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To reject this party invite?

(17 Posts)
Ohsotired123 Mon 25-Apr-16 15:55:17

My partner and I have been invited to our friends uncles 75th birthday. I have no idea why to be honest, we've both never met his uncle!

Anyway his cousin who is young and attractive is going. When I was very heavily pregnant i went for a drink with these people until quite late at night. I left as I couldn't drink and was tired and my partner stayed out with our friend, his wife and their cousin and they all went for a sit in Chinese. When I went to pick him up later that night, well morning, he was really funny with me and quiet. The following day he told me how the cousin had come on to him in the Chinese restaurant. He said she was rubbing his leg under the table and sticking her foot up near his crotch but not on it. He said he moved it away and was annoyed about the whole thing but stayed there. He said she was absolutely smashed, blind drunk. She was well on her way when I was there.

Anyway, I said I don't want to go to this party as she's going to be there. He's saying don't be silly she was drunk she didn't know what she was doing. But that's not the point to me! It will be awkward for me and he isn't getting that.

allegretto Mon 25-Apr-16 15:57:42

I wouldn't go to the party of someone I'd never met full stop.

flingingmelon Mon 25-Apr-16 15:57:42

Hopefully she will be mortified at the sight of the two of you and keep her distance. Is there any reason to think that wouldn't be the case?

Ameliablue Mon 25-Apr-16 15:59:24

Personally, I wouldn't decline an invite for that reason, however, if you don't know the guest of honour and you don't want to go, that's reason enough to decline.

TheSuspiciousMsWhicher Mon 25-Apr-16 16:02:35

Why would you go to the birthday party of someone you've never met? Particularly a big one like a 75th.

All the stuff with the cousin aside, I wouldn't accept this invitation.

Ohsotired123 Mon 25-Apr-16 16:03:13

Well I've had a drink with her before, before I got pregnant and we got on very well. We kind of spoke o Facebook and things and if I saw her out and about we would stop and chat. I wouldn't have considered her a friend though.

He's since wished her happy birthday on Facebook and stuff so is acting completely normal towards her although he hasn't seen her because they wernt mates! But if I see her again I'm worried I won't be able to act normal I feel she mugged me off! Even though she was blind drunk it's not the point. My partners already said we would go to our friend snd doesn't see how we can back out of it. They also live in the same culisac as us so we can't lie and say we are out!

lougle Mon 25-Apr-16 16:07:55

I wouldn't decline on that basis. Just stay away from her.

crispytruffle Mon 25-Apr-16 16:31:59

I wouldn't go to someone's party I didn't know. Perhaps your husband wants to go in the hope of this cousin trying it on again? I'd stay far away.

stiffstink Mon 25-Apr-16 16:35:39

How exactly have you been invited to this party and by whom?

ExtraHotLatteToGo Mon 25-Apr-16 16:35:50

Go out, then it's not a lie.

I'd find it far too difficult not to tell her what I thought of her antics.. Tell your DH you won't be able to resist it, I'm sure he'll quickly change his tune about saying no. Easy enough to say when he told you about it you reminded him you were already going out that night.

As for your DH, what's he doing encouraging her? FGS.

SmallBee Mon 25-Apr-16 16:39:11

YANBU to not want to go.

However if you do end up going and having to speak to her, I'd make a point of saying in a jokey fashion ' hope you aren't getting really drunk tonight. Last time we saw you, you got so smashed you ended up trying to feel up DH in the restaurant! That must have been embarrassing the next morning. '
Which sort of let's her know you're willing to laugh it off, THIS time, but that you and your DH talk, aren't idiots and won't tolerate it again. But without having to be to confrontational.

Goingtobeawesome Mon 25-Apr-16 16:39:49

She's invited you both as she wants a repeat attempt at getting into his bed.

He's enjoying the attention from her and your jealousy.

HTH.

CandyFlossBrain Mon 25-Apr-16 16:43:10

Well,you could just go out for the evening? Get dressed up and go to the cinema a town away!

KitKat1985 Mon 25-Apr-16 16:58:35

I'm not sure why anyone would want to go to a strangers 75th birthday anyway.

I'd question why he'd want to go either to be honest. Are you sure he isn't at all interested in her?

TiggerPiggerPoohBumWee Mon 25-Apr-16 17:00:38

I don't see why it should be awkward for YOU. Awkward for her, yes. Awkward for him, definitely. But you? You weren't the one being felt up or doing the inappropriateness, you weren't even there. Why would it be awkward for you?

GnomeDePlume Mon 25-Apr-16 17:24:28

If she was that drunk then it is quite possible she has no real recollection of the event. Alternatively this may be something she cringes over every time she has a flashback.

or am I the only person on MN who has done really stupid things while drunk and cringes over them when I get a flashback?

Lilaclily Mon 25-Apr-16 19:19:54

I bet she won't remember

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