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to ask if there is a friend matching website?

(37 Posts)
pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 14:51:05

Is there such thing?
I have recently moved to a new place, don't really know anyone here and haven't made any friends within the time I've been here.(6months) I have been to babygroup but while it's fine to chat to people there I find it hard to "ask someone out" (that's a bit how it feels like..). Not sure if that's the done thing? What if they say no...

How can i make friends?
I have 2 young kids and currently staying at home, days are pretty busy but sometimes would be nice to chat to somebody, have a coffee, paydate for kids etc
Pls tell me what are the normal ways of making friends? Or does it just happen?I haven't felt the need to make friends for so many years before the move, and thought that somehow it does just happen, but what if it doesn't .
I really am not a socially awkward weirdosmile,
Or maybe i am confused

PirateSmile Tue 03-May-16 14:54:22

Just ask on here if there's anyone in your area.

KateBeckett Tue 03-May-16 14:56:55

Have a look on mummysocial

EponasWildDaughter Tue 03-May-16 14:59:42

I think it's such a shame that Mumsnet local hasn't really taken off for this sort of thing. Last time i looked (admittedly a year ago now) there was tumble weed blowing through my one!


Scoose Tue 03-May-16 15:01:28

Yes people very rarely post on my local page either where about are you op?

CrazyDuchess Tue 03-May-16 15:03:15

Facebook - local gossip girl type pages??

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 15:05:07

I'm almost as far north as you can go without getting your feet wet... Near the " monster" wink

pigsDOfly Tue 03-May-16 15:05:40

You could try MN local.

Try googling 'meet up groups' for your area. Most places have a whole heap of different type of interest groups. You're bound to find something of interest, Although they seem to meet up in the evenings, don't know if your're looking for day time stuff.

I know the Women's Institute has a very old fashioned image but a lot of the groups nowadays are full of young women and can be very trendy. I looked into one WI group where I used to live and it was definitely aimed at the 30/40 year old range. I'm way past thatsmile

Are any of your DC in school. What about joining things there. Do they still have the PTA or perhaps it goes under another name.

You have to push yourself a bit with the mother and baby groups and ask people to meet in the park or similar. When I had my DC years ago I found that a lost of the women were in your position and knew no one - I was also new to the area when I had my DC - and would be happy to go to someone's house for a play date.

Catmuffin Tue 03-May-16 15:06:50

I met a close friend of mine at a toddler group about ten years ago and i still see her every week. I just asked her over for a cup of tea with her kids and that was that.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut Tue 03-May-16 15:07:01

Like Tinder for friends? Now there's an idea...

IcyTeaAndScoopyScoopyDogDog Tue 03-May-16 15:07:40

I am a member of Girl Crew. Its a FB group all over the world.

You can meet friends, join clubs, put up an event - if you want to go to the cinema, put it up, get some people to go with etc!

I love it!

IcyTeaAndScoopyScoopyDogDog Tue 03-May-16 15:08:20

And GC started on Tinder, someone just looking for friends and it snowballed from there!

TheWildRumpyPumpus Tue 03-May-16 15:09:17

Recent arrival in Northants here too and I'd love a 'New friends' facility on the local talk board!

I think meeting people is relatively easy with a small baby - go to plenty of baby groups and that's where lots of lAsting friendships can be made. Suggest a coffee at the end of a group and just get chatting!

Blossom591 Tue 03-May-16 15:11:24

I follow girl crew on fb it looks fab but there's not one near me sad
How about meetup?
Do you have a dog? I only ask because borrow my doggy seems almost like a friend/dating type site to me!

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 15:20:23

Thank you all!

I mean something like Match dot com
Where you enter your interest kuds ages etc, what you are looking for in a friend and it will find you a match!!! grin

In reality i have one DC in private nursery part time , the other one (baby) with me all the time. DH works a lot, so I literally don't have any child free time at the moment ( except for right now on the sofa with chocolates, tea and mumsnet smile- both are sleeping, which is a minor miracle)

At the nursery most parents seem to be working and we are sort of barely saying hello, would be a big jumo from that to asking them to come for coffee.

Playgroup is nice but older DC is too old for it and it's at the time when he's not at nursery, I'm not sure how long I can take him there.

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 15:20:58

No dog!

Will check out online groups again

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut Tue 03-May-16 15:23:19

I want Tinder for friends. Something where you can swipe left or right without the angst and the painful discussions in a soft play.

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 15:36:09

Not familiar with Tinder but that sounds great!

BeaArthursUnderpants Tue 03-May-16 15:38:53

OP I've been in your position and I would love for friends! But in the meantime, I will offer bit of friendly advice from someone who's been there. It is exactly like dating, and like dating, it is a numbers game. The more people you meet, the more likely you will "click" with someone and find a real friendship. Do not be afraid to put yourself out there. Yes it's a bit awkward when you "ask someone out," but I've done it lots of times and it's almost always been very happily received. The other thing that really helps is consistency. It takes time to build a friendship and the more you see someone the easier it is to get to know her. So if you can put yourself in situations where you see the same people every week, or play at the same park every Thursday morning or whatever, you will develop casual acquaintances that can turn into friends. There really are tons of other moms out there who are feeling the same way, so don't be afraid to reach out!!

Sirona Tue 03-May-16 15:43:23

I've been to a few of the group meetups and met some nice people through it.

Yoksha Tue 03-May-16 15:47:26

I went onto mumsnet local and found someone who just wanted to meet for coffee, shopping etc. She was suffering from empty nest syndrome. I pm'd her, but alas, no response.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut Tue 03-May-16 16:23:36

The trouble with meet up is that where I am it's all proper activities and <David Brent tones> networking.

I want someone who wants to meet for 6 glasses of wine, a harty moan and is happy to chat about the utter crap I like. Must also have gsoh. Or who would like to browse around a market or go and catch a play at the theatre.

I do not want to sit through another painful play date with the kids making small talk about baby milestones/the merits or otherwise of attachment parenting/how much tax they pay and isn't it outrageous/the best way to iron a school jumper.

I want to go "ooh, she has describe herself as intolerant, impatient and snarky and her hobbies as drinking wine, eating out and moaning about the bloody kids. Favourite author: Margaret Atwood. Favourite vegetable: cucumber because it looks a bit rude and you can put it in your gin." Swipe right!

Blondie1984 Tue 03-May-16 16:26:36

Try - that's a good way to meet people

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 16:48:46

Had a quick look at meetup, it does seem like actual activities which is great but at the moment i'm sort of glued to my 10m old DS
Can't even have the luxury of a private shower so book clubs and the like are out of question

pimsandlemonade Tue 03-May-16 16:53:48


Your description is great! I'm several months (maybe years?) away from going to the theatre etc, but it soundsgreat.
Gin with cucumber and a moan sounds lovely!

I would like to meet someone with young kids so they could entertain themselves whilst we have chocolates and tea but not particularly keen to chat about baby stuff

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