We have a bit of a rocky relationship - we've never really seen eye-to-eye on things. She has always been financially irresponsible and relies on our parents for money (she's 23) which always annoys me. She refuses to take responsibility for her actions, it's always someone else's fault, she doesn't see why she might be the problem. Has had about 7 jobs in as many years (there's always a problem with the people there/she ends up falling out with colleagues because 'they're bitchy', and so on and so forth). She has been given SO much help both financially, physically and mentally over the years (from me, parents and her ex-BF) but always fritters it away, and then the cycle of 'I have no money, can you lend me some' continues.
My main gripe is that she asks to sleep at mine at LEAST once a week. I have a small one-bed apartment and I'm an introvert. I don't mind hanging out with her but I don't see why she needs to sleep at mine so frequently. Her reason is always "I'm lonely/I feel emotional/I don't want to be on my own/it's easier if I stay at yours because you're closer to my work" and I can't help thinking YOU'RE AN ADULT. Learn how to be on your own for more than a week without asking for a sleepover.
She's not a particularly good guest either - will sit on the sofa ALL day watching stuff on my laptop, sleeps completely naked sprawled out on my bed, asks that we don't open the curtains so we're stagnating in the dark all day.. the list goes on.
WIBU to tell her that no she can't stay over, that I want my own space? And that we're adults, you can't just have a sleepover when you feel a bit sad? (In a slightly softer way!)
AIBU?
AIBU to not want sister staying over for no good reason?
RiverCambs · 23/05/2016 10:17
Yanbu. Of course not. I expect you love her but it doesn't sound like you like her at all ... and why would you have someone you don't like sleeping naked in your bed 
?
It sounds like she could do with someone giving her a wake-up call.
Be prepared for the shit to hit the fan when you tell her though - with your parents as well as her personally.
This is a bit of an issue for us as a family. There's only me, my sis, and my parents. We've always been close-knit (bar the scraps between me and sister) and my parents really want me to always be there for her. When I say 'She's not my responsibility' they give it 'But she's your SISTER. She would always be there for you'. Which is true, but I have never asked her for anything. I don't like feeling dependent on people and prefer to deal with things on my own - complete opposite of her.
It sounds to me that she has issues beyond needing to "get a grip".
I think you're right. She has no social skills really - she comes across as patronising and fake a lot of the time when she's talking to new people. She doesn't have any friends because they are all 'weird' or 'not able to talk about meaningful things' (she is an INCREDIBLY emotional person).
She also doesn't really understand basic social etiquette - she will answer her phone on dates and think nothing of having a full-blown convo with someone then and there, and when I tell her that's rude she'll say "But they called ME! It would be rude to ignore the call".
Her sleeping naked on your bed is quite odd. Do you have any idea of what's going on there?
She said she can't sleep with PJs/she ends up taking them off when she gets hot in the night or whatever. Which I get cause I hate wearing them too. But seeing someone other than an OH naked on your sofa or bed is just 
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