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To not take the baby to baby groups?

(33 Posts)
Ivegotyourgoat Thu 19-May-16 17:14:15

Ds is 11 months and I haven't really taken him to any baby groups, and tend to stay at home most days.

We did go to a few courses, baby massage, baby music and baby sensory but they were just short courses.

I only really thought about it when my neighbour asked why I don't take him to any groups (she's nosey).

I just find I've got enough to do around the house, I'm a bit of a slave to his naps too and he has one really long nap. I just love this time when I either have a mad clean or put my feet up with some nice lunch and watch tv.

I find come 3.30 I'm really busy making dinner, doing reading and homework with ds1, driving ds1 to his after school activities so I guess I like quiet days. Plus if I go out I prefer a walk round the shops and some coffee and cake.

Is ds really missing out?

bibbetybob Thu 19-May-16 17:20:33

I found groups fantastic, especially once you've made some friends. It's a new experience for the DCs and imo helps them get used to socialising with new people, it's a break for you and it makes the day go quicker!
If you don't feel you need it don't go but I do think they're great if you get one that suits you with people you click with, and that DC enjoy (easier said than done I know).

MissBattleaxe Thu 19-May-16 17:23:01

YANBU. I hated baby groups. My DS played with his cousin, who was a similar age and then I left him in a paid-for playgroup for two hours a week when he was 2. He is perfectly sociable and no harm came to him from being deprived of a baby group.

With DS1 I found baby groups cliquey and uncomfortable and a chore.

DriveMeToTennessee Thu 19-May-16 17:23:24

Baby groups are my idea of torture. Yanbu, your DS will have plenty of opportunities to socialise with other children in the future

GoldPlatedBacon Thu 19-May-16 17:24:02

Do what suits you.

I only go to baby groups/softplay because my dd becomes so miserable and bored at home with me for longer than 2 days in a row. She's much happier watching other kids and playing with new toys. As per pp it breaks up my day too.

crazywriter Thu 19-May-16 17:25:01

I admit that the groups were originally mainly for me. They're still really for me but now my daughter has learnt to share and we're slowly getting out of tantrums when she doesn't get something.

I did baby swimming for a few weeks and that's all. Didn't know that some people might find that unusual.

Yanbu do what suits you.

Pinkheart5915 Thu 19-May-16 17:26:56

My ds is 8 months, I take him out swimming and round the park to see friends / family but never to baby groups I tried a couple but didn't like them.
My DH on the other hand he loves the dad and baby group he takes ds to every week

Do whatever works for you

Artandco Thu 19-May-16 17:29:47

My idea of hell. At 11 months they are happy just doing what you want. A walk in park is fine. You have an older child so he presumably sees them and friends children.

superwormissuperstrong Thu 19-May-16 17:30:22

I would say that baby groups are for the benefit of mums - it's only really at toddler stage that I think the children get much from them...

TweeterandtheMonkeyman Thu 19-May-16 17:31:15

Baby groups are only really for your first baby aren't they? I went to loads with dc1 but none with dc2. I think they are to meet other mums, young babies don't need to socialise!

DancingDinosaur Thu 19-May-16 17:32:42

God no. I went to one baby group once. Hated it. I did take dc swimming and met up with friends from nct though.

toffeeboffin Thu 19-May-16 17:40:02


Groups are OK, but honestly sometimes more hassle than they are worth.

It's nice to meet others mums but it sounds like your DS has social time anyway with other kids.

captainproton Thu 19-May-16 17:42:33

I have started to take my DC3 to a baby rhyme group at our library. I combine it with doing the grocery shop. I never took the other two to anything but even at 3 months she is very awake and alert. Constantly rolling and wanting to be stimulated, with the others if I tried they just slept or were not interested. I have friends and groups I go with the preschoolers and she just watches. This one I do when they at preschool, it's 30mins twice a week when I can have fun with her, I don't have to organise it, We just go along, sing and bounce with no interruptions or chores to do. Plus I get tea and a biscuit (win).

I don't think it matters what you do at that age, with the others by the time they were exploring and wrecking the house it was time to get them out their visiting groups and playing with others.

my DD nearly 2 has never been to a baby group but she loves kids her own age, happy to share etc, interacts well with all ages and is definitely not shy smile do whatever works for you, you're doing an amazing job flowers

Believeitornot Sat 21-May-16 19:33:07

I was going to say YABU on reading the title but I can see that it's not your first child and you've done other stuff!

Baby gets out, sees the world, job done. YANBU

Trumpette Sat 21-May-16 19:35:29

My kids are now in junior school and when they were little
I rarely took them to toddler groups as I found them dull and competitive!

I did take the children swimming, to the park, to coffee shops, grocery stores and I was always home for their naps as this was time for me to watch TV, sleep after a bad night or do some house related stuff.

If it makes you feel better find one group you like and go to it as a compromise but don't worry if not your children will be more than ok with spending time with you and day to day stuff. X

Haroldplaystheharmonica Sat 21-May-16 19:37:38

I loved baby groups and made such good friends there. Over 10 years later, we meet all the time and go away for weekends with and without the kids.

Personally, I would have been bored stiff stuck pottering in the house all day but each to there own. Even if you hate your child missing their naps, one day isn't going to kill them.

Elle80 Sat 21-May-16 19:39:29

I hated baby groups too OP so to me YANBU. With my eldest DD I structured my days pretty much like yours. With my second DD we went out a lot more - every morning, usually with my parents in tow, for the year I was on maternity leave. I never felt like either were missing out on anything, and they had plenty of social interaction once they started nursery. I believe the first year is a strong bonding time and you do that however you feel comfortable

youknowwhattodo Sat 21-May-16 19:41:33

I hated baby groups. I had friends and didn't need/want to make any. I used to hate it when people used to say i should go to make friends confused

sandle Sat 21-May-16 19:44:30

I started taking my dd to 3 different groups a week at 8 months old, now she is 13 months and I only take her to 1 of those groups as the other 2 were rubbish, (one was broken toys, other mums sitting in a circle ignoring their kids, naughty older kids pushing my dd etc, the other was for under 1's), and now the weather is nicer I'd rather take her for a walk and play in the park. I am going to take her to tumble tots and start swimming as well.

Artandco Sat 21-May-16 19:46:18

I was so bored at the odd one so went to. Just sat watching baby play alone on floor. Pointless

At a small age I prefered to just put baby in sling and go and do something interesting like museum/ theatre/ cinema/ shopping/ a walk/ visit people

Also my friends from before children remained the same

UmbongoUnchained Sat 21-May-16 19:48:32

We go 3 times a week to different groups. I've made some life long friends and my daughter gets on really well with all the other toddlers. They've all grown up together from a few months old, it's really nice.

Smartiepants79 Sat 21-May-16 19:49:14

See, staying in everyday would have been my idea of hell!
I was also quite anal about nap time though so wouldn't have been out between 1 and 3.
I think it's not an issue while your son is so young. Do what suits you as long as aren't feeling isolated or lonely.
I would maybe start looking for a toddler group or two in another 6 months or so to start socialising DS.

pristinechristine Sat 21-May-16 19:50:16


I hated baby groups. I did try a couple, baby massage and baby signing, but never really stuck at anything or did anything regularly.

I think they're more for the parent than the baby and if you're not keen why bother.

DD started preschool at 2.5 and despite not having been to these groups she was fine and quite able to socialise.

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