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AIBU?

To blank these two mums at the school who clearly do not seem to like me very much?

145 replies

ambergreenred · 21/04/2016 16:04

DS has been at school for almost 3 years now.

There are two mums of other children in his year who are both friends, and both are uber friendly to everyone else, but they don't seem to like me very much. DS is in the same class as their sons and gets on fine with them as far as I know.

It is things like ignoring me sometimes if they walk past me or at childrens' parties, and speaking to me at other times, being very blunt with me if I do ever make small talk with them, and even a few times when I have walked past them on the school run and they've been together, I've said hello and they've just looked at each other and once they both even started laughing.

Like I said, they both seem to be super friendly with others, so it's not like they're unsociable, I'm getting definite vibes that they dislike me.

I kept saying hello out of politeness and to keep the peace and then the other day I thought 'Fuck this' and have now started to blank them each time I see them, and just act like I've never seen them before in my life. I have done it a few times now, and it feels very liberating. I was getting quite anxious about them not liking me and now I feel like I'm more in control.

AIBU to blank them? I know it sounds childish but I just can't be arsed anymore....

OP posts:

Report

expatinscotland · 21/04/2016 16:06

Fuck 'em. Blank 'em.

CaptainCrunch · 21/04/2016 16:08

Life's too short to give a flying fuck about what twats like this "think" of you.

ambergreenred · 21/04/2016 16:09

Exactly! Now I've decided to blank them it's as if they and their nasty little opinions do not even exist.

OP posts:

getyourfingeroutyournose · 21/04/2016 16:10

Yanbu!

You don't want friends like that and you don't want your son having those two trolls as role models do you?

Liberate yourself. Pretend they don't exist.

MrsJayy · 21/04/2016 16:11

I cant be arsed with flaky fickle folk speak to me or not but i dont make an effort im so glad im away from this kind of nonsense a long time ago.

Maturecheddarcheese · 21/04/2016 16:12

YANBU. I do this to some of the Mums at my DD's school. Rather than wonder whether I will be acknowledged on any given day, I just don't even look their way. There are a few genuinely nice parents that I will wave at/chat to instead which does make it easier. I found that treating people as friendly acquaintances helpful, I don't expect anything from them (like friendship). There is so much gossip at my DD's school I find it better to be a little bit aloof.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 21/04/2016 16:13

Because they're standing in the play ground. They must think they have to act like 9 year olds.
I had the same thing. DD was friends with 2 other children with clique exclusive mothers. They were that juvenile that tgeyd wait at the school gate to walk in together. That's the type of thing I'd did was 11. These were 111 and still carrying on like mean girls.
You can't flog a dead horse for ever. As pp says. Fuck em, blank em. You're not their fucking fan club, are you.

MidnightAura · 21/04/2016 16:14

Yanbu, don't give them another look at the school gates. They are behaving worse than the children!

Ihangmyknickersontheline · 21/04/2016 16:15

They looked at each other and laughed when you said Hi? The bastards! Bollocks to 'em!

wol1968 · 21/04/2016 16:16

I've said hello and they've just looked at each other and once they both even started laughing.

How old are they? 8?

The 'esprit d'escalier' in me whispers 'My God you don't look old enough to have kids at school. You look at least 20 years younger than you actually are...'

(Save that for when you know they're having a birthday. )

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 21/04/2016 16:17

That's why I was made up when DD went to the big school as there are or very little parental involvement then. I mean don't get me at all wrong. You still get the odd ones that like to fanny about. They'll probably be doing the same when their dcs go to work.

SquinkiesRule · 21/04/2016 16:18

Blank, em who cares.
My Dh blanks lots of people they must think hims very rude, but he really is in a world of his own and is a bit deaf, so hasn't got a cue.
We do however make sure to wave/say hello to a few people who pride themselves on being "so friendly, popular and know everyone" as they really don't seem to get on with us and try to blank us and a few other nice people so it pisses them off no end when we cheerfully say hello and they feel obliged to say it back.

SaucyJack · 21/04/2016 16:19

Why would you be in any way unreasonable not to persist in talking to people who've made it clear they don't like you and have no intention of handling the situation maturely?

G1raffe · 21/04/2016 16:20

This probably isnt the case but I really worry that I do this. I have prosopagnosia (face recognition difficulties) and honestly I could have spoken to you on the morning school run and i might not recognise you on the afternoon one.

It takes me forever to get to know who someone is, never mind which child is theirs. I tend to end up smiling inanely at everyone.... but I probably do blank people i've spoken to earlier that week as I've forgotten entirely who they are.

MrsJayy · 21/04/2016 16:22

A woman who clearly didnt like me when dd1 was in school well it started in playgroup crosses the road when she sees me our children are 23 !!

ambergreenred · 21/04/2016 16:23

G1raffe, they are really friendly and bubbly and inclusive to others, so I don't think that they have the same problem that you have. I think they're just being bitches

OP posts:

ambergreenred · 21/04/2016 16:24

MrsJayy, that's really pathetic of her! What a weird woman!

OP posts:

Mousefinkle · 21/04/2016 16:24

I don't talk to anyone . Seems much easier that way! All of this playground nonsense, I swear the children are more mature than some of the parents. There's a mum that's very loud and obnoxious, some of the other mums stand there and look up to her in awe, think they're a bit frightened of her. I just roll my eyes and internally am glad I'm not anything like her. She's one of those "say it how it is, call a spade a spade" people. I just don't get involved. I'm there to collect my children, not socialise.

Luciferbox · 21/04/2016 16:25

Yanbu. A group of mums did that to me last year. I have no shame in blanking them in return.

Madbengalmum · 21/04/2016 16:25

As another pster has said, how old are they!
Sounds like a scene from Mean Girls, fuck em, life is too short.

TeaAddict235 · 21/04/2016 16:25

Sounds like two ladies from my church.

Ignore them. Love your son and be loving to his friends.

WakeUpFast · 21/04/2016 16:27

Yanbu! Once you start blanking you forget they exist and you stop feeling that horrible cringey feeling right after someone's blanked you when you've said hello. It's wonderful not giving a shit!

I stopped saying hello in year 2. Reception and year 1 were a good eye opener for me!

Enjoy!

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ambergreenred · 21/04/2016 16:28

WakeUpFast, I feel so liberated and like I've forgotten they exist already. It's brilliant!

OP posts:

NoMudNoLotus · 21/04/2016 16:29

I can't stand playground politics.

I don't make an effort with anyone now - can't stand the cliques .

Imfinehowareyou · 21/04/2016 16:33

Sounds like two ladies from my church.

Do they understand why they are at church?!! Crazy.

OP, I had this at preschool. It was pretty mortifying and made me dread pick ups/drop offs. I felt really silly as I thought I shouldn't be affected as a grown up but it was embarrassing and hurtful. Now they are separated by schools the one at my school is chatty. Funny that eh?

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