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To not be able to choose who comes to my graduation?

(24 Posts)
BlueRaptor Sat 30-Apr-16 15:39:16

My graduation isn't until January next year, but I've just found out that we only get two tickets per person. I went to uni a little later than all my friends, and when they all graduated they just had their parents go.

However, DP (who will be DH by then!) really wants to come, but so do my parents! My parents are fantastic, but have not been particularly involved in me going to uni and didn't see it as that big a deal (I was really chuffed with myself choosing to go after not going at 18 like everyone else!) however DP has always made it clear he's really proud of it.

I couldn't possibly choose between my parents as to which one to have, but if I have both then DP doesn't get a ticket.

AIBU to have none of them instead and just do a meal after?

BlueRaptor Sat 30-Apr-16 15:40:45

...and just seen the thread from the other point of view of this, bad timing! Woops!

Gileswithachainsaw Sat 30-Apr-16 15:44:45

I've read both threads. I think your soon to he dh should go. he sounds so proud and supportive and I really think he should go.

but I'd ask.if there's any chance of any extra tickets.

what a shitty decision to have to make though

BillSykesDog Sat 30-Apr-16 15:46:26

You say he has supported you through your degree whilst your partner has. So I'd say it was a no brainer (especially if it includes financially). Give one to DP and tell them that there is one ticket available and to sort it out between them who comes.

Vixxfacee Sat 30-Apr-16 15:46:42

I thought this was the partner of the op of the other thread trying to get opinions.

Take your partner. But people often sell or give away tickets for graduation. Not everyone needs or wants 2.

NannawifeofBaldr Sat 30-Apr-16 15:48:37

Take your DH.

Ask your parents to choose which one most wants to attend and ask the Uni if there's a waiting list for extra tickets.

BlueRaptor Sat 30-Apr-16 15:49:55

Ha, I'm not the other threads partner I swear! Just a coincidence of timing I think.

I just worry about my parents reaction - yes DP has been more supportive in regards to my degree but my parents are great, really supportive people. They're paying for a significant part of our wedding and have helped us while we were moving etc so really worry that I'll upset them if they can't both go.

Vixxfacee Sat 30-Apr-16 15:50:42

Send an email out to your class and find out if anyone has any spare.

Snowberry86 Sat 30-Apr-16 15:51:06

At most uni's there are extra tickets available nearer the time to buy.

notinagreatplace Sat 30-Apr-16 15:52:01

If you have a brother or a sister, could you take them instead of your parents and then meet up with your parents for dinner?

chunkymum1 Sat 30-Apr-16 15:55:31

I think your DH should definitely go. I suggest you ask about spare tickets though (but be aware they may not be available until closer to the time so you'll need to prepare someone for the fact that they may not get one. We did this for DH's graduation and managed to get enough for me, MIL and our DC to attend- but the fall back was always that I would go and we'd meet up with the others after for a nice dinner if we didn't get enough tickets.

muminthecity Sat 30-Apr-16 16:05:23

When my sister graduated she gave the two tickets to our parents, but her DP and I went along too, in the hope that there would be spare tickets available. If not, we were planning to go for a drink and meet them all afterwards. Luckily, there were enough tickets available for us all. Would this be an option for you?

BoffinMum Sat 30-Apr-16 16:07:54

I think ask the university to make an exception for you - they often do.

99percentchocolate Sat 30-Apr-16 16:08:35

Definitely ask if you can get spare tickets - my dsis was given two tickets but managed to buy another 2 spare as well.

Out2pasture Sat 30-Apr-16 16:10:11

I think one for your partner, one to your parents while you try to source a third ticket is brilliant.
If your parents have attended one of these ceremonies you may be surprised they might not be as disappointed to not attend as you may think. I attended 2 out of my 3. Third "child" didn't want to attend is own ;)

tinyterrors Sat 30-Apr-16 17:07:35

Ask the uni if there are any spare tickets. There are usually spare tickets for those who want/need them as there will be some graduating with one or no guests going.

If you can't get a spare ticket then take your dp and let your parents decide who goes. It's your dp who has been the most supportive.

Ilovelearning Sat 30-Apr-16 22:15:26

We only got 2 tickets for DD graduation, but a room was made available for anyone else who couldn't get tickets to watch it on a big screen. Not quite the same, but a compromise, as DD has 2 sisters and a boyfriend who wanted to attend.

jellybeans Sat 30-Apr-16 22:26:06

I think parents. But most allow extra tickets don't they? I had 4 pepole. There is usually a reserve ticket list.

GottaGetThisDone Sat 30-Apr-16 22:30:25

I went to uni late in life too, and when i graduated I had a DP, 4 DC, DM & DF. All of whom had supported me beyond anything and I so wanted them all to be there. We were allowed 2 tickets initially but were told they MAY be extra tickets available once everyone had claimed their 2 allocated. I was very lucky and i managed to buy an extra 5 - cost me a fortune but so worth it. If i hadn't been able to then it would have been DH as he bore the brunt of the stress of the course, but the others would have waited outside to see me and get photos done
Will your uni have spare ticket allocation?

Moonlightceleste Sat 30-Apr-16 22:34:28

When DP got her PhD I went to the ceremony and we celebrated later with her parents. DP didn't want to choose between her parents and decided they had both been at her first graduation so they could celebrate with us later. Both of them were absolutely fine about it.

cbear000 Sat 30-Apr-16 22:48:33

Most uni's have a ballot for extra tickets, or at least some to purchase, and often extra tv hookups for people without seats. I think your husband to be should definitely go, and if you can't get another ticket tell your parents you only have 1 other seat and let them decide amongst themselves. If you can't get any access for a 3rd person, just have your DP there and invite your parents for the celebration after.

Bunnyjo Sat 30-Apr-16 22:57:43

My graduation is in July. I have 2 DC as well as DParents and DH. We are only given 2 tickets to the graduation ceremony, but are given the opportunity to purchase additional tickets (only a maximum of another 2). I have managed to purchase another 2 tickets, and my DC and DParents will be going - DH is self-employed and he cannot get the time off, so this is actually the best outcome.

Most universities will have additional tickets available, so you may well be able to get more tickets. Good luck!

LittleCandle Sat 30-Apr-16 23:08:19

Tricky one. DD2 graduates next summer and XH is already trying to muscle in on it, even though he has given her not a penny piece in financial support and when asked about it told her that as she chose to go to university, she could bloody well pay for it herself! She has already asked myself and my friend to go to it and doesn't want to even ask if there are spare tickets because she doesn't want him to go. She also doesn't want to say that to him directly, as she lives in the vain hope that one day he might have some time to spare for her. My heart aches for her, although my friend has already assured DD that there is no problem if she wants her father to go. For background, friend and I pooled our resources when we both separated and divorced about the same time and she inherited DD2 at the height of the ghastly teen stage! She deserves a medal Friend has stepped up to the plate of her own accord to help DD at times when I might not have been available to talk, or when she didn't want to tell me something in case my feelings were hurt (usually relating to XH) DD values her greatly.

Do ask your university. There are usually spare tickets around.

carefreeeee Sun 01-May-16 00:04:13

You can usually get an extra ticket so don't panic yet

I have the opposite problem as I don't want to go to mine (4th degree and the novelty has worn off) but my mum is saying it's not fair and she's already bought an outfit!

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