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AIBU?

To think the anti-pink brigade can be a bit OTT

206 replies

NeedACleverNN · 05/04/2016 18:02

I have noticed on here there are some people who refuse to allow their girls wear anything pink/sparkly/overly feminine. A lot of the reasoning seems to be because it sets women back 100 years etc etc and gender neutral stuff.

However the same people are eager to point out they don't care if their son wears it and in fact actively encourage them to do so.

AIBU to think pink is just a colour and if girls want to enjoy pink and princesses and babies and pushchairs they should be able to just as much as a boy can?

OP posts:
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UmbongoUnchained · 05/04/2016 18:04

Totally agree. This whole gender fluid thing is getting ridiculous

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ghostyslovesheep · 05/04/2016 18:07

I have 3 girls - I have NEVER met anyone like this and I am a feminist - also referring to them as a 'brigade' is bound to win you friends

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RupertPupkin · 05/04/2016 18:08

I think it's just because there is so much pink. When you go shopping for girls it's often a sea of pink. That's what people resist, they just want a bit more choice. I have lots of very feminist parents as friends and I have never met anyone who NEVER dresses them in pink. They just want more choice.

It's nothing to do with being "gender fluid", that's a different issue altogether. Colour does not equal gender!

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ollieplimsoles · 05/04/2016 18:08

hmm can't say I've noticed on here but my mil thinks Im in the 'anti pink brigade' because I don't let dd wear the hideous ott pink glittery tutu shite she buys her because she likes it.

Also because she says its what little girls 'should' wear and that pisses me off.

I think a pink onesie with ruched shoulders and a cheap bit of pink sparkly netting around it makes dd look ridiculous, if that makes me anti pink then so be it!

she has pink clothes I just find it so boring

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Sirzy · 05/04/2016 18:08

I agree. I can understand avoiding pink versions of toys when 'normal' ones are avaiakble. But the odd pink t shirt, or glittery clip isn't going to damage anyone.

There again my 6 year old son has today chosen a lovely pink shirt for himself, I don't think letting him wear pink is going to have any negative effects on him either!

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usual · 05/04/2016 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AthelstaneTheUnready · 05/04/2016 18:12

I quite like pink, especially the paler ones.

I get ANGRY when I go to buy, say, a Mother's Day card and the aisle is a migraine-inducing landscape of various shades of pink.

I like choice. I do not like looking at 20 feet's worth of lazy marketing.

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Floggingmolly · 05/04/2016 18:12

I agree. How can it be so disempowering for a girl to like pink princesses when there seems to be a definite movement to force encourage boys in that direction? Confused

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Osolea · 05/04/2016 18:13

YANBU. I've noticed it too, and I dislike how people seem to almost show off about it if their girls aren't into pink glittery stuff. Obviously people should be proud of their children, but it's the implication that girls who are stereotypically girly aren't as good as ones that aren't.

I see the point that parents of girls would like a bit more choice than just pink and purple, but they seem to be far more vocal about it than the parents of boys who would like a choice of more than blue and camouflage.

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Thebookswereherfriends · 05/04/2016 18:14

Yes, to it being about choice and the message that is subtly given. None of the pretty pink clothes have pictures of dinosaurs or say little explorer, that's what annoys me as I'm fine with my dd liking pink, but let's allow girls to like pink and dinosaurs.

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VagueIdeas · 05/04/2016 18:14

Someone posted that the "pink stinks" type campaigns are actually a bit misogynist, in that they devalue girly things and girl pursuits, whereas anything "boyish" is completely A-OK.

Double standards, don't you think? Where are the campaigns decrying blue and boyish things?

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RupertPupkin · 05/04/2016 18:15

But the odd pink t shirt, or glittery clip isn't going to damage anyone.

But is there anyone who holds this view? That one or two pink t-shirts and a sparkly clip will cause damage?

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TheFairyCaravan · 05/04/2016 18:16

I agree with you OP.

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YouTheCat · 05/04/2016 18:17

I don't know anyone who has banned their girls from wearing pink. I didn't.

