I don't think I am. In fact, I think the fact that I haven't exploded shows incredible restraint.
Essentially, I've been doing our house up to sell to buy somewhere bigger. This has been ongoing for about 8 months as I've had to fit repairs/fittings/painting etc. around work and DS who is just a toddler.
I'm sick of living in a top floor flat. We need more room and I feel extraordinarily guilty at the amount of noise we make. DS is loud and prone to stamping/running (what toddler isn't). We bought this home before he arrived and it would have been fine for just the two of us. Now DS is older, we 're bursting at the seams. I also want to move to be closer to my mum and to have access to a better catchment. I know we're a good few years away from school being an issue, but I want to get him settled with kids who he'll be going to school with.
I've taken the lead with everything as DH has never been the most proactive. Fixed/replaced things that needed done, done a shit load of painting myself. We had a mortgage appointment (which I organised) today and got an agreement in principle for a larger sum. It won't buy a dream house, but it'll get is something decent with a garden.
So he leAves it until 5 minutes AFTER the appointment to say he doesn't want to move. We can't afford the type of house "he" wants (no work needing done, big rooms, big garden etc.) and he can't manage the increase in monthly payments. We're not talking a lot more-150-200 a month-but he's usually skint at the end of the month.
Nevermind that he insisted on an expensive car, expensive gym membership and sodding sky (which we never watch). Never mind that we wouldn't pay so much in council tax and wouldn't have factors fees to contend with. I have enough in savings to cover cost of solicitors/agents. Yes, it would be tight for a year (when we'd get a raise and have help with nursery fees) but I feel the benefits far outweigh the sacrifices.
I'm just so angry and disappointed. The flat we live in is lovely and the area is nice but I'm sick to death of having to be out the house at ridiculous o'clock in the morning so as not to disturb the neighbours (they don't ask for this but he is so noisy). I am so angry that he's let me replace things that needed replaced with "ok" models-things I wouldn't have chosen had they been for us and not a new buyer. I'm angry that I've wasted weeks of my time on this when I could have been spending time with DS. I've also spent money we could have used for a really nice summer holiday.
I'm not belittling his money worries. I understand that it's tight but I would happily contribute more (I earn less but am much better at saving) but apparently that makes him feel bad and he doesn't want to do it.
We're on cometely different pages regarding our future and our priorities are so different. I don't think my anger is misplaced but apparently I'm totally overreacting,
I've name-changed because he knows I'm a regular poster.
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AIBU?
To be so angry at 'DH''s timing
56 replies
Mytummyisnotatrampoline · 11/04/2016 17:47
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