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AIBU?

To not go to Christening

18 replies

peoplepleaser70 · 06/05/2016 08:03

I'll keep it brief... My good friend is having her DC christened on Fathers Day. It's not local so will take up most of the day, including travelling. Obvs my DP will want a nice day with our DC, I want to see my Dad and FIL, and also DC1 will want to see his Dad, who isn't my Partner. I would feel so bad not going but it's Father's Day! Which means a lot in our Family.

OP posts:
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MLGs · 06/05/2016 08:06

To me fathers' day isn't that important so I wouldn't not go for that reason.

However it's up to you and there is no obligation to go. I wouldn't assume "it's fathers' day" would carry much weight with everyone, so I might say "we have planned x that day", which would be your fathers' day plans, instead.

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Writerwannabe83 · 06/05/2016 08:13

Father's Day happens every year.

I'm pretty sure it's not your one and only chance you have to spend time with the men in your life and I'm assuming DC see their dad every day anyway?

It's a bit of a rubbish excuse really Grin

Mind you, I hate Christenings so in your shoes I'd be looking for any excuse to get out of it too Grin

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CaptainCrunch · 06/05/2016 08:17

Up to you but I doubt many people would instantly think "oh, it's fathers day...that might cut numbers down". It just sounds like a lame excuse.

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Vixxfacee · 06/05/2016 08:17

Father's day is just another day. Yabu

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ladymariner · 06/05/2016 08:23

Not to me, it's not. Fathers Day is very important to us, so YANBU, op

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Stardust160 · 06/05/2016 08:23

We had my sons christening on Mother's Day. Everyone still attended they just did something another day. It's all a marketing scheme anyways the same as Valentine's Day etc. Christening is a one of occasion you could see your DF another day.

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RedOnHerHedd · 06/05/2016 08:25

I wouldn't want to go either OP, send a card and apologise for not being there and have a lovely Father's Day with the men in your life. Smile

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WanHeda · 06/05/2016 08:27

Celebrate Father's day on another date, the day before perhaps.

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NicknameUsed · 06/05/2016 08:33

Father's day isn't a big deal in our house either. It's just a marketing scheme, unlike Mothering Sunday which is part of Lent.

Don't go if you don't want to but don't use father's day as an excuse. It is pretty lame, and your friend will think less of you.

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talkingtoclarry · 06/05/2016 09:00

Fathers Day is just as important as Mothers Day so no OP, YANBU. You don't have to feel guilty for wanting to spend the day with family rather than travelling for a christening.

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PPie10 · 06/05/2016 09:02

Yanbu, I wouldn't go either. It might not be a big deal to other people but who cares about what they choose to do on the day, it's about your family.

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sooperdooper · 06/05/2016 09:09

Fathers day and Mother's Day (like valentines) are made up holidays and can be 'celebrated' whenever you want, why wait for hallmark to tell you to do something nice for your DH/dad/Fil etc - just do something nice anyway on any day/week/month you feel like

If you don't want to go to the christening don't go, but Father's Day is a lame excuse imo

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dolkapots · 06/05/2016 09:10

If it means a lot to you then YANBU. Your friend might see it as other posters do though, that you can "celebrate" FD anytime, so do be prepared for her to be annoyed.

I do think though that the vast majority of people who do christenings nowadays are doing it as a tradition, rather than a religious act, so in that way it has become like MD, FD etc.

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LouBlue1507 · 06/05/2016 09:19

YANBU - Father's Day is more important to some than others and if it's important to your family then you spend the day with them.

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peoplepleaser70 · 06/05/2016 09:24

Thanks all... mixed opinions but Fathers Day is very important to us and not just another day as that's just how I have been brought up so I guess I have to base it on that. May say we already have a meal planned as someone suggested above (which may well be true). The Christening was originally in our home town which I would have 100% worked plans around it and gone but that's just not possible with the change of venue. Thanks for the advice Smile

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MissBattleaxe · 06/05/2016 09:27

YANBU. If it's a special day for your family, it's perfectly OK to say you've made plans for Father's Day.

Your friend knows it's on Father's Day so it shouldn't come as a shock. She should know that to some it's special and to some it's not. Neither mindset is wrong,. Every family is different.

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MiddleClassProblem · 06/05/2016 09:31

I would celebrate Father's Day the Saturday as I would have the Sunday but done cards and pressies with DH Sunday morning before leaving

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sooperdooper · 06/05/2016 11:01

Your friend knows it's on Father's Day so it shouldn't come as a shock

She might not, I couldn't tell you when it is :) just explain you've got plans OP, but the friend may genuinely not have a clue it's fathers day

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