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AIBU to be pissed off by this comment?

(73 Posts)
toolonglurking Wed 27-Apr-16 15:39:01

I had a baby three weeks ago, my first. MIL (who is staying for a week) has just shrieked ' My goodness girl, haven't you got an appetite! You better not weigh yourself for a while!' because I ate the last slice of banana loaf.
I want to tell her to fuck off, but realise I'm probably being touchy because I'm tired.
Do I need to just let it go, and if yes, then can someone please tell me how to?

NeedACleverNN Wed 27-Apr-16 15:42:13


Your mil needs a lesson in manners

KindDogsTail Wed 27-Apr-16 15:46:26

You are not being unreasonable, but don't say anything. She sounds tactless and probably whatever you say she will miss the point in some way.

If you are breast feeding it is so important to eat enough anyway.

You need a lot of energy with a new born baby.

VimFuego101 Wed 27-Apr-16 15:48:57

You've just had a baby. Eat as much cake as you want and do whatever you need to do to muddle through with everything. And we will give you an alibi if you kill your MIL and bury her under the patio.

ImperialBlether Wed 27-Apr-16 15:49:42

She's very rude. Did she want to eat it instead? Immediately after having a baby you need to make sure you eat enough and you need to get as much peace as you can - seems like you can't do either as long as she's there.

ImperialBlether Wed 27-Apr-16 15:51:09

I think "Don't tell me what to eat in my own home" wouldn't be inappropriate.

WhatchaMaCalllit Wed 27-Apr-16 15:51:42

Congratulations on your new baby!

Say back at mil - "My goodness MIL, haven't you found your manners yet? I'm hungry, I've just had a baby and yes I do have an appetite!" and walk out of the room bringing your newborn baby with you smile

Pinkheart5915 Wed 27-Apr-16 15:52:57

She could do with learning some manners.
You had a baby three weeks ago if you want a slice of cake you go ahead and have it there is far too much pressure on new mums to diet straight away.
You needs lots of energy/food with a new born especially if you are breastfeeding.

BarbaraofSeville Wed 27-Apr-16 15:53:12

There is a face for comments like that. It looks like this hmm.

ImperialBlether Wed 27-Apr-16 15:53:50

Banana loaf is practically one of your five a day, anyway!

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Wed 27-Apr-16 15:54:16

Yanbu, I would've gone off the deep end if my MIL said anything similar, but then I couldn't cope with them for a week either so you're a better person than I am already! Deep breath and let it go, if she says anything else you can either ignore her or burst into tears and make her feel bad grin

Lumpylumperson Wed 27-Apr-16 15:54:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhatsYourDamage Wed 27-Apr-16 15:55:01

Your mil needs to stfu. I lived off cake when my first was a newborn.

oldlaundbooth Wed 27-Apr-16 15:55:36


When I was stuffing my face with Christmas Cake this last Christmas (because there wasn't really anything else decent to eat actually) PIL made such a face and said 'More cake, Old?!'.

I nearly said 'If you'd provide decent food for people at Christmas instead of this shite you're offering I wouldn't have to resort to eating wedges of Christmas cake, would I now, hmmmmm?'

But I didn't.

More fool me.

oldlaundbooth Wed 27-Apr-16 15:57:17

'MIL (who is staying for a week) '


You won't be doing that again will you!? grin

FancyPuffin Wed 27-Apr-16 15:57:35

God, I ate everything when I was post birth and now

If MIL says it again, fix her with a stare and say

'Yep, stand still too long and I'll fucking eat you as well'

Then slowly and purposely ram food into mouth.


CigarsofthePharoahs Wed 27-Apr-16 15:58:18

Master a good eye roll.
I swear I managed to keep up the breastfeeding for as long as I did by the sheer amount of cake I ate. It probably came out vanilla sponge flavour. grin
Congratulations on your new arrival. Eat what ever you feel like.

Badders123 Wed 27-Apr-16 16:03:07

You MUST say what puffin suggested!!

ImperialBlether Wed 27-Apr-16 16:06:53

Or say, "Go back to your book, MIL. What is it you're reading now? "The Guest from Hell" or "How to get your son divorced in a month"?

ThumbWitchesAbroad Wed 27-Apr-16 16:08:51

Love Puffin's response! Except probably not the most diplomatic grin

Are you breastfeeding? If so, then the correct response is "I need 500 extra calories a day to feed your grandchild so fuck off "

If you're not, then "I've just been growing a baby for 9m and expelled it from my body - I need to regain my strength now fuck off "

Or you could just tell her to fuck off and mind her own business.

Oh dearie me, none of my responses seem very diplomatic either, do they... wink

Alasalas2 Wed 27-Apr-16 16:14:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EweAreHere Wed 27-Apr-16 16:20:48


And you are waaaaay nicer than me ... I would have told her to get the hell out.

And believe me, my DH would be all over her poor behaviour and making sure an apology was forthcoming.

pigsDOfly Wed 27-Apr-16 16:21:43

She sounds delightful hmm

I don't get this thing with ILs, or anyone else for that matter, coming to stay when someone's just had a baby. Surely the last thing you want when you're trying to bond with your new baby and learn how to do all these new things is someone else hanging around making unhelpful comments?

Would have driven me nuts.

Just keep holding on to the thought that she'll be gone soon and how good that'll feel.

DerelictMyBalls Wed 27-Apr-16 16:22:29

What a beehatch. Stuff your face all you like, girl - you have just created an entire human!

Congratulations on your new baby flowers

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams Wed 27-Apr-16 16:27:10

Just say

"If it's bothering you then do feel free to leave at any time"
"Do fuck off to the far side of fuck"
"I. Beg. Your. Pardon. ?"

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