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AIBU?

to think my work sickness record shouldn't include time off to care for sick children?

60 replies

Shamalamalam · 02/05/2016 09:19

I've had 3 incidents of sickness in a year so have to have a meeting tomorrow.

I've actually only had 3 days and only 1 of them was me, but they're considered to be separate incidents so I have to go and explain myself.

I've had 1 day with a d&v bug.

The week before last DD2 had a horrible bug - DH normally covers when the kids are off school sick as he can work from home, but he had a couple of things he couldn't miss so we shared it between us.

She was sent home early Monday - DH picked her up. I was at home with her Tuesday, DH did Wednesday and Thursday, I was off again with her on Friday. Because I went back in on the Weds and Thurs, they consider it to be 2 separate incidents even though it was the same illness

I get paid sick pay, but I don't get paid when off with the children.

I thought that type of emergency leave when dealing with sick children was different to my own sick leave but they've lumped it all together.

So, aibu to think it's been recorded incorrectly and that my sickness record shouldn't include unpaid leave to care for sick kids

Thanks!

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dementedpixie · 02/05/2016 09:23

No it shouldn't include time off to care for sick children and should be recorded differently.

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underrugsswept · 02/05/2016 09:23

It depends on the policy where you work. IIRC (it's going back a few years) when I was managing staff they could choose to take it as holiday, a defined period of emergency leave (1/2 paid, 1/2 unpaid) or unpaid (once EL ran out).

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underrugsswept · 02/05/2016 09:24

I don't recall any option for it to be counted as that staff member's sick leave though.

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DoreenLethal · 02/05/2016 09:25

Yes it should be considered Emergency leave not sick leave, after all you didn't fill in a sick form for it did you?

Can you get a copy of your contract/handbook etc and point this out to them at the start of the meeting? Failing that

www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants/your-rights

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dementedpixie · 02/05/2016 09:26

I would have thought you could opt to take annual leave or unpaid leave. Shouldn't be sick leave

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Littleorangecat · 02/05/2016 09:28

I didn't know they unpaid leave would class as your own sick leave,that seems unfair as you have not been paid for the days.
I've just taken a day off with my dd and opted to make the hours up over 2 weeks, rather than take holiday or unpaid would that be an option at your place of work?

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RJnomore1 · 02/05/2016 09:28

Are you sure it's a sick leave record and not an attendance record?

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Shamalamalam · 02/05/2016 09:29

Thanks! I've been Googling but couldn't find anything definitive about how it should be recorded.

There's nothing in my handbook other than emergency leave is unpaid and I need to let my manager know in good time.

I didn't have to fill in a sickness form, but then I didn't have to fill one in when I was sick either.

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BombadierFritz · 02/05/2016 09:31

If you told them it was your kids not you, you werent paid, then its not sick leave. You need to see their policies. Is it a fairly big company with an hr department?

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Shamalamalam · 02/05/2016 09:31

The letter talks about 'incidents of sickness' so I'm assuming it's sick leave rather than attendance.

But emergency leave is allowed by law isn't it? Can they give me a disciplinary for that?

Other than these 3 days, and my annual leave entitlement I haven't had any other time off

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BombadierFritz · 02/05/2016 09:32

What are their policies on the meeting after 3 absences?

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AnchorDownDeepBreath · 02/05/2016 09:33

I didn't think you could use emergency leave for dependants like that. Doesn't it allows you to leave to make other arrangements? So it would have counted on Monday when your husband had to leave to pick her up, but not Tuesday or Friday when you'd have been expected to make other arrangements (I don't know what, but I'm fairly sure that's how it used to be enforced).

I think they've probably put this down as an attendance thing too, but as most people's attendance is linked to their own sickness, they've just got sloppy with wording.

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BombadierFritz · 02/05/2016 09:34

You can also ask acas tomorrow

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wannabehippyandcrazycatlover · 02/05/2016 09:35

It will be an attendance meeting not a 'sick record' meeting.

If you are off work for any reason other than annual leave this will all be discussed.

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megletthesecond · 02/05/2016 09:35

Yanbu. If it's unpaid emergency time off to care for dependents I don't think that should go into your sickness record.

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TheoriginalLEM · 02/05/2016 09:36

3 days off and you need to explain yourself??? blimey.

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LIZS · 02/05/2016 09:37

Were you paid for those absences? Did you record it as your sickness or time off for dependents? My employer offers separate limits.

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BombadierFritz · 02/05/2016 09:38

I think wannabehippy is right. They can discuss your absence (and many employers would not let you take that much time off) but just make sure it is not recorded as sick leave.

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OllyBJolly · 02/05/2016 09:38

It's usually absence management not sick leave management. It's the absences that are the issue.

Your time off to look after your DC is not emergency leave; emergency leave is to organise care, not to give the care.

Unless your employer is particularly strict, then it won't be a disciplinary, just a counselling meeting.

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Alisvolatpropiis · 02/05/2016 09:38

It will be about how much time you have taken off with your children. And they've probably phrased it like that because it's a basic template letter.

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KP86 · 02/05/2016 09:39

This is seriously madness. I know that it's standard across the UK, but bloody hell. Disciplinary meetings for being ILL?? Who the hell can help if/when they get sick? I've had an on again, off again cold/bug for the past three months and I'm convinced one reason why I can't completely shake it is because everyone around me is also fighting a bug because they aren't allowed to stay at home and get better!

It is insanity and a completely ridiculous policy for a supposedly modern country.

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Caravanoflove · 02/05/2016 09:40

This seems harsh, I'm guessing you work on the NHS?!

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BombadierFritz · 02/05/2016 09:40

Oh sorry i misread that as you had 3 days off all in one go. Bad luck on the '3 incidents' thing!

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Shamalamalam · 02/05/2016 09:41

From the link above

If your child falls ill you could take time off to go to the doctor and make care arrangements. Your employer may then ask you to take annual leave or parental leave if you want to look after your child for longer.

I always assumed that last sentence to mean that I can have more time off but it would be recorded as unpaid/annual/parental leave

After 3 sickness episodes I have a 'back to work meeting' with HR and Occupational Health which can lead to disciplinary action.

My boss is actually really nice and I'm sure it won't go further, but I don't plan on staying there much longer and I don't really want disciplinaries/warnings on my record

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KP86 · 02/05/2016 09:41

My question would be, what do they expect me to do with my DC when they are sick? I don't have anyone who could take him so that I'm able to go work.

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