H's family live in Europe. He hasn't seen them in years due to him needing a visa (he's from Middle East) and he is lazy about that sort of stuff.
Anyway, a while back we had a row about him getting a European visa. I can't quite recall exactly what started it but he was very defensive about it and something didn't feel right to me. He was absolutely insistent he wanted the visa incase we went away as a family. (He doesn't need one of he travels with me but was also insistent that it was safer if he had one himself).
He complains endlessly (really really endlessly) about money. How we don't have any. He always says 'can't afford it' whenever I want to do anything as a family and we won't be having a holiday this year due to money.
So, fast forward to today:
He came in from work and announced he is going to visit his family at the end of the month. He is going alone and will be taking the car.
By 'the car' he means the family and not his car which he uses purely for work. It is probably not really road legal (has problems) and he doesn't trust it to go all the way to France and back. And I would never put the kids in it. But it's his car so I don't get involved in him driving it to work etc.
I may have over reacted but it was be way he spoke to me. He just informed me it was happening that we aren't all going, when he is going and he's taking the car. There was no discussion. No conversation. Nothing.
Topped off by the real reason for the visa coming out - which I have no issue with but why lie in an earlier argument?
Basically I wasn't impressed. I didn't about swear or have a go at him but he could see I wasn't happy. It has scuppered plans I had already made for the same dates and I am not happy about him taking the car.
He saw this and it escalated very quickly into a full on argument (no DC present) where he was ranting and raving that I am trying to control him and bully him and he has every right to just tell me and take the car as he paid for half of it and I use it all the time.
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AIBU?
WIBU in my reaction?
126 replies
MrsDeathOfRats · 10/05/2016 15:55
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