My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To ask if any of you have reinvited yourself?

30 replies

spad · 26/04/2016 20:36

I am fat and fed up of slobbing around in baggy clothes and looking and feeling worn out.

Have any of you been like this and totally reinvented yourself?

What was your lightbulb motivation moment and what was the best thing about your reinvention?

tia

OP posts:
Report
CheerfulYank · 26/04/2016 20:37

I haven't but I'd like to!

Report
EatShitDerek · 26/04/2016 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ilovesooty · 26/04/2016 20:47

I had a tattoo and a nose piercing after I left my ex .

Recovered from a breakdown, built a new career, retrained and set up self employment as well.

Report
spad · 26/04/2016 20:49

Fixing the outside to fix the inside sounds like a good idea. Any other stories? I need inspiration.

OP posts:
Report
gamerchick · 26/04/2016 20:50

I got a Fitbit. Those things are strict man and I've found I am competitive during challenges.

Report
EatShitDerek · 26/04/2016 20:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 26/04/2016 20:54

Hearing the Dancing In The Dark line 'I wanna change my clothes, my hair, my face…' and looking at myself and just felt that I had to change something.

Bought trainers that day, went for a run, came home and that same night, set up an online company to begin my second career.

Report
Ladycrazycat · 26/04/2016 20:54

When I'm wanting to feel more confident and happy about myself I find buying myself a few nice make up products helps. I know that sounds incredibly superficial but it does help my confidence if I have nice foundation on!

Report
Ladycrazycat · 26/04/2016 20:56

If you want to do more excercise, I found starting of doing it in the house worked well for me. It'll sound silly but jogging in the spot with my Fitbit helped me work up to a proper jog. Also YouTube yoga videos helped me too!

When it came to actually doing this stuff in public, having comfy trainers be clothes helped too!

Report
OohMrDarcy · 26/04/2016 20:57

I reinvented myself too - started 6 months or so after I ended my marriage.

At that point I was extremely overweight (BMI 42). hair not been cut in 18 months and had lost whatever sense of style I used to have over the years and 2 DC.

I started with a hair cut, followed by a babyliss big hair. Meant I felt better every day.

Next step was getting advice on S&B board on basic makeup essentials that made me feel more done.

Started getting eyebrows threaded, started 5:2 last September, have since lost over 3.5 stone and as I've had to bin too big clothes I've bought new ones which suit me better.

I am literally a different person to a year ago and I feel much more confident, more like the old me.

Good luck!

Report
Uncoping · 26/04/2016 20:59

I did!
After I had my DD I was in a horrible, horrible rut. I had severe PND, I had put on so much weight (growing up with fat-shaming, image conscious parents left a huge mark on me) I was always wearing the same awful clothes... I can't actually pin point my light bulb moment, I was just fed up of being fat and looking fat and depending on food... Being overweight stopped me doing everything! I didn't go out, I didn't buy nice clothes, never treated myself to any kind of 'girly' treatment as I was too embarrassed to walk into a salon.
I ended up just having enough of it all, I was at my lowest ebb and I started going to an exercise class, healthy eating soon followed, I lost 2.5st (still have 2 to go) and I got my hair cut/coloured and started wearing clothes I loved! I've always been a bit gothy and when I was fat I had 0 confidence to pull it off but now I'm rocking it & feeling confident!

It's unfortunate I couldn't gather up the confidence when I was bigger (I was only a size 16/18 to be fair...) but as I mentioned above my parents have somehow left me with the mindset that skinny = happy and that's exactly how I am. I'm only really happy when I'm losing weight and don't feel "fat".

Report
misscph1973 · 26/04/2016 21:04

It's spring. We all want new shoes ;)

I did reinvent myself as a young teenager. I was spotty and had glasses and I was bullied (not much, but enough to make me stop smiling). After some years we moved, but it wasn't much different in the new school. Eventually and not very consciously I went "fake it till you make it", I started smiling again, I grew my hair, got smarter glasses and got rid of the baggy jumpers. I ditched a couple of "friends". It worked, I became much more proactive socially and in school. I learned that no one else can do it for you, you are the only one who can change you.

I am now 43 and I still a big believer of "fake it till you make it", but I do have to remind myself sometimes. Recently I have had to admit that I have put on weight, even if the scales show the same as when I was 19, it's just redistributed (gravity). I had convinced myself that it's the shops that have changed the way sizes work. So I have started IF (intermittent fasting, like 5:2, just no calorie counting) and I am lifting weights and got a rebounder. And I am going to be ready for that bikini!

Something else I have started that works really well is that I write down 3 positive things at the end of every day. I use Evernote on my phone and it takes 2 min. It's working, I am seeing the positive everywhere. I had to do something after Bowie and now Prince died.

Report
ZigZagIntoTheBlue · 26/04/2016 21:07

I'm about to return to work after mat leave and feeling the same. I got a voucher for Christmas that I've been saving to buy some new work clothes, at home I go for comfort which with two dc makes sense to me but I don't want to be the frumpy mum back at work. I need to lose more weight though first! I think the threading, make up, clothes etc helps give you a kick up the arse to make the bigger changes. Good luck with your journey Smile

Report
SurroMummy13 · 26/04/2016 21:15

Will check in later X

Report
ElviraCondomine · 26/04/2016 21:15

I've started wearing the clothes I like rather than the clothes I 'ought' to wear.
I've lost nearly 5 stone
I've taken up exercise
I've changed jobs (well actually that was the catalyst for the whole reinvention)
I've started wearing make up and jewellery (before I felt fat and frumpy and couldn't be bothered)
I've gone on courses through work and used the new skills to take on new and exciting projects (all still in the planning stage and will require a bloody big time investment next year but should pay off in terms of career development)
I've started setting myself daily, weekly, monthly and long term goals.

