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AIBU?

To think children don't need 2 birthdays a year!!

56 replies

scottishegg · 17/04/2016 14:59

Hi all my 5 year old niece is due to have a whole class birthday party with all the trimmings include a birthday cake with 6 on it next week even though her birthday isn't until the end of August!

My sister in law explained it's because her birthday falls in the summer holidays and not everyone can make her party due to holidays etc, Im Just confused by this as do I buy her 2 gifts one next week one on her actual birthday? ( my children are invited to the party) Also I feel a little sorry for her sister who only gets one birthday a year!

I can understand bringing a birthday forward by a few weeks or even having the party on the following weekend which falls in September but to bring it forward by 4 months!

Feel free to tell me to mind my own business but I'm a right in thinking its a little strange!

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OTheHugeManatee · 17/04/2016 15:01

It depends whether she gets a second party for her actual birthday. If she does that is a bit odd. In fact it's a bit odd whatever really.

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tobysmum77 · 17/04/2016 15:02

It's crap as a child having a birthday in August. I'm guessing that there are a lot of birthdays in her class between now and the end of the year because it does seem quite a long gap. Surely re present you can just say you will give it to her on her birthday?

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squoosh · 17/04/2016 15:03

I can understand 'two birthdays' if a child has a Christmas birthday that often gets forgotten in the festivities. But having an April birthday and an August birthday does seem a touch............Mariah Carey!

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WorraLiberty · 17/04/2016 15:03

Yes, 4 months is weird.

Why doesn't she have the party in July? Has she given a reason?

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JustPoppingIn · 17/04/2016 15:05

I am not sure I would do it myself, but I get why your SIL is doing it. It is really difficult to organise birthday parties around Christmas / summer holiday times.

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scottishegg · 17/04/2016 15:06

No just that reason I have given above!

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Finola1step · 17/04/2016 15:08

My DD has a Xmas birthday. We do her party at the beginning of December or wait until January. Sorted.

No reason why your SIL can't do a party beg of July or Sept. But each to their own.

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Ameliablue · 17/04/2016 15:11

She's not really having more birthdays than normal, just spreading it out. I would probably just get a present for her actual birthday as she will have loads at her party.

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DontMindMe1 · 17/04/2016 15:12

i can understand why her mums choosing to do it early, it makes sense for the dc.
however....you don't want to set a precedent. why not dn the option? it's her birthday and she knows why she's celebrating it early.

i've got lots of nephews n nieces under 10, my siblings have done this on a quite a few occasions. i'm not rich enough to buy them two lots of bday presents each year. Normally, they don't get presents from the family if it's an early bday party for classmates. it's just the classmates who will bring presents if they choose to. on their actual bday when it's mainly family is when we do the presents.

saying that though, once it was a big early bday party - school mates, some of their dp's and family, it was madness Grin we all did presents that time, and on their actual bday we had a day out at Safari park as a family - no presents.

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DontMindMe1 · 17/04/2016 15:13

why not ask the dn, i mean

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Bogburglar99 · 17/04/2016 15:13

My DDs best friend has a birthday early September, her brother mid August. One year their parents had a joint party at the end of term in July. Seemed logical enough.

We gave the present at the party - as family I'd be inclined to give one on her actual birthday as she will have tons of stuff to unwrap from her guests.

Lots of kids who have a birthday party have two cakes. It's just the six month gap that makes it a bit weird!

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CheeseAndOnionWalkers · 17/04/2016 15:19

All my children get a birthday celebration with friends and another with family.
My August born has a party in July before school breaks up in order to guarantee attendees.
April is super early though? I wonder why she has a party then?

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OneMagnumisneverenough · 17/04/2016 15:19

Both my children have their birthdays in the summer holidays. It's a plus in that they never need to go to school on their birthday and we send out invitations to their party (if they have one) a few weeks before the end of the school year. Not everyone might be able to attend but surely that's not a lot different to any other time of year.

You could definitely make an argument for a half year birthday if your child has their real birthday around Christmas day. in that case they get their presents on the half year birthday and a card on the actual birthday.

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CheeseAndOnionWalkers · 17/04/2016 15:20

We've never had the August birthday in September because it's a pain explaining that he's a year younger than a September birthday child.

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SolsburyHell · 17/04/2016 15:24

I would directly ask "when does she want her present, at this party or August?" so that it is clear there will only be one forthcoming.

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bruffin · 17/04/2016 15:30

my dc have september birthdays and we have had parties in October (halloween) and even november because one year a party i arranged clashed with another.

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Floggingmolly · 17/04/2016 15:38

How many candles will they have on the cake?? Seriously though, she'll be getting cards with a big 6 on the front, when she knows, and presumably her friends know that she isn't. It's very weird.

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Buckinbronco · 17/04/2016 15:41

But it's just a party isn't it? She doesn't actually have 2 birthdays a year, you buy her one pressie on her actual
Birthday and on her fake birthday she sees all her friends. Admittedly it would make more sense in September r

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GasLightShining · 17/04/2016 15:44

My DS's birthday is he end of August bit he would have his birthday party end of June/start of July so as to avoid no one attending due to holidays or just plain forgetting as .invites had gone over a month before

I did have a party once in September and he ended up with a load of cards with the wrong age on them.

Family would not give a present until August.

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GreaseIsNotTheWord · 17/04/2016 15:45

Having it in April when your birthday is August is just weird.

I have an August birthday and we learnt over the years that in the month since school broke up that invites do get forgotten. So I used to have my party in the first week of July, before school broke up.

Ds2 often has his birthday party up to 2 weeks early for the same reason, because it tends to fall in the Easter holidays. But 4 months early...I just don't understand why.

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HateTablets · 17/04/2016 15:53

Ask your SIL?

I might do a token present at the time of the whole class party (she will get lots of stuff anyway) and then the 'big' present at the time of her b'day, assuming your SIL will do a party for the family in August.

I can see why she is doing that. It's not different than what people normally do except that the class party and the real party are really far from each other.

However, I can see how it can be very badly taken by her sister. My dcs would have been very upset if their sibling had had 2 parties so far from each other (ie they would see that as 2 b'days celebrated rather than one)

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Wolpertinger · 17/04/2016 15:53

It's crap having a school holiday birthday - I wish my mum had thought of this!

Just ask when she wants presents from family, now or in August. Your girls can take something poundshop to this party if necessary.

Her sister though will get 2 birthdays - she gets birthday party with schoolmates and birthday with extended family just the same. It's just they aren't 4 months apart (4 months is weird, July would have been more sensible). Those of us with school holiday birthdays only ever got the family bit and never ever had a school friends party Sad

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Ed1tY0urPr0f1le · 17/04/2016 15:55

I can see her reasoning, although I'd have gone for a couple of weeks before the end of the summer term.

However, lots of children don't have their party actually on their birthday - quite common to do it on the Saturday before or after - and would only expect one present.

I would think it would be best if she gets her presents from family on the actual day, bit miserable otherwise as, at 6, the party will be a distant memory by August!

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00alwaysbusymum · 17/04/2016 15:57

Have 2 summer holiday birthday boys and I also do a party earlier for school ( usually in July , befor school breaks up, but I wouldn't want or expect family to give presents until actual birthday, where we normally invite just family for cake and playing

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shillwheeler · 17/04/2016 15:58

Perhaps she has her birthday party then as it's harder to organise over the summer holidays (when many of her friends will be away) and waiting until the new school year some of them may have moved away.

I would ask when she would prefer her present if you don't want to buy two (or just buy something really small for the party and tell her you will give her real present on her birthday). My guess is that having the party is what matters rather than the present(s) any way.

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