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To feel depressed about this

(4 Posts)
leeds84 Tue 15-Mar-16 11:15:15

Just found out a friend (let's call him Dave) is having affair, or at least has left his partner to start new relationship. My DH saw Dave with his arm round and holding hands with another woman (they all work together).

Dave has 2 very young kids. He's not a bad person. Obviously, I don't know the details and might be jumping to a lot of conclusions. I am aware of that.

This sort of stuff just always makes me feel so sad. Just makes me think how hard it is to make relationships work with all the stresses of life, plus probably doens't help that I'm currently pg.

I know it's not really any of my business / shouldn't take it on emotionally etc. It just makes me feel a bit sad really.

Tell me not all relationships end up down the pan when you have kids!

Quietwhenreading Tue 15-Mar-16 11:23:43

Of course it makes you sad, that's completely natural.

To make you feel better, my DH and I have been together since we were teenagers.

Our last ten years since we've had children have been our best. smile

leeds84 Tue 15-Mar-16 12:46:43

That's good to know!

I suppose you just need to trust your own relationship that it'll survive the stresses.

Quietwhenreading Tue 15-Mar-16 14:06:59

You have to put in the work though. Continual communication, make sure that resentments don't build up.

Try to make sure you parent jointly, let you partner change nappies and do the bath time routine, make sure you are both fully involved in key decisions, make sure that you are both in agreement about discipline etc

It's also important to take some time to be a couple as well as Mummy and Daddy. That doesn't necessarily mean finding a babysitter - it could just be Saturday night in front of the fire with a film and a takeaway. Making sure to ask about each other's days.

I'm sure you'll be fine - chat to your partner about it though.

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