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to get the rage at dotty dot dots in texts and emails

(34 Posts)
NeedMoreSleepOrSugar Wed 30-Mar-16 09:40:19

Maybe I'm getting old and grumpy as not only do I not understand them but they really do irritate me far more than is reasonable.

Why do people put random. ........ In texts and emails? I read them as passive aggressive pauses, even when the message is clearly friendly!

"Great....Thanks for doing that....I really appreciate your help......" is it just me that reads that as a pa message? (It absolutely wasn't)
"Hi. ...what time is the meeting at? ......I can't find my notes. ....."
"I'm back in the office on Friday. ....are you available to discuss X please. It shouldn't take long. ...I just need help understanding Y"

All received from people whose work involves writing to a very high standard. One is a notorious pedant. So is it just me who doesn't get the ........s? Am I just a silly old grump who needs to embrace the dotty dots? confusedgrin

NeedACleverNN Wed 30-Mar-16 09:43:10

Yabu......its people pausing wink

LittleRedSparke Wed 30-Mar-16 09:46:11

where are you getting " passive aggressive pauses" from?

AugustaFinkNottle Wed 30-Mar-16 09:47:47

YANBU. I don't know that I'd describe it as passive aggressive, but it's utterly pointless and irritating.

antiqueroadhoe Wed 30-Mar-16 09:49:00

Depends on context and knowledge of person. If they tend to be sarcastic and write Great.......thanks a lot....... then they probably are in their texts. If they are just trying to be casual and informal then probably not.

CuttedUpPear Wed 30-Mar-16 09:50:11

I'm with you OP. Hate it. Even my mother, who was a school teacher and a proof reader in her time, texts me in text speak.


AuldYow Wed 30-Mar-16 09:50:41

Oh hec, you'll hate me I'm dotty-tastic...grin

I use them when I'm....pausing or about to say something controversial or cheeky, embrace the...s

AntiquityReRises Wed 30-Mar-16 09:52:29


NeedMoreSleepOrSugar Wed 30-Mar-16 09:52:50

I don't know Little, they just seem that way. I can't really explain why as it doesn't even make sense to me; they just - are! grin (I know iabu - maybe thats why it annoys me!

MargaretHarborough Wed 30-Mar-16 09:55:30

It wouldn't be so bad if they could confine themselves to three dots at a time, but seemingly that's too much to ask.

bestcatintheworld Wed 30-Mar-16 09:55:38


NeedMoreSleepOrSugar Wed 30-Mar-16 09:55:51

Ahhhh I knew I'd get lots of dotty replies! That's just mean! grin

YogaPants Wed 30-Mar-16 09:56:50

Read up on ellipses for where they must have developed from.

However, I would argue that full stops or commas would work better in your example sentences except for "it shouldn't take long ...". In this case the ..... can be used to refer to an implied sentence left out along the lines of "but i don't understand this so it might actually take a little bit of time, sorry".

liinyo Wed 30-Mar-16 09:57:26

I use them a lot. My intention is to convey that my message is a suggestion, that I am open to intervention and alternative suggestions. I think your interpretation of them is more aggressive than my tentative dots but I will take note and use them more circumspectly in future. Or will I........?

NeedMoreSleepOrSugar Wed 30-Mar-16 09:59:42

Margaret yes! The message that sparked this thread has five sets of dots, each of a different length. The longest was nine dots WTF?

I was sad enough to count the characters and the dots. The dots made up almost a third of the message. Maybe the sender wants to make full use of her character limit on texts?

OneMagnumisneverenough Wed 30-Mar-16 09:59:43

I'm very guilty of it but not in work emails or texts to anyone, just in posts in social media/forums, usually when I am expecting someone to fill in the blanks. Such as I think that blah blah blah, but on the other hand.... grin or if I am making a joke such that I don't need to actually type the punchline.

AugustaFinkNottle Wed 30-Mar-16 10:00:40

I have nothing against ellipsis used properly, it's when they're used routinely instead of full stops and semi-colons that they're really irritating.

roundandroundthehouses Wed 30-Mar-16 10:03:17

I don't like it either, although I've never received anything work-related in that style. In our family it seems to be favoured by women aged 60+ but that may be coincidence.

To me it sounds faux-playful. I imagine the person doing an exaggerated wink between every sentence. In general I hate FB comments, etc., ending with an ellipsis, as it seems to demand that I add an equally 'witty' response instead of just liking and buggering off . Perhaps my dislike of them in emails stems from that.

NeedMoreSleepOrSugar Wed 30-Mar-16 10:10:23

yoga I don't mind properly used ellipses- its the nine miles long string of dotty dots that seem to serve no purpose.

But the 'open to suggestions' and other interpretations are much better than my pa reading of them (I do know that they are not actually pa by the way, my brain just initially 'reads' them in that way if that makes sense).

Ok IABU! I'm never going to use them, but I'll try to be a little more friendly to the little blighters in future. ......maybe. ......wink

TattyCat Wed 30-Mar-16 10:12:46

I don't mind them, but I do wish people would stop using more than 3!! That drives me to distraction.

junebirthdaygirl Wed 30-Mar-16 10:13:13

I used to do this a lot until l was seriously reprimanded on mumsnet so lm really trying to stop. It makes it seem more like a conversation that using my perfect grammar and full stops and capital letters. When l realised it drove people mad l stopped. My dsis does text speak and it makes me scream so l have sympathy and try to refrain. But it would be my natural inclination.

ClopySow Wed 30-Mar-16 10:15:14

I have a friend who posts every status on fb this...

Like it's part of a thought but not the whole lot. ...stop it...

TheDuchessOfArbroathsHat Wed 30-Mar-16 10:17:36

I do this a lot too. I have never ever done it with any P/A intention. I loathe textspeak but I don't see this as that - to me textspeak starts with the utterly ridiculous 'u' for you - because it takes so fucking long to type Y O U doesn't it? grin I'd like to say I'll stop because some on MN disapprove, but I'm afraid I won't............. grin

TheMaddHugger Wed 30-Mar-16 10:19:17

.............................. ok

i love dotty dotts grin

AlpacaLypse Wed 30-Mar-16 10:22:39

Yanbu about using more than three... grin

However I'll continue to use ellipsis as part of my digital punctuation armoury, especially now that EE charge 28p for every emoticon in texts, which is a medium I use a huge amount. Rural area and 4g coverage is erratic to put it mildly!

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