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to think most 30 somethings have a good life

(84 Posts)
howiloveanicecupoftea Thu 26-May-16 11:50:03

I was talking to DP yesterday at how comfortable and lucky most 30 somethings lives seem to be these days. He said he didn't think that was the case at all but from what I see everyone has nice families with well dressed kids, nice holidays, cars, clothes etc. I didn't know if I was deluded or whether that really is the case- or not as DP seems to think!

ElectroStallion Thu 26-May-16 11:51:47

Good lord, most 30-somethings I know cannot buy a house, cannot afford children yet! They're still paying off their student loans in many cases.

glassgarden Thu 26-May-16 11:51:56

your sample size is much to small to draw any meaningful conclusion

glassgarden Thu 26-May-16 11:52:18

Too small!

Xmasbaby11 Thu 26-May-16 11:52:47

Are these your peers? I think some of my thirty something friends fit into this category but that's because I know them through work (so they have a decent job) or nct (so they have children).

It's a massive generalisation and therefore cannot be true.

19lottie82 Thu 26-May-16 11:52:49

Sorry but yes you do sound a bit deluded. I'm taking it you're referring to people in your 30s that you know?
What about more socially deprived groups / areas?

And what's with the age range thing? I don't really understand why you've formed this opinion?

GretchenBeckett Thu 26-May-16 11:53:25

I'm 30+ unemployed. In a council house. Does that make me lucky?

PurpleDaisies Thu 26-May-16 11:54:56

The key words are "from what I see". Where are you getting this from? Facebook? What people are telling you?

Hodooooooooor Thu 26-May-16 11:55:51

No-one is that limited in outlook, unimaginative, and quite unable to read even the forum they are currently posting on, are they?

Refusenick Thu 26-May-16 11:58:22

You do sound deluded. Even if the 30somethings who live on your street live the way you say they do, do you never read a newspaper? Do you even read Mumsnet???

UntilTheCowsComeHome Thu 26-May-16 11:58:51

I'm mid 30s and I have a lovely life.

However,
I don't own my own home.
I don't have a career; I work PT for just above minimum wage.
I don't, and never have had any savings.
I have never been on holiday abroad.
I don't drive.

And I had got married and had my DCs in my early 20s so I doubt I'm the type of 30 something you're talking about. grin

EssentialHummus Thu 26-May-16 12:00:31

It depends really. I'm 30 and feel that, everything considered, I have a good life. Others around me (in London) may still be finding their feet in careers, struggling to save up for a deposit, putting off children, struggling to pay off debt. I have friends who are working long hours in so-called prestigious (but precarious) jobs, and others scrabbling to make a career in difficult professions.

In terms of debt, house prices and university loans, I think this age may find it harder to have a good life than our immediate predecessors (though going back 50, 60, 70 years, life wasn't a picnic either). It depends really (again) - what makes life meaningful to you may differ from what I want, etc...

TheNaze73 Thu 26-May-16 12:00:39

I think YABU as you're generalising on a massive scale

Rafflesway Thu 26-May-16 12:01:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VeganCanBeFabulous Thu 26-May-16 12:02:21

I am 35. I have a decent life - I live in a reasonable area, my kids are well fed and clothed and my husband and I have a car each (because our jobs are an hour away in opposite directions) However, all my children's clothes and most of mine and my husband's come from eBay or charity shops. We haven't had a foreign holiday since our honeymoon 7 years ago. We struggle month to month and have no savings at all. I would love to drop my hours (we both work full time) but can't afford to.

I am in a much better position than lots of my friends. My 31 year old mate is living in a damp, cold rented house with her daughter, despite having an job and cannot afford to learn to drive let alone get a car. She has not had a holiday since her daughter was born 5 years ago. She sometimes has to call in sick to work because she can't afford the £5 bus fare. My 33 year old brother lives with my parents because he can't afford to live in the area he grew up in despite having a fairly good job as an electrician. I can only afford my life because I moved 150 miles north to get it!

StrawberryQuik Thu 26-May-16 12:02:34

Err well YABU a bit, there are lots of people using food banks etc. However I can understand feeling the poor one amongst your peers as I feel like that sometimes! DH studied economics and is the only one of his group of friends who didn't go into the city after.

We're a bit skint but chose to have DS now in our late 20s. Hopefully we'll be less skint by the time we get to our 30s. I think we come across as having a bit more money than we do as always have a summer holiday (nectar points for easy jet flights and stay free with relatives) and a nice albeit rented flat (lots of hand me down furniture and my mum is great at up cycling)...I guess the point is you can't really tell from external appearances.

ijustwannadance Thu 26-May-16 12:05:28

Your DH is right. You must live in a small happy bubble.

PNGirl Thu 26-May-16 12:05:55

Well, I am more comfortable in life at 31 than I was at 23 when I graduated. The main reason for this is that I've worked full time for 9 years and had several promotions and payrises. We're also onto our second home having bought and sold a 2 bed in our 20s. So I can see the point that barring redundancies and retraining it might look like we are 30 somethings with a good life. That said, we couldn't afford children even if we wanted them and we live in a relatively cheap area (Wiltshire) so it very much depends on where you are.

AliceInUnderpants Thu 26-May-16 12:08:04

YABU basing a generalisation on a small group of people you know.

I am 30-something - am disabled, divorced, with one disabled child and the other being assessed. We live in HA terrace and rely completely on the benefits system. We do run a car, and manage a break away (or two) a year, but I have to work and plan and scrimp and save for that, which doesn't come 'easy'. I manage to go out the house only a couple of times a week, and my mum does the majority of the housework for me. I have to 'share' my children with a father who does love them, but doesn't actually know how to be a parent.

I don't feel fucking "good".

In fact, thinking of most of my 30-something friends, I wouldn't say many of them are particularly comfortable.

PNGirl Thu 26-May-16 12:08:22

Sorry meant to say it might look like we are typical doing-ok 30-somethings but had we not both worked for the same companies since 2007 on a career trajectory it would be different.

KondosSecretJunkRoom Thu 26-May-16 12:11:11

Ffs grin really?

Do you remember that scene in Shawn of the Dead when Simon Pegg wanders across the street and buys stuff at the newsagents without realising that he was surrounded by zombies and the world had gone to hell...

Just saying

Queenofthebrae Thu 26-May-16 12:11:34

Obviously everyone's circumstances are different especially depending on where in the country you live in, but speaking personally my DH and I are in our v early 30s, expecting our first DC, own our own 3 bed house in a lovely village, both work full time and have a little savings BUT in order to have this lifestyle we love means my DH works out of the country 6 months a year.

littleGreenDragon Thu 26-May-16 12:15:56

Our hardest years have been our 30's - DH past I've very nearly done with.

Spent 20s saving hard for a house started with children late 20's.

We've had redundancies long hours, childcare loads of money concerns all lurking away in the back ground, worries about getting house in good state and keeping hold of it at some stages - we've done okay but hoping our 40s are a easier.

I think it's actually harder for people just behind us - people who didn't get any grants at Uni and had tuition fee and who came even later than us to housing market with even higher prices.

Onlyicanclean10 Thu 26-May-16 12:18:34

Are you Pollyanna?

jonsnowssocks Thu 26-May-16 12:24:10

I'm in my mid-30s and left the UK when I was 30, because living in London with my graduate level job was only enough to rent me a small room in a shared house, and I could never see the situation improving. I suppose London is particularly difficult though!

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