I'm still fat, the house is tidier and cleaner but still not pristine, I don't get enough time with my DH, I don't see my friends very often, (I don't have many friends) and I'm still plagued by self doubt. I wouldn't say I'm happier exactly, but I have a sense of purpose, more of a feeling of being in control, and I'm more optimistic.

Report
SunshineBee · 26/04/2016 21:25

I'm kind of trying to do it at the moment. I had a dead end job before (unexpectedly) falling pregnant with dd, who is now 2. I became a SAHM and was quite isolated and unhappy. We moved to a new area and I made some friends for the first time in many years, lost 3st (another 2 to go!) and I am starting college in September and hopefully university next year. I have recently bought some new bits of clothes and it's all stuff I always felt too frumpy to wear, and I feel amazing in them. I've also started making much more of an effort with my hair and makeup and I feel so much better for it. It's not a massive re-invention but I feel like 'me' again after losing myself a long time ago. Small changes will make a big difference. Good luck OP.

Report
AIBVVVU · 26/04/2016 21:36

Small steps. A little treat for me everyday, even if it's just putting the expensive bubble bath in. Taking care of yourself and loving yourself is the first step. When you love yourself you want the best for yourself. That goes to food, where you live, who you have in your life and what you spend your time doing.
I went from an unqualified 12 stone slob who drank and did drugs and sofa surfed to a 9.5 stone professional with a home, a husband and a family. I work, I exercise, I study and I enjoy my family, my home and my life. It really did all start with me waking up one morning and thinking 'this is my who I am and not what I want to be'. I decided what would make me feel good that day, and did it.

Report
vanillaessence04 · 26/04/2016 22:48

I started getting back care and orthotics so I could exercise without pain.

Report
vanillaessence04 · 26/04/2016 22:49

another tip is to get a new bra, properly fitted at Debenhams or whatever. i.e. you could look "bigger" than you are if bra not right for you.

Report
VioletVaccine · 26/04/2016 23:51

Hi OP, i did!! Smile

I took a long hard look at myself, and actually thought (as the Mad Hatter said to Alice) "You've lost your muchness" please don't laugh at that!

I was tired, felt old and drained, and gave myself a good talking to, had a good cry and swore I would not be the same in a years time. I used to love company and socialising, and then just fell into the same boring routine that zapped me of any enthusiasm, pride in my appearance and piled on weight, which in turn meant I didn't feel like me anymore. My skirts and dresses got relegated to a suitcase gradually, until I was in jeans and trainers with my hair scraped back every day, little things can have a snowball effect.
If you look in the mirror and don't like what is staring back at you, then work on finding ways to change it one bit at a time. I didn't try to do everything at once, it would have been overwhelming and I'd have just given up again
I made a list of things that were achievable in a month, for me, that was hair dye, a few treats for my skin, and started drinking lots of water. I took an hour a day for just me, and didn't feel guilty about it. Then thought about what I could do in 6 months (drop weight and get fitter). Then what could I do in a year (at least know what I want to do when my youngest started school, and work towards it).
I wrote an eating plan that I'd be able to could keep to, and rewarded losses with a couple of items of clothing that I felt like me in again. And got out my suitcase of skirts and dresses too.

Over the course of 6 months I went from a size 16 to a 10 healthily, started to pick up the phone and arrange to meet up with people I'd put off calling (because I was embarrassed by how much I had got myself in a rut), and enrolled in online learning courses that I'd also put off doing because I'd had a defeatist attitude that matched my outlook then.
If you want it enough, you can and will do it, good luck OP! x

To ask if any of you have reinvited yourself?
Report
miraclebabyplease · 27/04/2016 01:34

I am trying to now.

Report
sunnyoutside · 27/04/2016 05:07

'Wow these posts are inspiring! I need to do this. ~I am 40 this year and totally stuck in a rut. I'm a single mum of 4 with little spare money though. Did it cost you all £££? What are your top tips?

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

HicDraconis · 27/04/2016 05:52

I turned 40 and decided to lose weight, get fitter and improve my self confidence - I took up karate. Was one of the best things I've ever done. I have lost weight, toned up, feel much more confident both in work and out of it, plus I know that if it came to it I could kick someone's arse with ease :)

I got my brown belt a few weeks ago. One more year to black tip and then 2 more years to black. I am also a big believer in "fake it till you make it" but after faking it for a while it stops being fake and becomes a lot more real. The hardest part of it was making the initial decision to do something about my lack of fitness and follow it through - once I'd started, sticking to the regular training was easy.

Report
curren · 27/04/2016 06:47

I do without meaning to. I did want to lose weight. But everything else followed.

I lost weight, then decided felt better and started taking more interest in myself and how I looked. Rather than avoiding mirrors. Got a new hair do. Started faffing with a make up a bit. Changed my clothes and bought what I liked rather than what I could get to fit.

Eventually I got enough confidence to start a new hobby. That gave me more confidence, more weight came off.

People say losing weight doesn't solve your problems. It does if it's your weight that's the problem. I was so down about how I looked and felt about my weight, it held me back doing anything I liked.

Losing weight won't solve deeper problems. But I feel so much better overall I feel I can handle to other stuff.

Report
penguinplease · 27/04/2016 07:01

Yes I have, in two years I went from fat to thin, black hair to very blonde and miserable to happy.
It did coincide nicely with getting rid of a shit shit man!

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.