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to wonder where the 'Have I been stood up' thread has gone?

(88 Posts)
PollyPerky Mon 02-May-16 07:59:51

Has it been taken down?

LemonRedwood Mon 02-May-16 08:04:47

Yes, deleted. Message said some of the posts were quite harsh and looking behind the scenes OP wasn't all she seemed either.

PollyPerky Mon 02-May-16 08:07:43

Disappointing. I PMd her a supportive couple of messages at first when she was having a hard time on the thread, and she totally ignored. Even a one word 'Thanks' would have been nice.

BathshebaDarkstone Mon 02-May-16 08:10:01

I know, do you ever think, "why the fuck did I bother?"

MadHattersChaiParty Mon 02-May-16 08:20:39

I still have a bad taste from the thread. Even if OP turned out not to be legit I hope it doesn't encourage certain posters to think their behaviour and comments towards her were appropriate. I really despaired at some of them confused

PollyPerky Mon 02-May-16 08:26:31

I can see it from both sides Mad. But yes, Bathsheba.

There was clearly a lot of frustration from posters who had given up time on their Sunday to try to offer some support. The OP was a bit obtuse to put it mildly and did seem to be teasing when she came back. It's easy to see how emotions escalated.

Most posters do try to be supportive and fair but when someone's stonewalling then it can turn nasty.

I wish I'd not wasted my time adding to her thread and PMing her with some kind words- but that's anon forums for you- there are always going to be odd bods around I suppose.

JenniferYellowShat Mon 02-May-16 08:35:52

I've PM'd people messages of support before, when they've had a hard time and I get nothing back.

I don't bother now.

I was supportive of the OP in the thread you are talking about but she did start appearing a little bit twat-like towards the end, I must admit....

CaptainCrunch Mon 02-May-16 08:37:39

This will get deleted as well probably because it's a TAAT. It was obvious to me that the op was a goady troll. One of my posts was deleted because I had pointed that out and the op got all sanctimonious about being attacked and comments being deleted not being hers etc. Then all the "hugs and huns" cohort turned up.

The op did a fantastic job of creating a nasty bunfight which was clearly her intention all along.

I was delighted with the deletion message, proved 100% correct.

LagunaBubbles Mon 02-May-16 08:38:31

I never saw the end, the last posts were folk wondering if she had got on the train. What did she say when she came back?

MattDillonsPants Mon 02-May-16 08:38:48

Polly let's not get it twisted..."given up time on their Sundays"? Really? This site is entertainment...not The Samaritans.

DoesFlossfloss Mon 02-May-16 08:39:40

On the rare occasions I've PM'd someone I've always had a reply. The only time I didnt, Ilater suspected a troll. This place is heaving with them.

springtimevintagedream Mon 02-May-16 08:39:53

Personally if I was getting an unwarranted hard time on a thread i would prefer to get a message on the thread saying as much. I didn't really read the thread you mean.

WellErrr Mon 02-May-16 08:40:50

I still have a bad taste from the thread. Even if OP turned out not to be legit I hope it doesn't encourage certain posters to think their behaviour and comments towards her were appropriate. I really despaired at some of them

Totally agree.

PollyPerky Mon 02-May-16 08:45:50

Matt. Entertainment? Hmm- that's subjective. Depends on what you define as entertainment.

People do give up time to try to help posters. You might regard it as entertainment, but that's not how I see it. Many posters put time and effort into carefully worded posts when someone's asking for help.

That poster asked for help. People tried to give it.

DixieNormas Mon 02-May-16 08:46:15

Reading some of the comments they were getting at the beginning I don't think I'd have bothered with an up date either

daisychain01 Mon 02-May-16 09:25:03

That thread was ridiculous, clearly posters had way too much time on their hands if they were prepared to waste a whole afternoon posting "oh come on OP tell us if you turned up on the date. Did you catch the train? " on and on. The poster was hardly in distress, it was a stupid OLD thread hardly life or death!

People should have just moved on and not been sucked in.

daisychain01 Mon 02-May-16 09:27:45

Sorry Polly you are massively overstating the carefully worded posts, their words were no more careful than us posting here.

PaulAnkaTheDog Mon 02-May-16 09:30:26

It was a pile of nonsense and painfully obvious from yesterday evening's installment that she was deliberately giady, evasive and had a whiff of troll. That was when it got properly bad. Fair enough really, she was being a dick.

MattDillonsPants Mon 02-May-16 09:34:19

Polly of course people put thought into their replies in the main....but it IS entertainment.

Entertainment is being diverted, amused etc. That's what MN does. It also educates...but that's not something separate to entertainment generally.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Mon 02-May-16 10:04:22

Agree with MattDillon, some posters really think their presence on this board is akin to providing a counselling service. It isn't.

People post for diversion, entertainment, distraction, any number of reasons. If they all posted to actually help then there wouldn't be unanswered threads that aren't so juicy, would there? There are.

I posted on that thread mostly to make a point about the pompous pedants that can't resist pointing out commas and grammar in the wrong place.

I felt very much more sorry for the other OP whose thread was deleted because she likely felt attacked about having her posts pulled apart by said arseholes, albeit standard deletion message about protecting privacy.

PollyPerky Mon 02-May-16 10:08:05

I think we are going to have to agree to disagree on this Matt. You may regard it as 'entertainment'. That's fine if that is what it is for you.

Other people (and I have friends who are Samaritans by the way) take some of the threads where help is being asked for more seriously. Certainly on the Relationships forum, lives have actually been saved by support for women who were suicidal or living with abusing and violent partners. I think there is a documented case of someone who'd overdosed( and posted) and as a result of MN intervention was saved.

So what's entertainment for you is something very different for others.

PaulAnkaTheDog Mon 02-May-16 10:08:19

What thread was that LyingWitch?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Mon 02-May-16 10:17:22

PaulAnka, the one where the OP's friend was proposing to her other friend and OP was so excited for them, she was wondering why there hadn't been an update from one/both.

She was literally fizzing over with happiness and excitement... and got her arse handed to her by bullish, nasty posters along with some twats who came on just to critique her mastery of English punctuation.

It was OP's first post.

PaulAnkaTheDog Mon 02-May-16 10:21:16

I saw the beginning of it and people were being a bit dickish. That's a shame, she was just excited for her friends!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Mon 02-May-16 10:21:24

Polly I think you're being quite disingenuous. If you had posted on the thread you're talking about, you would have got the deletion message the same as the rest of us. You obviously didn't. So how exactly were you 'helping' the OP there?

As it was, they're probably a troll so it didn't matter but in all seriousness, you refer to the 'relationships' board (I post there too) - yet you're enquiring about an AIBU thread whilst you're on AIBU and referring to your Samaritan friends.

AIBU is not really a serious board, is it? Posters who stumble onto it and post serious topics are quickly directed elsewhere. Let's not pretend that you're being altruistic giving up your time on this one.

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