To think it's ok to be naked in front of your teens?

(905 Posts)

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Blackearlgrey Sun 22-May-16 08:12:53

DP and I have always been very carefree about nakedness and as our DC (all girls) have got older I have picked up that they're no longer all totally happy about this. Recently this has come to a head with the youngest (18) saying that she really doesn't like seeing her dad wander round without clothes on. He's a bit resistant to changing his habits--he exercises every morning, then puts his sweaty gym kit in the wash, before working his way to the shower in the altogether. Our other two, who are older, are a bit more relaxed about it, in fact the oldest one says she's glad this was our practice, so that she knew from an early age what adult bodies looked like. (I can identify with that, as I didn't know until several years after I DTD for the first time!) I've been happy to try to avoid the DC seeing me without clothes on if it makes them feel uncomfortable, but AIBU to think that as this is our home, me and DP are entitled to live as we choose. NB. No nakedness in communal areas when we have house guests of course.

I'm guessing I'm going to get responses from all parts of the spectrum here, from "It's no problem, everyone in the family gets their kit off at the earliest opportunity" right the way through to "Actually, I have never seen my husband's body with the light on". But interested to see what the overall view is. AIBU?

OP’s posts: |
Myinlawsdidthisthebastards Sun 22-May-16 08:14:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PPie10 Sun 22-May-16 08:14:54

Yabu if it's making others in the home uncomfortable then you should respect that. And you don't need to wander around naked to identify what adult bodies look likehmm

mommy2ash Sun 22-May-16 08:15:58

I think if it's got to the stage where your husband was aware it was making his daughter uncomfortable but carried on regardless that is unreasonable.

TheoriginalLEM Sun 22-May-16 08:16:20

err, its their home too. At best your dp doubds like an arse.

ReggaeShark Sun 22-May-16 08:16:25

Your DH IBU. Your daughter has said it makes her uncomfortable. Tell him to stop being so selfish. If he persists that's just perverse.

fuzzywuzzy Sun 22-May-16 08:16:30

My DP's dad used to walk around naked around the house. He wishes he hadn't. As do his siblings. They're all grown up now, & DP is careful to have at least a towel wrapped around his waist when making his way to/from the bathroom in front of DC.

So I'd say try and respect your DC's request.


Busybuzzybumblebee Sun 22-May-16 08:17:27

Once she stated that she feels uncomfortable he should have stopped. Very unfair on your dad to be made to feel uncomfortable in her home by having to see her dad's bits. I would have hated it

TheoriginalLEM Sun 22-May-16 08:17:46


Busybuzzybumblebee Sun 22-May-16 08:17:49

Dad = dd

acasualobserver Sun 22-May-16 08:19:22

It's not difficult to slip on a dressing gown.

AlwaysDancing1234 Sun 22-May-16 08:19:46

I think as soon as one of your children feels uncomfortable with it then it's time to at least put some underwear on.
DS is almost 9 now and is starting to get a little embarrassed if I wander from bathroom to bedroom with no clothes on, I just wrap a towel round me, simple.

Myinlawsdidthisthebastards Sun 22-May-16 08:20:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es Sun 22-May-16 08:20:42

Their feelings are valid and deserve respect.

jerryfudd Sun 22-May-16 08:21:50

I can't understand why he wants to continue despite knowing it makes her uncomfortable. Seriously, how difficult it is to just wrap a towel round his waist?!

peggyundercrackers Sun 22-May-16 08:21:59

If he is only going directly from bedroom to bathroom and not passing through the rest of the house and your DD knew he was en route then surely she can avoid him? I don't think this would be unreasonable.

If he was walking all over the house before he got to the shower room then I think yabu

larrygrylls Sun 22-May-16 08:22:20

I don't think a person feeling 'uncomfortable' should dictate everyone's behaviour.

For me it is a happy medium. If he is quickly and discreetly making his way to the shower, she can easily look away. If he is wandering around the house ostentatiously, he should probably be more considerate.

FeckinCrutches Sun 22-May-16 08:22:47

I couldn't think of anything worse than having to look at my Fathers penis flapping around on the way to the bathroom.

topcat2014 Sun 22-May-16 08:23:40

My DD is 9, and has not yet mentioned seeing me naked being a problem - and neither has she mentioned about her being naked - for example whilst helping wash her hair in the shower etc.

However, the minute the subject gets raised will be when we will probably both take more steps toward's privacy.

It, for me, is just another step away from childhood. Which, on one hand, is a tiny bit sad, but on the other hand 100% normal.

I have vague memories of parents naked - ie I know I have seen them, but not in any detail - and that is how it should be in my view.

Salene Sun 22-May-16 08:24:02

He need to stop it, how horrid for his kids. I can't think of anything worse as a teen or any age seeing my dad naked - yuk

Surely he can put a towel over his bits.

boodles Sun 22-May-16 08:24:34

I agree Larry.

peggyundercrackers Sun 22-May-16 08:25:22

Their feelings are valid and deserve respect.

Both parties involved have feelings and deserve respect - one persons feelings should not trump another's.

srslylikeomg Sun 22-May-16 08:25:24

Your dd needs to grow up - it's just a naked dad. It's not a sexual encounter it's a naked human. Imagine what nurses and doctors see everyday. I'd be worried to have such a prudish teen honestly!

larrygrylls Sun 22-May-16 08:25:47

And what if her Father feels 'uncomfortable' about the way his 18 year old daughter dresses. Should she respect that?

CakeNinja Sun 22-May-16 08:26:35

He needs to not do this now.
Our DC know we will sometimes be naked in our rooms/the bathroom and so while they are always always allowed in our room when they want to, they at 11 and 12 now stick their heads round tentatively to check the coast is clear and they aren't going to see their fathers hairy backside!
They don't bat an eyelid at naked me, and will come in regardless, but dp will always grab some shorts quickly now, and wrap a towel around himself between the bedroom and bathroom now.

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