7 years ago me and DH got married. It wasn't a big affair - a registry office ceremony followed by a catered buffet and drinks at our home. This was what we wanted - we decided and set the date for 8 weeks later (no reason for the quick date, just decided it was what we wanted) and we so grateful for the presence of those that could make it (and grateful for the well wishes we received from those that couldn't make it). Overall it was a good day (a few hiccups along the way but hey, stuff happens). My mum had our daughter (well my daughter, husbands step daughter but he raises her as his own) and it would have been the first night we had all night alone - since dating and eventually moving in together (we weren't having a honeymoon). The problem arose when my sister had far too much to drink. I said to her then boyfriend that he was more than welcome to leave the car at our house and my husband could come collect him in the morning for him to pick up the car (my sister was drinking and he was on soft drinks so that he could get them back to the hotel they were staying at). She completely wigged out that I had told him that he could leave the car and not said it to her. She kicked off so much that the whole affair ended with the police at our house and us putting her boyfriend up on our couch (she went back to the hotel).
So fast forward to now, she is getting married and I don't want to go to the wedding as she has never even apologized about what happened and the way she behaved. When asked whether we could make her wedding, told her no and told her why (no apology) and she completely ignored my response - just started saying how busy she is and how she hasn't got two minutes to rub together hence why she hasn't been to our house (which is fine, would quite happily go no contact but she keeps getting in touch).
My mother says I am being unreasonable for not going with my husband and children, as all she will have family wise at the wedding is her, my brother, nan and uncle who lives with nan. So am I being UR or not?
Sorry for such long post and any typos and grammatical errors - trying to be quick as computer keeps switching itself off mid task!
AIBU?
Waiting for apology for sister's jezza kyle style behaviour at wedding
Wannabees · 13/03/2016 00:45
YABU to use her not apologising as the reason not to go to her wedding, surely if you got on it'd be irrelevant after 7 years, it looks an implausible excuse and like you've waited all that time to punish her.
If you don't like her and don't want to go it'd probably be better to say so rather than look as though you've scrabbled around for a reason and that's the best you could come up with.
I don't have anything against remembering what a twat someone is for 7 years (I have a good memory), but if that was the last time she fucked you off and she was pissed as well, I think that's pretty good going actually for a family member 
It does all seem a bit JK, but from you aswell as her 
The grudge has clearly been hanging over you for 7 years?! Either say yes or no, no real need to drag the dramas from nearly a decade up. You've said no. Leave it at that, it's really nothing to do with your mum.
If you were wanting an apology, you should have asked for it years ago. It's petty to not go because you never received an apology. You can not want to go for any reason, which is fine. You don't need to rake up the past unless you want more drama and attention about your wedding. Which was 7 years ago!
Yes, seven years is an awful long time to hold a grudge, and I feel like a completely childish, idiot for having a grudge for so long - but I just can't get past that she has no remorse for her actions - not so much as a sheepish apology (better than nothing) and my wedding day will forever have hanging over it the police being at my home because she was knocking back alcohol like it was going out of fashion. I will never have that day again, which is fine - I did the most important thing - I married my husband. But still, her actions and the consequences of her actions hurt and the fact that now she wants me to come and play happy families on her wedding day and swoon at how amazing her day is - doesn't appeal and being told by my mother that I am being unreasonable for not doing so makes me want to internally scream. I guess I am just bitter 
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