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Cheeky requests that make you want to scream

(432 Posts)
MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 20:35:24

What is wrong with people?

This morning, a friend I have not seen in almost 2 years called me. I didn't see the call until lunch time, rang her back and send her a text but didn't reply.

She has just texted back saying that she needed me to give her a lift to the mechanic (WTF?)

Had another one this week, when I had to tell "no" to another mum 14 times as I couldn't have her kid around and take them to an activity because I was working.

She took offence that I couldn't understand that she couldn't take him herself because she was working. Why on earth does she think that I should take time off and earn less money to entertain her kid???


thomassodorislandmum Fri 22-Apr-16 20:48:17

Wait., what 14 times shock

I rarely like asking anyone to help but when you do one no should be enough.

Say "I've already said no" and repeat with "X amount of times" maybe they don't realise how many times they have asked but still in my opinion 1 no is enough.

MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 21:01:38

Yes.. 14 times and then she took offence and said "ok MeMy... I understand... As long as DS or I had not done something to offend you"

They hadn't but after 14 no's, I am certainly offended and trying to avoid them. Especially now her teen is winning to DS that he cannot longer attend the activity because his "mother works her arse off at work and so does his dad"

Interestingly, she works part time and her husband works from home. I have 3 jobs and no husband at home to share the responsibilities of raising a child. Why on earth she thinks I should take pity on them and drop everything to take care of their child who is old enough to take a bus to the activity?

SnobblyBobbly Fri 22-Apr-16 21:11:15

Oh I just cannot understand or bear piss takers!

Recently a friend of ours was griping about travel to and from a family party (which we'll be attending too) so to make life easier/cheaper for them, I said their DC could stay at ours after the party. Great! They say. Then start asking can they drop the kids round before the party too!

Ummm, no. Why would it be easier for me to have your three children to ferry about in addition to my own two? Give them an really gets my goat!

MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 21:18:55

Give them an inch indeed...

It is not the same to deal with extra children after a party as trying to pin them down to get ready for it.

SnobblyBobbly Fri 22-Apr-16 21:31:09

I know, its so obvious how that would be more of an inconvenience, but like your friend, then comes the guilt trip attempts and the 'oh well, we'll just have to figure it out somehow....' Yes. Yes you will!

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Fri 22-Apr-16 21:35:53

I fed a mate's cats once while she was away. Complete PITA, she lived on the other side of town, I don't drive and she lived in a Hoarders style state which makes me anxious. But still, I got on with it but didn't want to do it again.

I think she knew.

The next time I got a text from her while I was out telling me she'd put her spare keys through my letter box.

She knew I wouldn't let them starve...

MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 21:39:23

I told this friend that I couldn't have him because I was working and was not even sure I could be at home in time to drive them to the activity.

Her response? That's ok, I'll send him anyway so they can play.

Erm... No, I still have to go and find their dinner, cook it and serve it and therefore leave early from work.

Did you still take care of them after the party? I would have been tempted to revoke the invitation.

EverySongbirdSays Fri 22-Apr-16 21:40:39

Genuinely confused as to why they would ask a working single mum and then her DS would behave as if it's your fault he can't go? More to it?

But yes pisstakers, particularly if saying no seems petty, like when you appear to have a spare bottle of water but you don't really, and getting asked once is fine but getting asked every damn day does your head in and you're buying all the water and someone else is getting a free drink every day of the week and they come in four packs so they last half as long. <harumph>

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties Fri 22-Apr-16 21:43:31

I held a 7th birthday party for my son and gave out invitations asking to come along at 2pm.
One of the children was dropped off an hour early with his younger brother and told me 'We're early cos our mum had to go out and she said we should eat as much as we can at your house cos she's not doing tea tonight' shock

RaspberryOverload Fri 22-Apr-16 21:56:02

EverySongbirdSays Fri 22-Apr-16 21:40:39
Genuinely confused as to why they would ask a working single mum and then her DS would behave as if it's your fault he can't go? More to it?

I doubt there's anything more than just being self-centred and entitled and asuming other people will do stuff for them they don't (not can't) want to do.

This kid's dad works from home. What stopping him from taking his child to the activity?

EverySongbirdSays Fri 22-Apr-16 22:01:36

Well exactly. So, it's not logical which makes the request bizarre and curious especially 14 times. So maybe the Dad can't take him that day.

Muddlewitch Fri 22-Apr-16 22:02:10

I got asked to pick up one of dd's classmates from school once a week. I don't know the mum at all.

