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Sporners AIBU - DP with a TWO year old blackthorn in his knuckle

(96 Posts)
Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:08:46

Tree surgeon. Its just sat there floating around. When he makes a fist I can SEE it under the skin. You can move it around with your finger. A big lumpy blackthorn just sitting there waiting to come out...

AIBU to think he should let me get it out (not sure how, would probably need a scalpel). He 'hasn't got time to go to the GP'...can you imagine the gunk that will come out of it!

Shakirasma Mon 21-Mar-16 09:11:46

YANBU. He should let you do it, and film it for us all to see!

Lunar1 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:13:15

I think you should bring him to my house, I have a scalpel!!

drivingmisspotty Mon 21-Mar-16 09:13:25

Definitely should let you at it. (Be sure to post us pics) If not, LTB! (And find someone more gross who can fulfil your spornerish needs) wink

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:16:49

Fully intend to film it. He's the gift that keeps on giving, multiple thorns every week. One in his thigh last was beautiful.

Won't let me near the King thorn though.

Where do you buy a scalpel.....

LemonShizzleCake Mon 21-Mar-16 09:19:17

YANBU. Is there some kind of favour you can trade in order to be allowed to get at it? Ply him with booze? He is BVU to deprive the sporn community you of such an opportunity.

Not just place marking at all.

Oysterbabe Mon 21-Mar-16 09:24:56

How can he just get on with his life knowing it's there?!

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:26:23

He's worried it will hurt cutting the skin. Was thinking some of that numbing cream they use for injections would numb it....

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:27:40

Oyster I DON'T KNOW! I play with it all the time and he just tells me to leave it alone. Its been there so long he doesn't even care shock

FranksBobot Mon 21-Mar-16 09:28:24

Tell him to man up and let you at it! You do realise we need photographic evidence of King thorn?

Elledouble Mon 21-Mar-16 09:30:51

PICTURES. You know the rules!

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:32:17

I'm going to see if i can source a scalpel today, pharmacy?

Will take a pic of thorn in knuckle when he comes home

bumbleymummy Mon 21-Mar-16 09:34:22

Oooh! This sounds like it's going to be a good one! smile

<Not marking place at all. Nope. grin >

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:35:56

Google tells me an art shop would probably sell one for crafting purposes..that should do?

acasualobserver Mon 21-Mar-16 09:37:43

Can I ask what "sporner" means? (I did google without success.)

TheCrimsonPleb Mon 21-Mar-16 09:38:04

You can get scalpels from craft shops even from places like Rymans or larger WH Smiths. I use them for cutting paper but would not be keen to use one on a person. I sense I am missing the point of this thread though grin

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Mon 21-Mar-16 09:39:58

Oh this could be AMAZING!! Yes to the scalpel, get one today and film the extraction for us! <rubs hands together and grins manically>

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia Mon 21-Mar-16 09:40:33

a portmanteau + porn= sporn!

poundland sell sharp pokey pointy scalpelly things .....nice flame to sterilise and you are good to go!

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:41:59

Poor DP has no idea what he's coming home to

Maybe I'll cook something nice for dinner first grin

acasualobserver Mon 21-Mar-16 09:46:20

spot + porn= sporn!

Thank you. That's pretty niche but chacun à son goût and all that.

MimsyBorogroves Mon 21-Mar-16 09:47:36


Get him tonight.

InternalMonologue Mon 21-Mar-16 09:52:50

I am so disappointed that this thread is only from this morning - I have to wait a whole day for pictures <wail>

ElementaryMyDear Mon 21-Mar-16 09:54:15

Scalpels available here

Pantone363 Mon 21-Mar-16 09:58:47

I'm already breaking the rules posting in advance, I'll get kicked out of the sporners if I make everyone wait for an Amazon delivery!

Barmaid101 Mon 21-Mar-16 10:05:07

Shamelessly place marking! 🙈

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