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To question this use of social media

(21 Posts)
vulgarbunting Fri 20-May-16 19:22:12

For context, I work in a very young, fashion lead company. I'm in my early 30's. The team I work with range from 21 - 31. I manage two of them, including a 21 year old junior member of staff.

We were out last night as a team building thing. It was getting later, we had all had a few drinks, and started doing our (completely ridiculous) signature dance moves. As I did mine, my 21 yr old team member got his phone out and started to film me, saying 'I'm putting this on snapchat'.

I am careful with my social media presence, felt really uncomfortable, and knew that it was probably for his friends to laugh at. But to be fair, we were all fairly drunk.

AIBU to think his action was inappropriate and pull him up on it on Monday?

RaeSkywalker Fri 20-May-16 19:26:09

Did he actually put it on there? He might not have done it.

myownprivateidaho Fri 20-May-16 19:28:04

Definitely would be inappropriate to pull him up for it on Monday IMO. You should have just let him know at the time - after all he told you what he was doing, giving you the opportunity to object (would be different if he'd just done it without telling you). If you 'pull him up' for it you'll be disciplining him for something you essentially agreed to and participated in.

feathermucker Fri 20-May-16 19:33:12

You can't pull him up on it in work........it was a night out and entirely unrelated! You're not his manager once the office shuts.

If you're that bothered, you need to have a quiet word outside of work hours!

MrsJayy Fri 20-May-16 19:36:27

Everything goes on line these days im afraid its kind of what the kids do its thoughtless though maybe a quiet word at the tine or you could have just stopped your moves

Iggi999 Fri 20-May-16 19:36:30

Work night out though, there are lots of things you could do on one that would land you in trouble. He just needs a firm word about boundaries.

GeorgeTheThird Fri 20-May-16 19:45:17

You needed to say at the time if you were unhappy. I don't know how snapchat works, is it public like Twitter? Can you ask him to take it down but without bollocking him?

AdrenalineFudge Fri 20-May-16 19:45:43

You'd be unreasonable to pull him up on it on Monday. If you want to play the po-faced manager then do so consistently, not as and when it suits you.

MrsJayy Fri 20-May-16 19:52:19

Snap chat is like messenger you send videos and stuff

Iggi999 Fri 20-May-16 19:52:21

"That was a good night on Friday wasn't it? We'd great dance moves! But seriously though it wasn't cool to take a photo of me and snapchat it, if we're out again I want you to assure me that won't happen".
Hardly po-faced.

MrsJayy Fri 20-May-16 19:54:15

Its not public like twitter

Okay377 Fri 20-May-16 19:54:36

You shouldn't 'pull him up on it at work' as that sounds like making it a disciplinary issue. It sounds as if you have a good relationship with him and the rest of the team so can't you just have a friendly chat with him at work - say we need to be careful professionally with social media and I'm very careful about it for these reasons so I'm not happy with pictures of me being posted on snapchat/online?

fastdaytears Fri 20-May-16 19:56:06

You had two choices- say something at the time or suck it up.
It would be different if you'd found out subsequently but he told you what he was doing and you didn't say that you weren't happy

MrsJayy Fri 20-May-16 19:59:50

Oh yes what iggi said is fine

Iggi999 Fri 20-May-16 20:06:03

MrsJayy I've been waiting 8 years for someone to say "what Iggi said" grin

AdrenalineFudge Fri 20-May-16 20:06:57

Iggi grin

What's next off your bucket list? grin

MrsJayy Fri 20-May-16 20:10:54

You are very welcome grin

Iggi999 Fri 20-May-16 20:13:18

ah that's enough for one decade halo

BarbaraofSeville Fri 20-May-16 20:14:06

YANBU. I turned off the ability for others to tag me on FB because I was utterly sick of looking at it the day after a night out and finding my page cluttered up with a load of crap photos from the night before.

And don't get me started on the way that you get to a new pub and the first thing half the group does is get their phones out to check in hmm.

Toddzoid Fri 20-May-16 20:38:30

Snapchat isn't public, generally (unless he's set it to public viewing which the vaaaast majority of people who aren't celebrities won't have done)nobody except the people he follows and that follow him will see it. It also deleted itself after 24 hours.
This is if he set it as his snapchat 'story'.

If he sent it to someone in particular they will have only been able to view it for the duration then never again as it deletes after one view and the person receiving it cannot save it.

Snapchat is pretty much used to send dirty and stupid things to one another since there's no repercussions as its deleted after viewing. "burn after reading" type set up.

HOWEVER still inappropriate of him to do it without your permission. Yanbu at all

trashcansinatra Fri 20-May-16 20:40:22

Feathermucker - wrong I'm afraid. Social occasions that are obviously identifiable as work things ( like this is, and Christmas parties) are treated like time in work and people can and are disciplined as if they are in work for misdemeanours.

In this case, I might be having a quiet, light-hearted conversation on Monday morning. Or just forget it.

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