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AIBU?

I co-sleep with DS (2.11)

94 replies

Bitchqueen90 · 14/05/2016 21:44

Ds is three next month. I still co sleep with him. I'm a lone parent, he was only breastfed until 6 months old. He slept in his own bed for a while when he was younger but when exH and I split he started coming back in with me (just for a bit of company/comfort and it just carried on).

He sleeps in his own bed at exH's, my parents etc. Is it really bad that I co sleep, should I be putting him in his own bed?

OP posts:

Report

comedycentral · 14/05/2016 21:44

I don't think it's bad at all, he is only little. He won't still be there when he's 15!

NeedACleverNN · 14/05/2016 21:45

No...if you are happy and he is happy and you are both sleeping well then carry on!

I couldn't do it as I love sleeping on my own (even my dh sleeps elsewhere) and my dc sleep better on their own too

x2boys · 14/05/2016 21:46

Ds 2 is six and still Co sleeps admittedly he has asd and learning and will not sleep alone but whatever makes life easier ?

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 14/05/2016 21:46

Of course YANBU! DD started moving into her own bed when she was 4 or 5.

x2boys · 14/05/2016 21:46

Learning disabilities *

trufflehunterthebadger · 14/05/2016 21:46

good for you. DD (6) and I cosleep as often as possible, i love sleeping with her.

if i were a single mum we would definitely cosleep. there's nothing like cuddling up with your child

AndersArms · 14/05/2016 21:48

My DS is 3.5 and still co sleeps, but with DH not me. Dad co slept until she was 5 and then moved quite happily to her own room. I'm 30 weeks pregnant and we only have a 3 bed house DC3 will be in my room, probably co sleeping, so DS is bound to be in with DH for a while longer. Works for us.

Bitchqueen90 · 14/05/2016 21:49

Thanks all. It seems that co sleeping is a bit taboo with people I know, everyone tries to give me "tips" on how to get him to sleep alone. To be honest I don't think he'd make a fuss going in his own bed but we're both happy how we are!

OP posts:

thescruffiestgiantintown · 14/05/2016 21:50

Cosleeping is one of my favourite things about being a Mum. I really hope my children still come into my bed for a long time yet.

I remember sleeping in my parents' bed as a child and it was wonderful. I was an anxious child and it was the only place I felt as though nothing could harm me.

edwinbear · 14/05/2016 21:51

I'm jealous. I don't co sleep during the week as I get up early and don't want to wake them, but usually scoop a child out of their bed on a Fri/Sat night to sleep with me they are 4 and 6.

Pico2 · 14/05/2016 21:52

DD is 5.5 and sleeps in with us given the chance. She likes to be on my side of the bed and I end up with not much room.

As long as he has his own bed, so it's his choice, it's fine.

MNetter15 · 14/05/2016 21:54

My favourite place in the world is to be tucked up in bed with my toddler ds

Mari50 · 14/05/2016 21:56

I coslept with my DD until a few months ago, she's 7. Not always all night but for a part of the night every night. Did her room up recently and made a big deal of getting her the bed she wanted, she never wants to come to bed with me now but will occasionally join me about 4am. I have no issues with cosleeping, I think it's lovely. Her dad has significant issues with cosleeping. Which maybe explains why we no longer live together.

AliceInUnderpants · 14/05/2016 21:56

I think the 'official' stance on it is that it is expected they have somewhere safe and clean they could sleep, if they chose to, of their own.

My nearly-8 year old is only just starting to stay all night in her own bed more often than not. I must admit, when she climbed in the other night with a cough, I enjoyed the snuggles

FagHagAur · 14/05/2016 21:58

I still co sleep with my five year old. My three year old sleeps in his own room however!

Bitchqueen90 · 14/05/2016 21:59

He has his own bed. I did his bedroom up beautifully and he's hardly ever in it. He will on the odd occasion say he wants to sleep in his bed but he usually wakes up and ends up coming back in with me anyway.

OP posts:

ArriettyMatilda · 14/05/2016 21:59

Co sleep with my 2.5 year old for half of the night. I go from feeling sorry for those who miss out on all the cuddles to feeling pissed off about the covers being kicked off every single night!

mirime · 14/05/2016 21:59

3 year old DS has been co-sleeping with us since he was 7 months old. I went back to work and he refused to sleep in his cot anymore. We also don't have his room sorted yet - moved when he was about 4 months, haven't got round to it yet for various reasons. Hoping to get it sorted this year.

It is difficult sometimes but the way I look at it, in 10 years time we won't look back and think how awful it was!

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 14/05/2016 21:59

Also a single parent. DS has just turned 4 and still co sleeps. He has a bed of his own in his bedroom, in which he has never slept and we also currently have the spare futon laid down ready in my room. For most of April he was starting the night in the spare bed and coming in to mine somewhere around 11-12o'c. This made me more tired so when he said he wanted to start the night in my bed again I was happy to go with it. It was my push for him to move out then - my back was quite bad and I suspect/ed co-sleeping was an aggravating factor. But he's literally just (self-)weaned so it wasn't great timing in retrospect, he needed contact and reassurance and continuity and love.

I love it, and I will miss him (and randomly panic about him ) when he goes. I will also love spreading out across the bed, and not having little legs hooked over me while I try to get comfortable.

YANBU.

DixieNormas · 14/05/2016 22:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 14/05/2016 22:03

Never co-slept with either of mine. Although dd used to come in for an hour in the morning after a 5 or 6 o'clock feed.

But if you are both happy. And both get some sleep, then it's fine.

scandichick · 14/05/2016 22:03

Read Sarah Ockwell-Smith's blog, she'll make you feel good about it instead of concerned. It's hard to argue with biology (but don't tell Gina Ford).

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Oriunda · 14/05/2016 22:05

DS has his own room/bed but comes in with us every night - usually around 4am. No problem with it here - there'll come a time when he won't want to anymore and I need to treasure these moments.

villainousbroodmare · 14/05/2016 22:06

I am often surprised and occasionally repulsed by the number of people who sleep with their pets. Grimy, hairy, drooly dogs and cats on and in beds is very common in first world countries, where sleeping with your child is somehow frowned upon. Bizarre.

GirlOutNumbered · 14/05/2016 22:07

If I were a single mum I would have them all in my bed.
:)
Infact I was thinking of a camping trip while DH away and the thought of us all sleeping on one mattress makes me smile.
Sounds like you're happy so all is good.

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