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To not let dd wear swimming trunks?

(192 Posts)
Speckledpeckle Fri 01-Apr-16 18:26:05

Just that really Dd is 5. Embraces all things typically thought of as "boy" strongly rejects anything remotely girly. Now wants to wear swimming trunks when we go swimming.. I embrace all the requests for spiderman shirts, darth Vader outfits etc. Right down to her underpants. However wearing swimming trunks feels a step to far.. I can't really articulate why.. Dh is on the fence doesn't really feel it's appropriate but probably wouldn't be too bothered. I have told her no, she is a girl and they wear swimming costumes! Now feeling like a right mean mummy as she says she no longer wants to go swimming then! Aibu?

LindyHemming Fri 01-Apr-16 18:28:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Osolea Fri 01-Apr-16 18:28:34

Any chance she'd compromise by wearing a pair of swimming trunks or shorts with a rash vest?

teeththief Fri 01-Apr-16 18:29:13

Can she wear a rash vest on her top half as a compromise?

bekindtome Fri 01-Apr-16 18:29:28

My ds has a 2 piece Spider-Man which has shorts and t-shirt. Is that a good compromise?

someonestolemynick Fri 01-Apr-16 18:29:37

At five it doesn't really make a difference. I would let her.

But if you're really uncomfortable would trhnks and a t-short be a compromise?

sunnydayinmay Fri 01-Apr-16 18:30:16

Trunks and a rash vest? Mind you, we used to wear just bikini bottoms at that age.

hownottofuckup Fri 01-Apr-16 18:30:16

What about one of those all in one suits?

SoThisisMe Fri 01-Apr-16 18:30:17

DS has a Spiderman set from Sports Direct that comes with shorts and a rash vest type top. Would something like that work?

Speckledpeckle Fri 01-Apr-16 18:30:43

I've tried doing the whole character thing - although mostly her loves are superheroes so not easy to find on an actual costume! Honestly I've showed her patterned, plain, tankinis, bikinis the lot - I feel like a swimming costume saleswoman! She rejects them all wants trunks or swimming shorts whatever they're called! Essentially whatever boys wear for swimming!

Coldtoeswarmheart Fri 01-Apr-16 18:30:49

Shorts and a wetsuit type top?

PhoenixReisling Fri 01-Apr-16 18:31:02

What about a boys sunsuit? The shapes are the same as the girls (minus a few frills/bows) and I'm sure you could get one with the characters that she likes?

pigsDOfly Fri 01-Apr-16 18:31:18

Don't think this would be a problem for me. She's still very young and I doubt most people in the swimming baths will even realise that there's a girl, rather than a boy, inside her swimming trunks.

PhoenixReisling Fri 01-Apr-16 18:32:06

I've bought a two piece and a one piece sunsuit in the past

SoddingPufflers Fri 01-Apr-16 18:32:52

She's 5 - what is the problem with spiderman or other swimming trunks?

PhoenixReisling Fri 01-Apr-16 18:34:11

Something like this perhaps?

Speckledpeckle Fri 01-Apr-16 18:34:25

Will have a look at shorts and vest combos although if I'm being honest I don't think it's the "modesty" element that's bothering me. I think it's the fact she IS a girl and girls wear costumes! If we were on holiday if have no problem letting her run around in just bottoms.. We swim at quite a "naice" pool and I suppose I'm a bit worried what others may think.. She wouldn't ever actually pass for a boy (much as she may want to!) she has long bum length hair so would just like a little girl in trunks which I suppose is exactly what she would be!

pinkyredrose Fri 01-Apr-16 18:34:30

What's wrong with trunks? If you'd let a 5 yr old boy wear them then you should let her.

SleepyForest Fri 01-Apr-16 18:34:52

Dd wore just bikini bottoms at that age, I would just let her wear trunks. Why not?

HeteronormativeHaybales Fri 01-Apr-16 18:35:47

Quite why she has to cover up her top half at 5, I am not sure (and don't get me started on bikinis for little girls). I'd have no problem with this. As she grows older, if she stays with her likes, she can be offered trunks/shorts with rash vest or an all-in-one as above.

3boys3dogshelp Fri 01-Apr-16 18:35:50

Op try they have a girls Batman swimsuit and a girls Lego swimsuit. I think I ordered goggles from there and the delivery was quick. Worth a try?

Sallyingforth Fri 01-Apr-16 18:36:06

However wearing swimming trunks feels a step to far.. I can't really articulate why.
Perhaps because there as no real reason not to.
Let her wear them - she'll very likely want to cover her top when she's a little older. For now, let her enjoy being a child..

LunaLunaLovegood Fri 01-Apr-16 18:36:40

I don't know. DD is similar but is 9 and if she asked I wouldn't let her because 9 is too old - however it's not actually like she's any more grown up that when she was 5 - so it's not just an age thing then. I mean she is still just a child so it should be fine for all children to just wear bottoms. But somehow it's not fine. I think I'd go with a boys set including rash vest like Pps have said.

HeteronormativeHaybales Fri 01-Apr-16 18:37:17

Interesting that she has long hair with such strong preferences for 'boys'' things - is that her choice? Just curious.

calamityjam Fri 01-Apr-16 18:37:31

Personally, I think it depends on your dd. Do you think it's just a phase? Because at 5 it doesn't really matter, but it will probably matter a few years down the line. Possibly if you say yes now then you may be setting yourself up for the same battle later on, which could be a lot more difficult.

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