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Having a girl after having boys

(39 Posts)
Lymmmummy Mon 16-May-16 20:24:05

I have just found out I am expecting a girl - let me say I am enormously happy to be having a healthy child and I am very glad to be alive having suffered from a life threatening illness several years ago - so I know I am being unreasonable

But I am feeling odd about having a girl after having already got a 6 year old boy - I don't know how it will work - anyone had similar and got any stories to share?

I am also slightly sad as I imagined I was having a boy and perhaps had hopes of my son having a brother and all of the positives that may have brought -

it's weird because when I was having DS I was slightly disappointed it was not a girl - now I wouldn't be without him he has brought so much sheer joy to our lives - I sort of know what to do with boys and am finding the prospect of a girl slightly scary

Please tell me I am being ridiculous

EatShitDerek Mon 16-May-16 20:25:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bibbitybobbityyhat Mon 16-May-16 20:27:14

You are being ridiculous! Congratulations on your healthy baby and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

UmbongoUnchained Mon 16-May-16 20:28:38

I grew up with brothers and I'm probably exactly the same as them. Just with a splash of glitter.

arethereanyleftatall Mon 16-May-16 20:29:54

Girls are brilliant. Enjoy!

Gowgirl Mon 16-May-16 20:30:29

The clothes are nicer!
My girl is able to amuse herself a bit longer than the boys......
She will be lovely op, congratulations!

meditrina Mon 16-May-16 20:31:25

Two DS then DD.

When they're small, there's really no difference because of sex (other than boys can spray pee further than girls); other differences will be personality (not sex) related. And by the time she's bigger, you'll be so used to her that you'll know what to do with her (whether or not that extends to girls in general)

Monroe Mon 16-May-16 20:34:20

You are being ridiculous 😊 a big congratulations

I felt exactly the same, slightly disappointed when I found out my first was a boy - just because I thought I wouldn't know what to do with a boy. But I fell utterly and completely in love with him so when I found out my second was a girl I felt the same again in reverse.

But of course it was perfectly fine. They are as different as chalk and cheese, not because of being boy / girl but because their personalities are so different. And of course I fell completely and utterly in love with her also.

FirstWeTakeManhattan Mon 16-May-16 20:35:38

Babies are just gorgeous little babies for at least a year, and by that time you'll feel totally fine about it.

Congratuations on your pregnancy!

tinyterrors Mon 16-May-16 20:43:52

I can see where you're coming from op. I had a girl and then a boy and I was worried about the difference between them.

As pp have said there's not much difference between them as babies, with the notable exception that girls can't pee all over you/themselves/the wall when you're changing them ☺

My dd and ds are thick as thieves, they have the same kind of relationship as myds1 and ds2. My dd just likes some more girly things and likes reading while da bounces off the walls, but this could be due to age.

There's honestly nothing to worry about. Once your dd is a few days old you'll be wondering what you were worrying about.

NatashaRomanoff Mon 16-May-16 20:46:04

I had three boys before my girl! We were both thrilled and petrified in equal measure.

She is now 2.5 and there is literally no difference, except she sometimes wears dresses, and doesn't have a penis.

PannaDoll Mon 16-May-16 20:52:27

I think I understand what you're going through. I thought I was having another girl last pregnancy and was surprised to be handed a boy at delivery lol. In a split second I had too yen this little girl I thought was coming and had imagined into our lives after the last few months.

I was always wary of boys as I am part of a matriarchy. We are a girl family for sure.

The good news is that I obviously wouldn't trade him for any other kid; he's a lovely but diferrent experience to my daughter and things have a way of working themselves out.

Congratulations, good luck, you'll be fine x

MyLocal Mon 16-May-16 21:01:57

I feel very blessed to have one of each, and wouldn't have it any other way.

steff13 Mon 16-May-16 21:05:15

My daughter is 5, my sons are 17 and 14.

My daughter loves dolls, dresses, makeup (mine), legos, cars, Nerf guns, Star Wars, and dinosaurs.

My boys when they were little also loved dolls, makeup (mostly just nail polish) legos, cars, Nerf guns, Star Wars, and dinosaurs.

She's different in the way that all children are different from one another. She did manage to pee in her own hair when she was a baby, which the boys never managed to do.

JeffreySadsacIsUnwell Mon 16-May-16 21:12:44

I have a girl and a boy. They're best friends. I know so because they write 'rankings' of friends and 'Mummy' is always at the bottom grin.

Trust me, your children will find a way to gang up on you regardless of age/gender differences.

