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To think oh's friends/relatives should put my name on any cards/gifts they send my toddler?

(51 Posts)
Hmm24 Thu 24-Mar-16 08:55:23

I think it's rude to just put my son's name/care of my husband or just my husband's name. I don't like the friend that does this and don't like being treated like I don't exist when it comes to my son.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Thu 24-Mar-16 08:57:05

Sounds rude.

I never put anyone else's name on the envelope though. Just the baby or child's.

KinkyAfro Thu 24-Mar-16 08:58:01

Seriously? It's not for you, it's for your son, what does it matter whose name is on it?!

Chocolatteaddict1 Thu 24-Mar-16 08:58:49

My mil is like this. It may be a mistake though, have you fallen out?

FiveSixPickUpSticks Thu 24-Mar-16 08:58:57

It isn't yours it is your sons. Can't see the issue tbh.

VimFuego101 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:00:38

MIL addresses presents to DS to him directly, or to DH. I've never even considered getting worked up about it. Do you have issues with these people in general?

XIsACunt Thu 24-Mar-16 09:01:04

I only ever put the DC name on cards and gifts even if I send it through the post.

I think your dislike of your OHs friend is affecting your view on this.

silverduck Thu 24-Mar-16 09:04:33

I sometimes only put my friend's names on things like that. It's because I want my friend to know I've thought of them and not have their DP open/give it to child and my friend never to know, especially when it's a birthday or new baby and lots of cards and gifts may be arriving. Although to be fair I am more likely to do this when I think their partner is not considerate.

IceMaiden73 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:05:37

What difference does it make? I doubt they do it just to annoy you

Paperchaserr Thu 24-Mar-16 09:06:46

If the friend or relative is more connected with me they might just use my name, if more OH's friend/rellie then maybe his. Or just DC's of course. No big deal either way. A back-story here?

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Thu 24-Mar-16 09:07:06

Why does it matter if it's addressed to or c/o your DH as long as DS gets it? Why does it need your name on it?

Hmm24 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:07:24

I would also put child's name and if c/o then c/o Mr and Mrs. My s.i.l
also does this. Don't people realise when it comes to children and the mum's at home it's c/o mum.

Lunar1 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:07:57

I just write the child's name on, if it's being posted I'd put the persons name on I had a connection with.

MrsSteptoe Thu 24-Mar-16 09:08:26

I would usually put the DC's name. I can see that I might put one parent's name on the outer wrapping of a package that I was sending through the post - no idea why I make a mental distinction between a package and an envelope, because I'd definitely put the child's name on an envelope through the post.

But if I were to put "Mrs S D" on a package that I was sending for her DC ("S" being primarily my friend who I knew long before she married), rather than "& Mr D D", it's hard to imagine Mr DD giving a rat's toss.

Something else is presumably going on here - perhaps you think the friend does not like you? you don't like them?

ThroughThickAndThin01 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:09:11

Why only c/o mum?

happyinherts Thu 24-Mar-16 09:09:50

Isn't the OP talking about the C/o just being her husband's name though - rather than either just being addressed to the toddler or jointly with her husband, which suggests she doesn't exist.

Yes, fully agree. I have a brother in law who addresses Christmas cards to just his brother and then puts and family inside. I think it's pure ignorance rather than anything sinister, but if you're a sensitive type it can come across as rude / demeaning. I doubt any harm intended.

Seeyounearertime Thu 24-Mar-16 09:11:18


i've seen some petty shit on AIBU in the last few months but i think this topic wins the most petty tbh.

Someone sends something to a child and doesn't include the mums name?
in the grand scheme of things, who gives a pile of gnats shit?

Hmm24 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:11:22

Just read comments... Thanks. Yes maybe I being a bit unreasonable, u just feel territorial about my son because I don't like these people and feel like they want to have a relationship with my husband and son whilst excluding me. Maybe IABU...

PurpleDaisies Thu 24-Mar-16 09:12:10

I think you're bring really precious. The present isn't for you-why should it have your name on it.

There must be some back story to this.

Hmm24 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:13:29

Thanks HappyinHerts

Only1scoop Thu 24-Mar-16 09:13:46

The DC name only surely

Would be a non issue IMO

londonrach Thu 24-Mar-16 09:13:58

Surely you just put the childs name as its his present.

MoggieMaeEverso Thu 24-Mar-16 09:14:46

Why shouldn't they have a relationship with your husband and son? You don't like them, they don't like you. It's okay, not everyone likes each other. As long as there's not some massive backstory like the "friend" is actually your husband's mistress, then YABU. Don't see as a personal slight, I'm sure it's not intended that way!

Hmm24 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:14:55

Oops toddler eating glacé cherries as I type so got to stop. Thanks all. Am being a bit precious I see that.

readyforno2 Thu 24-Mar-16 09:14:59

I would never put a parents name on a gift I was sending a child. My dc love getting packages in the mail so I presume other dc do too

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