Advanced search ask my 7 year old to dry up?

(18 Posts)
OnwardsAndUpwardsYo Thu 07-Apr-16 19:45:34

Because, apparently, no-one else at school has to and I'm beyond awful for suggesting it.

So really - what do your 6/7/8 year olds do to actually help? I asked because her dad was busy with work things and the draining board was filling too quickly from a big dinner I'd cooked. It was just a casual 'oh dd could you be super-duper helpful and help dry some bits for me please?' not a big demand.

She half-heartedly did three plastic cups and a couple of plates under duress and much drama.

I showed her how to hold the tea towel quite a few times to make it easier for her to which she got stroppy and stormed off.

Maybe it's the time of day causing extra stroppyness - it was after dinner so I know tiredness is beginning to set in. She used to enjoy it when she was 4/5, helping mummy and playing at being a big girl etc. She actually could do it quite well then! I hardly ask, in fact we hardly ask anything of her which did make me wonder what is a usual level of help from that age group.

I'm all for letting kids be kids. But also I think it's good to make them understand that offering help is important, sometimes necessary, and that these things don't just magically do themselves.

So, too young still? What do yours do?

BigBroIsWatching Thu 07-Apr-16 20:04:45

Not too young at all! My 7 year old would do it, but not before having a huge moan about it.
He enjoys using the washing machine, under supervision, and helps collect and hang the laundry.... because I'm 9 months pregnant and cannot bend without feeling like a whale

MammasBrandNewBag Thu 07-Apr-16 20:10:04

My niece (6) has to set the table for dinner, my nephew (10) has to clear the table after breakfast and wash his and has brother and sister's bowls. They both are responsible for tidying their own rooms and making their beds. Their younger brother (3) must tidy his toys away himself.

I had to do way more growing up, starting at about age 6 we had a rota and weekly chores that we were responsible for that included: dusting, hoovering, washing up and drying / putting away, laundry and a lot more. But we were a large family and I also think we had too much responsibility as children

As soon as DS is old enough, we will play the tidying up game my sister played with her kids and he will learn to pick up after himself.

YANBU to ask her to help you, I think it will do her good.

OnwardsAndUpwardsYo Thu 07-Apr-16 20:17:12

I thought about a rota but had no idea what level to do it to!

Maybe start with twice a week drying up? She can't wash up due to medical reasons and I can't seem to find child's washing up gloves, that's fine I won't ask her.

My instinct says don't do it for rewards, treats etc. I would rather she do it because she knows it helps and is being part of the team. But if treats and rewards are the only way do you think it's a good idea?

Sorry - things were different when I was this age the family situation was different. So I don't feel I can compare.

And here I was thinking first child issues were just for the baby years! I still don't have a clue what I'm doing!

cocochanel21 Thu 07-Apr-16 20:28:34

When Dd1 was 7/8 she would help around the house. It was just the two of us and I worked F/T. She would dry the dishes,set the table and keep her room tidy.

Artandco Thu 07-Apr-16 20:31:42

Why does anything need drying? Surely you wash and rinse stuff and it air dries on the rack?

Get her to do chores, but don't waste on drying something that will dry by itself

OnwardsAndUpwardsYo Thu 07-Apr-16 20:35:55

Art we do often do that but sometimes I want it all clear and gone, sink washed, draining board washed and cleaned just because it's nice, and better to come down to in the morning. Also tonight I was running out of space and thought I'd get it dried as we went.

I prefer things dried up, don't you? Makes me feel they're properly clean! But no, I'm not anal about it.

Artandco Thu 07-Apr-16 20:37:51

No, drying stuff with a cloth makes me feel they are less clean as smear marks. Any pots etc that dot go in dishwasher we just wash and on dryer. They are fully dry to put away within 1/2 hr so hardly cluttering up the house

OnwardsAndUpwardsYo Thu 07-Apr-16 20:55:21

Oh well. We all do things differently I don't want this to be a debate about wiping up. wink

MammasBrandNewBag Thu 07-Apr-16 20:58:58

Nothing wrong with starting at twice a week - I'm with you re rewards, it should be a responsibility she has as part of the family not something she is "paid" for. She could do extras for treats maybe?