Mine are almost 7 and 4 and are absolutely desperate to have 'lots more' siblings, not going to happen, but nice they think like that.

As for gender differences, yes, there are a couple. My DD's favourite colour is blue or green, my son's favourite is pink, or purple at a push. I have just given in and bought DS a sequinned flamingo top that he begged for and earnestly presented 63p of his savings to buy... He has also requested a Barbie. Meanwhile DD wants 'proper climbing shoes' and a rope. From my experience so far, it's an awful lot easier having a girl because society is much more willing to accommodate girls' "opposite gender-stereotyped" tastes than boys'. Bloody difficult being a feminist and having a boy, I feel constantly torn between letting DS have the pink frilly stuff he craves (and DD rejects) and knowing that he's coming up to the age of merciless teasing, whereas with DD, anything is acceptable.

I do have friends with 7yo boys and 0-1yo girls - the boys are all fantastic with their little sisters, really generous and indulgent. Wish I'd had a big brother!

Ilovewillow Mon 16-May-16 21:59:38

Tbh there's not a lot of difference, my daughter first born is not a girly girl and my son loves a bit of glitter. We have five yrs difference between ours but they both get on really well despite the age and gender difference. On a lighter note the choice of girls clothes is much better! Enjoy!

KatyN Mon 16-May-16 22:55:32

Nappy changes are completely different! Way more crevices to get poo stuck in, less risk of being weed on.
I'm only 4 months in but have one of each too. I assumed our second would be another boy just because I had already made a boy!

HormonalHeap Mon 16-May-16 23:01:09

I've just had an amazing girly kitchen chat with my dd18, in a way that my ds just wouldn't have the patience or interest. I know it's a long way down the line for you, but something to look forward to!

honeylulu Mon 16-May-16 23:03:54

I felt the same. Had a boy, felt panicked that I didn't know about boys (had no brothers, single sex education etc). He was just an awesome little person. Gender irrelevant. Nearly a decade later had a girl. Panicked. All our friends seemed to have all boys. I didn't know what to do with a girl! Another awesome little person (and more boyish than her brother in lots of ways ... they both liked pink, dolls and dancing but she likes football too and he hates it!)

LentilAsAnything Mon 16-May-16 23:30:58

YABR! smile
I have a 5yo boy and a baby girl. He adores her!
And she adores him.
Like Jeffrey, my 5yo also ranks his favourites, and his sister comes out top!
I think their gender is irrelevant. They are just who they are.
Best of luck with your pregnancy and soon to be here daughter. Enjoy.

waitingforsomething Tue 17-May-16 01:47:51

I have a 3 and a half year old girl and a 10 month boy. I thought it would be easier to have 2 the same and was a bit nervous but so far I can report he is pretty much exactly the same as she was although a bit more chilled in the day and a bit less sleepy at night. They are both gorge and adore each other, don't fret smile

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 17-May-16 01:58:13

Keep one end clean and feed the other end. They then start talking and you work out what they like. Apart from that?

CheerfulYank Tue 17-May-16 02:36:25

Yes, I had a DS then six years later a DD. Then two years later another DS! grin

It's fine. DS1 had a hard time adjusting for awhile, but he has always been very kind to DD and very loving toward her. Now that she's three he gets irritated with her because she messes with his things and picks fights with him (she is a fierce exhausting little thing) but they are quite close.

They play Star Wars together, go outside together, etc. She likes her dollhouse and watching Frozen, which he isn't as into. But he will read to her and they play their own made up games like chasing monsters around the house.

MattDillonsPants Tue 17-May-16 02:55:39

My mate had 3 boys and then when the younger boy was 9 she had twin girls.

She found the hardest thing was that girls' friendships are conducted differently.

So...one example is that on the last day of term before Christmas in year 1, her girls came home with a number of little gifts from their best friends...and she'd not thought to send her girls in with any...because her boys had never done that.

She felt terrible! I told her not to worry about it...but it was little stuff which got her in that way.

Toddzoid Tue 17-May-16 07:16:48

When they're babies they're the same. The only thing that's different is I found it easier to wipe poo up on a girl than boy grin, just because it used to get stuck all around the balls whereas with a girl it's front to back and done. Sorry, that's more crass than it sounded in my head...

When they grow up there are some distinct differences but it varies child to child so this probably isn't sex based, possibly a link though. My DS is very simplistic, happy with small things, no drama. DD's are full to the brim of drama, everything is a drama in fact. Way more tantrums, bickering, making a big deal out of nothing. I've found girls harder to handle personally but I don't want to base that purely on their sex, it's possibly just natural different temperament.

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