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AIBU?

To be so upset about scarring?

65 replies

ktmummy1 · 16/04/2016 06:33

My 3.5 year old has at least 15 dents on her face after chicken pox. She had chicken pox a year ago now and although loads better the dents remain. There are 5 between her eyebrows which are small but fairly deep, and show up so obviously when under bright lights/ facing a window....she also has several on her temple which are bigger but more shallow and others dotted about her forehead and cheeks. Does anyone have any experience of scars on this age group and whether or not in the years to come, as she grows, her skin will ever improve? I still feel huge guilt, upset and it's getting me down.

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Junosmum · 16/04/2016 06:41

If it's any consolation I had chicken pox aged 6 and had several scars following it- I remember being upset about them - mainly on my legs and arms bit also one on my face. I honestly have no idea where they are now as they've gone.

Bravada · 16/04/2016 06:46

Not exactly the same because it wasn't chicken pox but my experience. I had an accident at around the same age or a bit younger and had a cut to the face. My parents were very upset and thought I would need plastic surgery when older. Not sure how long it took to fade but certainly by teenage hood, it was practically unnoticeable. The scar is silvery and flat and I barely ever think about it.

Please don't feel guilty - it's not your fault.

SharingMichelle · 16/04/2016 06:47

They will probably fade and disappear a LOT as she grows.
You can get scar serum that helps the skin to recover.
Eh, it's a part of her. My 4 yr old dd also has chicken pox scars, and scars on her legs where she petted a grumpy cat, and one on her chest where she scratched a mozzie bite, and one on her head where she fell out of the bath. She's a beautiful child and a couple of scars won't change that. They are a part of her now, as much as her sticky up bit of hair, and her beautiful smile.

pollyblack · 16/04/2016 07:15

I love my sons little chicken pox scars, he has loads on his face- he is 6yrs and had cp when he was 2yrs. They are visible close up and more in certain light but have got a bit less obvious over time

Ifailed · 16/04/2016 07:24

our youngest ds had a noticeable chicken pox scar on his nose for a few years (got the pox at about 15 months), can't honestly remember when it went, but certainly by the time he started school.

Please don't feel guilty, you have absolutely nothing to blame yourself for.

RNBrie · 16/04/2016 07:26

My paediatrician friend told me that chicken pox scars they get under 5 will almost completely disappear by the time they are fully grown.

My dd2 got it terribly and was very unwell, most of the spots were on her face and head and her face is covered in scars. I mind for her when she's older and also because it reminds me of a hideous period in her life where she suffered badly.

No idea how true what my friend told me is, but it's helped!!

ktmummy1 · 16/04/2016 07:55

Thanks for the support and reassurance. My dd also had a very severe case focused on her face. Her marks are in very prominent places and I'm so hopeful they will improve as she grows. X

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toohardtothinkofaname · 16/04/2016 08:02

Not chicken pox I know, but I suffered a facial injury that needed both muscle & external stitching when I was in my late teens. I'm late 20s now & no one ever notices it and seem surprised when I point it out (not that I do a lot!). I used a bit of bio-oil initially but was quite lazy with it. Some small spot scars I'm
sure will be barely noticeable

toohardtothinkofaname · 16/04/2016 08:03

The scar that is.

BigChocFrenzy · 16/04/2016 08:10

I also had chickenpox aged 3 and scratched the scabs despite my mother tying on little mittens.
The scars faded a lot, but I still have them, aged almost 60.
However, they aren't noticeable unless you are standing close to me and if I cba with better makeup they would be invisible.

SallyVating · 16/04/2016 08:41

My ds had them around the same age and had some very deep scars.

