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To have said he couldn't go?

(8 Posts)
Bocolatechiscuit Mon 02-May-16 16:01:15

My almost 10 year old has recently been allowed to go off to the park just up the road with friends. He has always been very reliable and good at letting me know where he is if I wouldn't be able to immediately see him when I open the front door etc and is always in on time. I started off by giving him 45 minutes to check he would be home on time from the park and have now extended it to 1.5 hours or so. He always has to have his phone charged and be contactable and knows I will go and collect him if I call him and he doesn't reply. No problems so far.

He has just called me now asking to go from there to another park somewhere else which I have never heard of. His friends came onto the phone to try to explain where it is and it's at least a 25 minute walk from our house. I said no. His phone has only 10% battery, he has no idea where the park is, it sounds way too far for my liking and these 'friends' have been known to disappear on him when another offer comes along (although not while they've been at the park away from our street). He is now going to talk to the others but may have to come home alone if the others decide to go anyway which I fear they will.

I've done the right thing haven't I? I just feel so sorry for him-he struggles with keeping friends as it is bless him due to some attachment issues he has and it's so hard to say no to him just when he's being accepted.

Gosh this parenting malarkey's hard!

SirChenjin Mon 02-May-16 16:03:17

YANBU. He's probably secretly very glad you've said no. I'm surprised that a group of 9/10 years old have as much freedom to roam as that tbh - and I'm fairly laid back in my parenting.

40somethingwonderful Mon 02-May-16 16:04:10

Yanbu I would've said the same.

LitteRedSparkle Mon 02-May-16 16:05:06

I'm in the YANBU camp, i wouldnt either

BertrandRussell Mon 02-May-16 16:08:54

Are you busy? Could you let him go but say you'll pick him up in an hour then go and park discreetly somewhere near the park concerned?

BertrandRussell Mon 02-May-16 16:09:39

Otherwise I'd probably say no, and I have been called lax to the point of irresponsibility on here before!

iamdivergent Mon 02-May-16 16:09:51


Bocolatechiscuit Mon 02-May-16 16:12:51

I can't go and park there. I don't have a car here to use and it's a 30 min walk by which time he'd be on his way back! I've just called him again and one of the boys has stayed with him at the closer park so he seems happy. Goodness they have no idea how much stress they cause do they? grin

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