Once dd got to about 6 she flatly refused to wear any kind of pink. It was entirely her choice. My exmil thought it was me though Hmm . But then she thoroughly disapproved of me dressing dd in a denim pinafore.

I do know plenty of parents who would never dream of dressing their sons in pink though.

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Itinerary · 05/04/2016 18:17

Parents choose clothes they like for their own children, don't they? Some parents don't like pink or sparkly clothes, some do. I'm sure there are just as many people who would nearly always choose pink. Personally I find there is too much pink/blue in the shops and would like to see a good variety of colours for both girls and boys.

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gastropod · 05/04/2016 18:18

One could also argue that telling (or implying to) girls that their choices (e.g. pink) are invalid, while validating and encouraging the choices that boys make, is as harmful as the gender/colour stereotyping itself.

In other words, in trying to promote gender equality, we may end up sending the message to girls that "boys' stuff" and "boys' choices" are somehow better.

It's a fine line though, as it's very hard to know how many of those choices are natural and how many are forced or influenced by marketing, the media, etc.

I got a bit fed up with all the "anti pink" stuff too - I have two girls and one was all pink and purple glittery Barbie princesses until she was four (now she hates pink) while the other isn't fussed about colours or gender-specific stuff either way.

I just try not to push them towards or away from any gender-specific stuff or influence their choices in that regard. It's hard sometimes, but in the end if they prefer Barbie to Ben 10, so be it.

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curren · 05/04/2016 18:19

I agree op.

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 05/04/2016 18:19

Yes I agree with you OP.

I don't have girls, so I am the pink sparkly princess in our house.

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gastropod · 05/04/2016 18:20

Sorry that post didn't make much sense. I think about this a lot, just can't express my views very well today!

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Itinerary · 05/04/2016 18:22

There's no sound reason why pink should be considered a "girls" colour and blue a "boys" colour. They're just the current fashions/stereotypes that are being marketed. It's simplistic and lazy, and that's why there's a resistance against it.

Pink/sparkles/fairies/princesses are massively over-represented as colours and themes for girls clothes and toys, and the same applies to blue/camouflage/transport/dinosaurs with boys clothes and toys.

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Imfinehowareyou · 05/04/2016 18:22

I know a lot of people who are like this (live in an incredibly lefty arty farty area). I see them as exactly having the same fixed mindset as ollieplimsoles MIL. If you say your child can never wear/have anything pink how is that different to someone telling their daughter that she can't wear blue as it's for boys? Both sets are attributing meaning to colours and forcing that on their children. I let my girls choose. One used to love pink stuff and now thinks it's naff. The other still loves it. Personally I don't see the need for toys to be pink (or blue) if there's no reason eg. a cash register, but if that's the one my child wants I will get it. I find the fashion my peers dress their children in (artfully mismatched/lots of handknits/the godforsaken tutu and wellies/stripy tights...) is as contrived as the party dresses/headbands/sparkly stuff.

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NeedACleverNN · 05/04/2016 18:23

No I get your point gastro

My dd loves princess and babies and when I asked once about a stroller reccomendation for her to play with, I did get quite a few people commenting on why does she need a pushchair for her baby? It's such a girls toy.

Yet Dd also likes dinosaurs and cars.

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formerbabe · 05/04/2016 18:24

I never hear anyone complain about all the blue clothes there are for boys, nor do I hear anyone complain about their sons being encouraged to play with dinosaurs, super hero figures or other typical "boys toys".

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Thisisnotausername · 05/04/2016 18:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 05/04/2016 18:26

YANBU. I've noticed it too, and I dislike how people seem to almost show off about it if their girls aren't into pink glittery stuff. Obviously people should be proud of their children, but it's the implication that girls who are stereotypically girly aren't as good as ones that aren't

I agree. You see a lot of that on MN. The Pink Stinks campaign really annoys me. I know if you look at their site they explain that's not really what they mean but the campaign could just as easily have been called "Pink Stinks and Blue does Too"

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