I like things to be dried too - fresh cloth each night, if it's done properly you don't get smears. Art, I am jealous of your dishwasher! We rent and don't have one.

starry0ne Thu 07-Apr-16 21:06:45

My DS ( 8) makes his bed ( pulls quilt up)
Tidies his room ( needs mummy tidy once a month ish)
takes out rubbish
Feeds g.pig.

He doesn't dry dishes and neither do I...

He doesn't get rewards ... We have a moto ..We are a family team and to be part of that team he has to help..

If he moans at doing anything for example taking my plate in the kitchen..I then point out exactly what I have done to the meal, shop, pack it away, prepare, cook and serve and then I will be washing dishes.. It puts it into context for him..

At 7 you will find I think most kids help in some way....Part of been a child is learning how to be independent and I doubt a teen wants to learn how to help...

lalalalyra Thu 07-Apr-16 21:08:53

My 8 year old sets the table every day for dinner. He doesn't get pocket money for that, I feel everyone should have one job (at least) in the house. He does other chores for extra pocket money and he chooses them every week (the others do the same - there's a new trampoline park opened near us recently and I suddenly have amazingly helpful children desperate to do jobs!).

I don't think 7 is too young to pitch in.

NoTractorsAtTheTable Thu 07-Apr-16 21:10:24

DH and I have loud singing contests when we do the washing up and drying. There's only one rule - You can only sing if you're helping... wink Guess who's DD became very keen on helping...

Our poor neighbours blush

iamdivergent Thu 07-Apr-16 21:28:39

My (just turned) 8 year old dries all the dishes, 11yr old washes them all so YANBU

iamdivergent Thu 07-Apr-16 21:30:43

Sorry, wasn't finished - mine do it for no reward.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant Thu 07-Apr-16 22:26:29

No. Yanbu.

Unless you are here paid slave?

I would have a rota sheet. Give her a 10 minutes job each day.
Monday put out recycling
Tuesday dry up
Wednesday set table
Thurs help with dinner
Fri dry up
Sat vacuum downstairs
Sunday change bed

If she wants to do extra, then she can and she can be rewarded for the extras. Either pocket money, park time or whatever appeals to you all.

At 6-8, ds was doing
Change his bed
Put his laundry away
Put stinkies in wash
Sort washing and load machine
Wash or dry up
Mow lawn (his choice)
Carry shopping

Some were chores, others he liked to help with. Still does on a good day.

When he got to junior school, they had a residential every year. First job when they got there was make your bed.

About half the kids sat there screaming for an hour as they had no idea how to.

The lucky ones asked their friends to help.
The bully didn't get a helper...

OK, ds might not be accurate about the time. He was only 7.

Part of our job as parents is to equip our kids for adult life. They need to learn there is time for jobs and time for fun. Obviously it's not right to expect a child to come in from school and be a slave for the next 6 hours. But 10-15 minutes a day, helping and being part of the family team is a good thing.

OnwardsAndUpwardsYo Thu 07-Apr-16 22:41:41

I like that Why. I can see a 10 minute job taking 40, but it should get easier!

I think she's been babied for a long time, she has various medical issues which take our extra attention. Now I see though that there's nothing stopping her from helping. She is already expected to put garden toys away at the end of play and also the living room toys before we go out/to bed. She does that with her younger sibling. That to me, isn't helping with housework exactly, that's more about responsibility for their own objects and respecting them. After all they don't want them broken/soggy/faded etc. It's when it isn't something directly about or for her it's a problem and I need to nip it in the bud.

Thanks for the replies. I'll get into creating some kind of schedule tomorrow. Nothing heavy or intimidating.

RubbleBubble00 Thu 07-Apr-16 23:15:51

ds are 2,4,7 all. mine bring their dishes ect from table, rinse them and put them in the dishwasher (under supervision).. ds3(2) is the only one who volunteers to unload dishwasher but don't think that will last long as he gets older They take turns wiping down the table (as the like the cleaning spray).

They help me load washing machine and bring down dirty clothes from upstairs washing basket. They all love to hoover - major fight and they take turns grin

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