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AIBU to be annoyed at MIL for saying bf up to 1 year + is "weird"?

(50 Posts)
crunchymummy Fri 08-Apr-16 15:16:35

2nd post about breastfeeding

Comments have been made involving, he'll have teeth by then and he'll be able to ask for it... she bottle-fed her DCs but AIBU to be annoyed and how to deal with these comments in a polite way?

Helgathehairy Fri 08-Apr-16 15:20:01

Smile and nod approach might be best.

Euphemia Fri 08-Apr-16 15:21:51

None of her business. Ignore.

BarbarianMum Fri 08-Apr-16 15:22:22


If you generally get on with her and this is her one weirdness, but then try laughing gently at her and telling her not to be silly.

If this is just one of many ways in which she oversteps the boundaries then more robust measures may be needed.

PeppasNanna Fri 08-Apr-16 15:26:52

I'm probably about your Mil age. Bf wasn't always the 'norm'. Bf beyond 6 months almost unheard of.

But she's being rude. How you feed your baby is none of her business. I would tell her so....politely of course!wink

MigGril Fri 08-Apr-16 15:28:01

My MIL bf but obviously only did so for a short period. As she to couldn't get her head round feeding a baby who had teeth.

Note though even very tiny babies ask for milk this is what they do when they cry. They still can't talk at one but both mine Could used baby sign for milk saved the crying.

Tell her feeding a baby with teeth is no different then feeding one without. Some babies are born with teeth to.

I'd just politely remark with each comment and carry on and ignore. Yes unfortunately it gets annoying. Lucky when you get to a certain age they will give in, label you a hippy breastfeeder and stop asking when you will stop. It was over one with DD though.

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 08-Apr-16 15:28:23

I sued to tell FIL to go and talk to the World Health Organisation about it and leave me alone.

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 08-Apr-16 15:28:40

*used. I wish I'd sued him.

SingingMyOwnSpecialSong Fri 08-Apr-16 15:30:14

DD is 14 months and only recently got her first top tooth, made answering questions about potential biting easy grin I tend to simply tell anyone rude enough to comment that I am very happy with my decision to continue and will wean when we are both ready. The person who has made the biggest fuss about 'you know you can stop now' so far was my female GP when I was having a change to the skin of my breast investigated hmm

thecitydoc Fri 08-Apr-16 15:37:43

her view and she is entitled to it - ignore her

splendide Fri 08-Apr-16 15:38:17

My DS has just given up himself at 18 months. I'm really sad about it

escapedfrommordor Fri 08-Apr-16 15:41:48

She'd entitled to her view, she's not entitled to be rude. Tell her she doesn't have to look and do what you want. Shut that sort of rubbish down, her opinion is irrelevant

olrose Fri 08-Apr-16 16:38:29

none of her business, its your baby not hers so do whatever you feel is right for your baby.

FlowersAndShit Fri 08-Apr-16 16:45:43

I do think it's odd, but i'm probably in the minority, at least on mumsnet.

0christmastree5 Fri 08-Apr-16 16:48:14

No ones business but yours.
If you are in good terms normally I'd politely tell her that you don't need any help deciding what you feed your baby.
The rude comments I'd stare but say nothing.
Opinions on breastfeeding are like farts, all stink except you don't mind your own.

0christmastree5 Fri 08-Apr-16 16:49:52

I bf my 5c for 18 months, if that makes me weird.....I care not.

QuiteLikely5 Fri 08-Apr-16 16:53:28

To some people it is weird why can't you accept that instead of taking offence?

So what if she doesn't like it! Does she have to like it ? Can't she share her opinion on such things? Can she only share it on certain things?

I personally prefer people to be upfront though

Likeaninjanow Fri 08-Apr-16 17:12:22

I just used to say 'it's a lot more common than you'd think', and leave it at that. It worked fine for mesmile

Janecc Fri 08-Apr-16 17:20:03

I remember reading children lose the ability to suck from the breast I think at around 7 so anything before nature has kicked in despite the fact that we humans believe ourselves to be so far evolved is actually natural. Extended breastfeeding is still rare. I stopped at 2.5 years because DD didn't feed for about four days and then would feed several times in one day. My mother frowned on me. Times have changed. It was fashion earlier last century maybe in the 40's/50's? to feed only bottles as breast feeding was considered inferior. Also many women were taught to follow a strict schedule and for a very prescriptive and very short length of time (like 10 minutes).
Smile, nod, shrug, put baby to boob. Perhaps add an oh well.

YoJesse Fri 08-Apr-16 17:27:06

It's not weird it's lovely! I breastfed for over a year and people did have that opinion. you develop a thick skin. Sadly I gave in to pressure when my dh started getting uncomfortable with it.

BertrandRussell Fri 08-Apr-16 17:29:13

You'll have to be annoyed with the majority of other people as well, then........sadly, her view is the norm.

MoonriseKingdom Fri 08-Apr-16 17:29:32

I intended to bf to 6 months but in the end carried on until 14 months when it gradually came to a halt. Both my DM and DMIL had bf their children for up to 6 months. My DM who was very supportive actually said she didn't know you could breast feed beyond 6 months.

I told my DMIL that the advice was formula until 1 year and I didn't want to waste money. She's very thrifty and so was happy with that explanation.

Feeding with teeth is fine - I had one little nip that was it. By a year they are likely to be taking milk much less frequently than before weaning anyway. I don't think most people would have any idea I was still feeding at that stage. Ultimately, it's no business of anyone but you.

Alexa444 Fri 08-Apr-16 17:37:01

She WBU to comment. I'd be annoyed too at someone telling me how to feed my own child. Personally I think its weird and the whole idea of it really squicks me but would never say anything to anybody as I accept it is my problem not theirs. Its just one of those things that makes me v uncomfortable to think about, probably because they are starting to become a proper little person by that age, rather than a tiny baby, I don't really know why but it is your choice how long to BF for and I would just be really blunt and say well it isn't your boob so not really your business is it? If she pushes it.

YoJesse Fri 08-Apr-16 17:37:42

And on the teeth subject he never once bit me. did sometiMes twist my other nipple with his fingers during a feed and that bloody caned!!!

scotsgirl64 Fri 08-Apr-16 17:47:43

ignore her and do what you feel is best...I breastfeed all 3 of mine, 10 months, 32 months (only stopped cos I gave birth to her brother!) and 18 months...they're now 22,19 and 16 and have all been incredibly healthy!

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