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AIBU - Wedding Special!

(94 Posts)
Fyaral Fri 15-Apr-16 16:01:25

DP's best mate is getting married tomorrow. Its been a bit of a shambles but I am v close to sacking it off altogether.

We have never recieved proper invitations as they were too disorganised so this has all bern over text and fb message.

DP and groom have been mates since uni. Groom has been crap at meeting up for a while even though we live quite close. I don't know them well but have driven them around city in past as they don't drive.

Originally we were invited to the wedding then it changed to dp invited to whole thing and I could come to everything except the ceremony as the room was too small. Whatever. I would meet dp straight after then we would go to reception.

On Monday, dp asked if I had put in food choices. I was confused as had not been asked at all. Dp texts to confirm I am invited to reception and they say no, only evening starting at 8. This is definitely a change from before.

So... AIBU to think they are rude gits and go to my mates birthday instead which will be much more fun?

whois Fri 15-Apr-16 16:02:33

Oh yeah, go to your mates birthday instead.

pinkyredrose Fri 15-Apr-16 16:03:47

YANBU! they obviously don't want you there, if I were you I'd definitely go to my mates birthday and have a great time!

Normandy144 Fri 15-Apr-16 16:04:04

Oh god sounds awful. I'd send your DP and give it a wide birth. Go to your best mates. If they get sniffy you could always say 'didn't you get my text saying I couldn't make it'?

ScarletOverkill Fri 15-Apr-16 16:04:24

Mates birthday.
I doubt you would get any comeback from not going. What does your DP think?

Lilaclily Fri 15-Apr-16 16:05:11

Agree don't go

MissBattleaxe Fri 15-Apr-16 16:05:15

The groom is rude. Don't bother. I think it's rude to only invite one half of a couple when you know them both well enough to cadge lifts off. Enjoy the birthday party!

TiggerPiggerPoohBumWee Fri 15-Apr-16 16:05:16

I'd go to the birthday. You don't really know them and they never really invited you properly anyway. At the rate they are going they won't let you in to the evening party anyway!

It's going to be a shambles of a wedding altogther, isn't it?

Therealloislane Fri 15-Apr-16 16:05:30

Yanbu definitely go to your friend's party!

gamerchick Fri 15-Apr-16 16:05:34

Bloody right go to your mates birthday. Cheeky gits.

MadisonAvenue Fri 15-Apr-16 16:06:58

Definitely go to your mate's birthday event and don't give this wedding another thought (and don't give them any more lifts either).

Fyaral Fri 15-Apr-16 16:10:08

DP is sad about it as his mate is so crap but won't mind me not going.

Another detail I forgot is we are putting up best man and another couple we know for the wedding. I don't mind as I like them and like hosting but they will all be swanning off together and I will be left. I won't drive them there even though I'm the only driver. They can get a taxi. I have to go get the couple from the station in a while.

AlpacaPicnic Fri 15-Apr-16 16:12:06

Go to the birthday. They won't even notice you are not there, and I mean that in a nice, not-as-bitchy-as-it-now-sounds way.

TheCrumpettyTree Fri 15-Apr-16 16:12:32

Go to the birthday, they sound like shit friends.

WellErrr Fri 15-Apr-16 16:14:51

Go to the birthday.

Ginmakesitallok Fri 15-Apr-16 16:16:13

Wait a minute, you're putting up 2 couples and you're not even invited to the meal? Fuck that for a game of soldiers!

Gatehouse77 Fri 15-Apr-16 16:16:14

What does your DP want to do?
If it doesn't cause problems between you and him, I'd go to your mate's birthday...

SleepyBoBo Fri 15-Apr-16 16:16:22

I'd go to my mates birthday, wouldn't cross my mind to feel bad. They obviously have not considered you, so feel no guilt giving them the same treatement. Go where you're welcomed and will most certainly have fun.

NicknameUsed Fri 15-Apr-16 16:17:20

If the groom is your partner's best mate why hasn't he said anything to him about being so inconsistent?

I agree that you should go to the birthday. I wouldn't bother getting the B & G a present either.

pictish Fri 15-Apr-16 16:17:44

Go to your mate's birthday. It's not a big deal.

Ciggaretteandsmirnoff Fri 15-Apr-16 16:18:04

So they are using you to facilitate folk getting to their wedding? I'd be pissed off and TBH your dp should have said something.

Go to your mates birthday

pictish Fri 15-Apr-16 16:18:58

Do think it's odd that the groom wouldn't invite his best mate's partner to the whole day though. Are they getting married in a caravan?

FishWithABicycle Fri 15-Apr-16 16:19:09

Yanbu. You have no obligation to attend any part of any wedding (well, perhaps your own is an exception)

pictish Fri 15-Apr-16 16:20:43

And you have their wedding guests staying with you?
Gosh...I'm sure B&G didn't intend any offence but nevertheless that is quite rude.

Go to your mate's birthday thing. No question.

EponasWildDaughter Fri 15-Apr-16 16:21:03

That's beyond rude.

Bad manners to split a couple up IMO. Invite one - invite both.

Especially if one of the couple is best man and the other is putting up 3 of the other guests.

YANBU to go to friend's do instead.

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