He's 20 now and you can't see them at all

One2Three4Five6 · 16/04/2016 08:54

One of my boys has scars from where a few of his chicken pox spots got infected
Once they all cleared up he was left with a few dents in his face from them, even though he hadn't scratched them or anything like that. I was a little gutted at first but now we hardly notice them. They are just a part of him.
No one has ever commented on them, so I think no one notices them, not just us as his parents being blind to it if you see what I mean. I genuinely don't think anyone notices. He is 10 now, and had chicken pox at 4. I think they are not as bad as they first were.

redannie118 · 16/04/2016 08:59

Pretty much everyone has chicken pox scars(I have 2) or scars from coming off bikes or falling over or whatever. No one will even notice them when she gets older :)

loosechange · 16/04/2016 09:06

They will fade. I had stitches in my face as a child. The only person to mention the scar as an adult has been my brother, and I am one of those people that others seem to feel able to make personal remarks to.

OhForTheLoveOfGin · 16/04/2016 09:08

You've just reminded me I have one at the top of my nose, not thought about it in years.

I saw a plastic surgeon recently about some other scarring I wanted removing. He recommended twice daily massage with any moisturiser (rub gently on scar for 30s/1min) for about six weeks. Said that the action of rubbing with moisturiser would help break down the collagen under the surface of the scar, which in turn would encourage natural repair. My scarring is quite bad (non CP related) and old, but I have noticed a difference.
Can't hurt rubbing in a bit of moisturiser every day twice a day. I use e45 cream.

dolkapots · 16/04/2016 09:23

My dd has extensive scarring on her face from repeated surgeries. There is a silicone gel for scar tissue but I doubt that it would be prescribed for CP "dents" as it is more for keloid post operative scarring. The plastic surgeon also told us that it is the messaging action that is more important than what cream you actually use.

dolkapots · 16/04/2016 09:24

*massaging action, rather than messaging!

Chasethechaser · 16/04/2016 09:28

DD has a prominent forehead scar from an accident.

We grew her fringe as she hated people always asking how she got it.

I'm hoping it fades although it's been nearly two years. Small CP scars usually do! I have two and DS has one near his eyebrow

TooGood2BeFalse · 16/04/2016 09:42

Neither are the same, so really sorry if this is unhelpful, but my DS was born with a bright red birthmark on his forehead. Think fire truck red! We weren't too worried as it wasn't huge and thought it was quite attractive. Four years later it's gone, just the tiniest trace of pink.

At 2 he cut the bridge of his nose open on a coffee table and needed 8 stitches. It was a seriously deep scar and I felt terrible, you could see it a mile away. 2 years later you can barely see it.

Kids skin is incredible, I swear it has twice our healing powers!I'm sure your DDS scars will fade, so many kids have chickenpox. Please don't panic

ktmummy1 · 16/04/2016 13:36

Thanks for this...I'm a little more positive that further improvement is possible then, even after a year!

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SlimCheesy · 16/04/2016 13:48

A friend's DS, now aged 6 had terrible cp when about a year old and was covered in scars over his face and scalp. They were quite lurid red also for a while. You can hardly see them now at all...... very faintly but they fade year on year.

GabiSolis · 16/04/2016 13:57

I still have one visible CP scar on my face but honestly it doesn't bother me and never has. Children are not always concerned about these things, it often bothers parents more.

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Princesspeach1980 · 16/04/2016 14:01

My DS had awful chicken pox spots on his face after he had them at 2 yrs old. The scars were quite noticeable for a couple of years, but they've faded loads as he's grown ( now 8) and now there are only 2 that are really visible ( and even they don't stand out ), he has a few more that are really faint across his forehead, but they are under his fringe anyway, and only show up when he gets red faced from running round. If you're worried it wouldn't do any harm to use a bit of bio oil or similar to see if that speeds the process up.

ktmummy1 · 16/04/2016 14:06

We have used bio oil for months but they caused milia cysts after a while so we switched to aveeno and now palmers cocoa butter. Bless her, she hates me rubbing cream on them ! Fingers crossed they'll improve in time as they are still very obvious at the moment, skin coloured indentations

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ktmummy1 · 16/04/2016 14:08

Pbviously I don't tell her why I'm rubbing cream on her, she's totally oblivious!

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