I explained that I couldn't as I don't actually pick my own children up - they go to after school club every day as I work full time. She then tells me her dd has been to work with her dad lots of times and can sit quietly so could I get her and take her back to work with me until I pick my own DC up from after school club shock

When I said no, and why didn't she just put her in the club, she muttered about the cost. THEN asked me if I could put her child down on my ASC forms as a sibling so she could get the sibling discount! I said no as the club is at school and run by school staff who were well aware her dd isn't my child and she was upset with me. Now whenever I see her she gives me a Daily Mail sad face.

I don't know the woman, her only link to us is that her dd is in the same class as one of mine. She has a husband and works two days per week, I am a single parent of four working full time. Cheek doesn't even cover it, I actually thought it was a wind up.

EarthboundMisfit Fri 22-Apr-16 22:03:47

A fellow school mum, whom I don't even know very well, is like this. I used to have her DS for her during the school holidays quite often while I was on mat leave. She now quizzes me and my DH about what weeks we're taking off in the holidays. At least once during those weeks, she will phone at bang on 8am with a 'last minute' childcare crisis. We end up having him, he's a lovely child, but I'm almost certain she plans it.

CallaLilli Fri 22-Apr-16 22:03:57

Um, my colleague who announced she'd be giving me "a shopping list" as I was going to Paris and the later informed me at she'd whittled down the list to four one-litre sized skincare products! Don't think so love, said I...

SunnyL Fri 22-Apr-16 22:04:52

I make clothes for my family as a hobby. This of course means I am available to do all sorts of clothes alterations for friends/family/colleagues /random strangers.

My colleagues daughter bought a butt ugly dirty wedding dress off eBay for her prom and wanted me to do alterations on it. I calculated it would take me 8 hours if I was to do it and eventually managed to get out of it. She then went to a commercial dressmaker and paid her 70 quid for alterations that she'd expected me to do for free angry

Muddlewitch Fri 22-Apr-16 22:06:20

Why are there so many people that think the world owes them free childcare?! It's so rude and entitled!

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Fri 22-Apr-16 22:10:55

A colleague wanted DP to have her son overnight on Boxing Day (I was doing a nightshift) so she could go clubbing.

He didn't want to. Boxing Day is the busiest day of the year (retail manager) and he'd be exhausted. I'd also have to look after him after my nightshift until she picked him up.

We said no. She text repeatedly asking me to 'beg' DP to do this. Repeatedly. When we said no again she responded with, "Well, that's me fucked for Christmas*'.

Sorry. But we have jobs and stuff. The world doesn't stop because you want to get pissed...

EverySongbirdSays Fri 22-Apr-16 22:11:02

A lot of people do the whole you x hobby or talent, or creative arts and so you'll do y for me or let me use your connections.

It's so uncomfortable.

EverySongbirdSays Fri 22-Apr-16 22:14:11

Joffrey that is so so so strange.....I'd undersatand the desperation if it was for work but.... a colleague's partner? So you can get pissed? Where's the father, his family, her family or her friends, prior to begging a colleague's partner ? Does she know him well? Or is she leaving her kid with what is pretty much an acquaintance ??

DrinkFeckArseGirls Fri 22-Apr-16 22:16:21

kingjoffrey i honestly would have texted: i'll drop the keys at rspca as i'm unable to feed your catsband obviously don't want them to starve. She'd have to come up prontonwith a mug replacement.

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Fri 22-Apr-16 22:18:54

Yes, she was leaving her kid with an aquaintance.

She didn't care. She wanted to go out.

MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 22:22:44

There is more to it Everysong, I fell for it initially, she put a lot of pressure and at the time, they didn't have a car. I have been having the child around every week for a year and she doesn't seem to register that I have been providing food, lifts and having to work late once a week every week in order to be able to leave early when his child was around.

They didn't have a car back then, but now they do and even when they have been collecting their child from the activity, they have never offered to give DS a lift. Ever!

I said no this time, because I have changed bosses and while the other one allowed me to take the time off in exchange of working late another day, this one doesn't give me such flexibility, if I leave early, I do not get paid.

Your reasoning is right, and what I think myself, why do they have to ask a single
Mum, who have more on her plate than they do, to take care of the child every week, especially when they have now the means and time to do it themselves?

MeMySonAndl Fri 22-Apr-16 22:26:43

Ps. I don't give a hoot about his dad being working or not on the day. I am too and I am not forcing people to take care of DS, if I can't take DS to the activity, he simply doesn't go.

Their child is not my bl

RaspberryOverload Fri 22-Apr-16 22:28:49

CallaLilli I remember your thread. Have you had any recent strange requests? grin

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