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aren't*** MNHQ - title amended to RENT, which is what the OP wanted before her phone intervened***

(62 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

bettybear Mon 02-May-16 11:47:23

My 16 year old DS is doing an apprenticeship and is on more than the minimum rate for an apprentice his age. His take home pay monthly is £750 a month. He pays his own phone bill and contributes to the Sky and broadband as he has his own set up in his room. This morning we have had a discussion about how much rent he pays me weekly. I currently charge him £25 and he gets 3 meals a day, snacks, all his washing and ironing done, his room tidied and bed changed weekly. He has just told me that one of his friends pays £20 a month and another pays £30. These friends are at college but have part time jobs and actually don't warm a lot less than my DS monthly. He thinks I am being unreasonable to charge him £25 weekly but I think he's getting a great deal and would love to live somewhere for that amount and get everything done for me! He's currently saving up for driving lessons and a car and is as tight as a badgers bum when it comes to money but even after paying out his costs he is left with over £600 a month! AIBU???

bettybear Mon 02-May-16 11:48:08

Grrrrrr! Autocorrect! Title should say RENT! Sorry X

NeedACleverNN Mon 02-May-16 11:48:16

£25 a month?!

Can I live with you?

NeedACleverNN Mon 02-May-16 11:49:42

Sorry £25 a week is still good. That works out £100 a month and is a bargain for housekeeping and food

bettybear Mon 02-May-16 11:50:34

That's what I think too but he disagrees! I was actually considering raising it as he eats like a horse!

DoreenLethal Mon 02-May-16 11:51:03

No, 1/3 to you, 1/3 to save and 1/3 to spend. Or he can leave home, pay for his own living costs and see just how expensive it really is in the big wide world.

DoreenLethal Mon 02-May-16 11:51:34

That's what I think too but he disagrees!

Of course he disagrees!

Perhaps show him just what it actually costs to live in the real world?

NeedACleverNN Mon 02-May-16 11:51:41

Tell him no rent but he buys his own food, cooks it, cleans up afterwards and does all his washing.

ghostyslovesheep Mon 02-May-16 11:51:42

YANBU that's a tiny amount compared to earnings

£600 a month is a fair amount if he doesn't have to pay for anything other than his phone

Crisscrosscranky Mon 02-May-16 11:51:52

YANBU. Challenge him to find a better deal elsewhere...wink

FadedRed Mon 02-May-16 11:52:35

YABU. £50 a week and do his own laundry, ironing and tidying up. Your future DiL will thank you for teaching him to take care of himself. grin

SilverDragonfly1 Mon 02-May-16 11:52:36

£25 is more than fair. It's what we charge my son, based on the fact that he often eats at his girlfriend's! We do still subsidise him slightly at that rate, but are okay with that as he is just starting out.

Junosmum Mon 02-May-16 11:53:09

£25 weekly is a good deal for him.

He could choose to pay £30 a month but buy his own food. He'll soon realise what a good deal he is on.

And he should be doing his own washing ironing and changing his bed- at some point he'll move out and needs to be in a routine of ensuring he has regularly cleaned clothes (my DH would leave it and leave it as his mum always do it, I refused to do any of his washing until he got the routine. He went commando more than once!).

SilverDragonfly1 Mon 02-May-16 11:53:18

That included when he was an apprentice on £600 a month.

bettybear Mon 02-May-16 11:54:17

Thank you everyone. His friends parents are considerably better off then I am as well and when DS started his apprenticeship I lost all tax credits and child benefit so actually took a huge loss in income coming in. Can manage without the benefits but the £25 DS pays is MY little bit of spending money which more often then not I use for top up food shopping anyway!

KayTee87 Mon 02-May-16 11:55:17

When I was 16 my take home pay was about £650 a month, I gave my mum £200 of this. Did my own cleaning up etc.

CecilyP Mon 02-May-16 11:57:27

He is being extremely ureasonable. It's great to live at home when you are working so able to save for larger items, but he is getting a great deal as it is, so he should be very grateful. £20 a month is hardly worth bothering with. The other boys parents are actually worse off than when their kids were at school and they were getting child benefit.

liinyo Mon 02-May-16 11:57:57

We charge our DD 2%5 of her take home pay and she is expected to save quite a lot too. I buy staples and cook for her occasionally plus most of the laundry. She buys some of her own food and takes care of her own room and phone bill. . We don't need the money but think it is important for her to live as an adult/learn to budget/pay her way in the world etc etc .

SeriousCreativeBlock Mon 02-May-16 11:58:41

That's definitely a fair amount and very generous. You need to be careful otherwise yout might end up with a 22 year old still living at home, doing his laundry, buying his food, paying all his bills while he works full time and doesn't contribute a penny like DM does for my DB

liinyo Mon 02-May-16 11:59:03


52dietname Mon 02-May-16 12:00:15

Why are you doing all his cooking and cleaning etc?

When I was 20 I earnt £12k and paid £200 a month in rent. That was 13 years ago

dailymailphequers Mon 02-May-16 12:01:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thecitydoc Mon 02-May-16 12:03:01

the rule - take it or leave home - should be 1/3 rent, 1/3 savings 1/3 spending money. He should therefore be paying you £250 per month

52dietname Mon 02-May-16 12:03:25

Where does this third thing come from? Surely just charge the going rate to rent a room

I do happen to pay a third of my income on rent, but many of my friends pay half of that on a mortgage.

Toddzoid Mon 02-May-16 12:06:14

He should do his cooking and cleaning, buy all his own food and pay £30 a month rent.

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