32+ 3 with DC3 who is DD1, DS2s birth was horrid had PTSD as a result and MH issues however on reflection MH issues were present a LONG time, and this was a catalyst to meds etc so, trying to se the positives it helped long term.
I Have GDM so extra scans and what not generally but this time was going to be my VBAC finally feel happy enough to try BF, have support of my awesome dpula, and this baby is with my new DP rather than my abusive XH, following a MC so is my rainbow.
At 26 week scan havjng had no worries up to then, all hell breaks loose. Baby has oligohydraminous (low fluid) and query IUGR as v small. Told to prepare for very early delivery and all that it entails... obviously shitting self.
However with careful monitoring, input from an amazing consultant, SOM intervention to build a good rapport with anaesthetist etc, weve gotten to now. No signs of immenent delivery, likely to be around 34 + 4 to 35 plus. So leaps and bounds from where we were.
DD is wiggly, and feels strong however I know she will still be small, Est 2lb12oz at scan two weeks ago so id hope over 3lb now. I Know she may still need help and have issues..I know we may still have a NICU stay ahead
Despite this.. im still excited! I cant wait to hold her feed her love her... is that reckless? In my heart im hopeful she will feed well straight away and we will just have like a week in SCBU.
AIBU to be so hopeful? Am I setting myself up for a huge fall? Any experiences welcome, I just worry my hope will mean I struggle when she is born.
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AIBU?
To be excited regardless!
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MsFiestyPants · 10/04/2016 12:24
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