So there's a woman at work who is more than pleasant and just generally nice. Doesn't seem to have any anxiety or social issues. Of course I wouldn't know that for sure though.
When she joined she asked me to go for lunch and I of course said yes as she was new and I wanted to be friendly.
Lunch was fine, she didn't talk much and I found myself searching for things to say but I sort of put that down to the fact she was new and was still finding her way around.
We've also had a few chats in the office at various times so it's not as if these lunches are the only time we speak. Again, after she says "how are you?" I get nothing from her in terms of small talk, yet she always approaches me and looks at me as if to say "go on" with my chat.
She then asked me again a few weeks later and although I wasn't massively up for it I went as again I wanted to be nice. Again, she didn't say much and I found myself constantly thinking of new topics. She also sort of didn't carry conversation on, so I'd bring something up and she wouldn't really continue it, or she wouldn't come up with any chat herself. I tried to ask questions to get more chat from her, but it was short sentence answers and then I'd be muddling for something else to say.
She then asked me for lunch again a month ago but I was on holiday so when I got back just had a reason to say - sorry but we must do this! Then just left it. I thought she'd just get from that that I wasn't too bothered and that would be it.
I thought I was the only one but in explaining my annoyance to another much closer work friend the other day, she then told me they'd gone out for lunch and shed found it painful.
Now she's asked for lunch again. To be honest, I just can't waste another hour on this. I'm now feeling like I just am entertaining her rather than it being any sort of discussion and feel like I'd rather just plough through my work. AIBU to dodge her again? Will it look too rude as we work together? Also - as a general rant here - I don't think she has any issues so why can't she make some damn conversation if she always asks me to go out? I don't think she's just "letting" me speak to be kind - there are times when there are periods of long (awkward) silence! She may be shy, but I feel I just need SOME HELP to carry on convo. Like I say, she's nice, I'd just rather not bother with these frustrating lunches which aren't getting any better!
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
That I expect her to make a bit more conversation?
46 replies
anotherusernameugh · 16/03/2016 11:26
OP posts:
Arfarfanarf ·
16/03/2016 11:55
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.