun-16 18:20:34

for goodness sake woman, GO!

If he wants to be a childish twat about it, that's his choice. Seriously don't give in to this childish nonsense. It's a control thing.

I used to get this, but to be fair he never went out so expected me to stay home as well. Wasn't happening.

If he got a strop on I just let him get on with it and told him he was being childish.

lifes too short my lovely flowers

idontlikealdi Wed 01-Jun-16 18:22:16

Good god just go. Did you mind when he went on a stag do?

magoria Wed 01-Jun-16 18:22:39

I couldn't think of anything worse!


Why will he get the arse if you have a night out?

magoria Wed 01-Jun-16 18:23:16


Sod that he is not your jailor.


AnyFucker Wed 01-Jun-16 18:24:01

Hmm. He's been on a stag to Blackpool, eh ? Methinks he might be projecting.

And if you get the "vibe" he is "doesn't like it much" then I call sexism, controlling tendencies and double standards.

Don't tell me....he "trusts you but doesn't trust other men not to hit on you". Classic.

Wolfiefan Wed 01-Jun-16 18:26:40

He isn't keen on you going out?
Fuck that.
Go. Enjoy yourself. Give him the opportunity to get over himself.

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