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To think exDH's wife is a fucking loon

(300 Posts)
Redowlinmytree Mon 14-Mar-16 10:20:08

Last week I asked ex if he would mind chaining days this week so he has the kids tonight instead of Wednesday, he said fine no problem will have them both days instead will be nice to have them for an extra night.

There was no particular reason other than I've got a late GP appt and need DP to come too (couple issue!). Will be easier without DC. TBH I never ask ex to swap days around so this is a rarity. I didn't tell ex why I needed to swap although he did ask and I was vague!

Had a text from ex's wife this morning

Hi red, I know DH said we could have DC tonight, just wondering if it is urgent as we do have plans tonight. DH loves to see kids so doesn't like to say no, just wondered if we could do another night instead? {and some other stuff about a birthday coming up}

I text back saying no not really as we had plans, sorry if it was an inconvenience but ex seemed ok with it

Just had this reply: Yes well he doesn't like to say no to you or seeing the kids. To be fair think its a bit off asking us to have kids so you can celebrate steak and BJ night (guessing thats why you want the night off, ex said you were vague about why!) Apologies if i've got the wrong end of the stick but seems quite obvious to me. Anyway don't worry, we will be glad to have them, enjoy your night.

She's a fucking loon right?

ctjoy103 Mon 14-Mar-16 10:21:53

Yanbu, I would just say that your ex has agreed and you would prefer to communicate with him over your children.

pinkyredrose Mon 14-Mar-16 10:22:29

Wtf! She's a loon alright! Just text her back that's it's none of her business. Does she often interfere?

NoelHeadbands Mon 14-Mar-16 10:23:11

The S&BJ thing is a tad odd but no, the gist of it sounds ok really

Only1scoop Mon 14-Mar-16 10:23:17

Let dp sort it.

Sounds like he makes out he's a bit down trodden.

ElderlyKoreanLady Mon 14-Mar-16 10:23:18

Yep, she's a loon. Just text back saying:

Wrong end of the stick entirely. We don't restrict either steak or blowjobs to one day of the year.

Redowlinmytree Mon 14-Mar-16 10:23:35

I'm tempted to text back, well I've bought the steak now so seems like a waste not to eat it!

Pinkheart5915 Mon 14-Mar-16 10:26:32

yes she's a loon.

IMO the children you and he have are nothing to do with her.

You gave you husband plenty of notice to having the today, he agreed. She can suck it up

DoesAnyoneReadTheseThings Mon 14-Mar-16 10:26:33

Go with EKL response!

RhombusRiley Mon 14-Mar-16 10:26:41

OMG! Ugh.

If you don't mind them knowing, if you text back "Well actually it's a medical appointment that I can't take the kids to, but I didn't want to say" she'll feel awful.

Don't rise to it by getting arsey. She sounds pissed off that her H agrees to have his own kids over on a rare unexpected occasion. That's between them and you'll feel better if you stay on the moral high ground.

AliceThrewTheFookingGlass Mon 14-Mar-16 10:27:50

Wrong end of the stick entirely. We don't restrict either steak or blowjobs to one day of the year

Yes send this!

MoonfaceAndSilky Mon 14-Mar-16 10:28:07

To be fair think its a bit off asking us to have kids so you can celebrate steak and BJ night (guessing thats why you want the night off, ex said you were vague about why!) Apologies if i've got the wrong end of the stick but seems quite obvious to me shock

Yes loon! I assume your ex doesn't know she has texted you? Tell her it's all arranged now anyway.

maz210 Mon 14-Mar-16 10:28:42

Text back and say you've got no idea what steak and bj day is. Then when she explains you can respond with Elderly Korean Lady's comment about not restricting either so no need for a special occasion. Then apologise for spoiling her steak and blow job day as it's obviously important to her smile

VocationalGoat Mon 14-Mar-16 10:28:51

Christ what's wrong with people? confused
She's not dealt with her ex moving on at all.
You shouldn't communicate with each other, imo. I'm an ex wife and I wouldn't dream of bothering my ex's partners.
I've been divorced 13 years and have never texted or been texted by ex husband's partner(s).
Boundaries.
Here's a perfect example as to why you need to draw them up and keep things distant and 'professional' with your ex.His current wife sounds odd nasty and you don't need that in your home.

SirChenjin Mon 14-Mar-16 10:29:39

Agree with Rhombus. Don't sink to her level, tempting though it might be. Either say it's a medical appointment that you both need to attend or ignore. Don't feed the drama llama, as they say.

VinceNoirLovesHowardMoon Mon 14-Mar-16 10:29:49

Forward it to the ex and ask him to tell his wife not to get involved from now on. What a stupid twat.

PhoenixReisling Mon 14-Mar-16 10:29:56

I don't think YABU, he is their father and why wouldn't you ask him? From how he responded to the request, he seemed very happy to see his children and have them for a little longer than you asked.

She is probably pissed off that he didn't check with her first why should he and probably annoyed that he wanted them for two nights instead of the one.

I would text your ex and tell him that any discussions about changes in access is really between the both of you and you don't appreciate arsey texts messages from his wife, implying that you are dumping your children on them so you can have steak and a BJ.

VocationalGoat Mon 14-Mar-16 10:31:04

Just reread my post...I'm implying that SHE is bothering you, NOT the other way around. flowers
Steak and BJ? Ffs honestly. confused
Ugh. I really feel for you.
Stick to your guns and draw a line in the sand. Don't communicate with her...only with your ex regarding contact.

HooseRice Mon 14-Mar-16 10:31:07

Your ex's new DP is value for money that's for sure.

curren Mon 14-Mar-16 10:31:31

She's not dealt with her ex moving on at all.

It's the ops ex's wife

Owllady Mon 14-Mar-16 10:32:08

I can't stand people like this, they're his kids ffs and its none of her business. She's just being spiteful

MrsDeathOfRats Mon 14-Mar-16 10:33:38

I would screen shot it and send it to ex saying you don't appreciate her messages and can he ask her to stay out of it in future please.
I wouldn't reply to her at all. Let her think she has 'won' with her classy message until her husband comes home all annoyed at her for sending those messages and trying to get rid of his kids for an extra night.

PennyDropt Mon 14-Mar-16 10:35:24

Of course it's her business as she is in the house too and might have to change her plans to accept. But it's between her and ex NOT about you or what you are doing.

Don't reply as it leaves her looking the loon not you.

ElderlyKoreanLady Mon 14-Mar-16 10:35:24

There are definitely people here with far more self restraint than me grin I'd have to answer. Just the once, mind. Only after that would I message the ex to establish that she has no place in arrangements for the children.

PhoenixReisling Mon 14-Mar-16 10:35:41

Have you thought that maybe she had planned to have steak and a BJ on the night your ex agreed to have the children grin

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