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to do this?

(20 Posts)
FlyingRussianUnicorn Sat 12-Mar-16 23:38:54

I live at home with my parents.

Finally got a part time job two days a week. Pay is quite good and there's opportunity for overtime so while my standard take home pay a month will be about £300 it will go up in holidays and surrounding special occasions.

I havent worked for 6 years due to MH issues. My parents havent charged me rent and pay for all bills and insure a car for me (vital where we live as we are rural with little public transport). I am grateful truly I am and try to make it up to them as much as possible by doing a lot of housework, running errands for them, doing the shopping etc.

Would it be unreasonable for me to save money to put towards me moving out and getting my own place in the future rather than paying rent? They havent asked for any (they are a lot more easy going over this than they used to be tbh) but id hate one day in the future for them to say how could you afford to save for a house deposit all this time and not pay rent?

If its unanimous "your taking the piss" then I will talk to them about it

FlyingRussianUnicorn Sat 12-Mar-16 23:39:58

Oh should add- I will be paying my own car insurance from now on and all personal expenses have always been mine- ie always paid my own phone, petrol, clothes, days out etc

RoseDeWittBukater Sat 12-Mar-16 23:41:17

I think you should discuss with them,it's only polite as they've been so helpful.

RJnomore1 Sat 12-Mar-16 23:41:35

If you were my child is be happy with this as long as I wasn't really struggling to house and feed you right now but I'd prefer it if you spoke to me about it like an adult.

hownottofuckup Sat 12-Mar-16 23:41:37

I think that's totally reasonable and what I would expect from my own DC.

Leeds2 Sat 12-Mar-16 23:41:49

I think I would contribute something. Or at least ask them if they wanted me to?

trappedinsuburbia Sat 12-Mar-16 23:42:50

Why don't you talk to them about it anyway, they might be happy that your saving for your own place or they might want a token contribution? I think you need to offer anyway, or at least start paying for your own bills/car?

Stratter5 Sat 12-Mar-16 23:43:34

You need, as a minimum, to pay for what you use and eat. At least offer to pay rent, and make it clear you'll be contributing towards food and utilities. They may well refuse, but you need to offer.

BieneBiene Sat 12-Mar-16 23:44:28

Congratulations on the job flowers

I think I would offer to pay them something.

Alisvolatpropiis Sat 12-Mar-16 23:44:35

I'd discuss it with them, as a pp said it is the polite thing to do.

Well done on getting the job!

PennyHasNoSurname Sat 12-Mar-16 23:50:27

It would be good to offer, but if I were in your shoes Id suggest that in leui of rent (as its low income and very oart time), that I do the housekeeping.

If you get a good oay one month through overtime etc.maybe treat them to dinner?

FlyingRussianUnicorn Sun 13-Mar-16 00:04:36

Thanks all and for the congrats- im chuffed someone has finally given me a chance . Will talk to them about it.

MirriVan Sun 13-Mar-16 00:11:45

Yes, you just need to talk to them.
Say that you'd like to start saving to move out, but that you're also happy to contribute - though that will obviously mean that it will take longer for you to get your savings built up.
Then, if they could do with the cash and don't mind you staying longer they can take the contribution - if they'd rather you became independent faster they might be willing to forgo rent and expenses.
Congrats on the job, hope it all goes well.

expatinscotland Sun 13-Mar-16 00:13:38

I would talk to them about it.

Fatmomma99 Sun 13-Mar-16 00:18:01

congrats on the job, and yes - as others have said - have a conversation!

Sounds like things are on the up for you!

AcrossthePond55 Sun 13-Mar-16 00:55:04

Our children were required to 'pay rent' when they worked and lived at home. But unbeknownst to them it went into an earmarked account and when they moved out we gave the money back to them for rent & utility deposit. We didn't need the money but we wanted them to understand that once you're earning, you need to contribute.

Talk to your parents. If they need the money to keep their heads above water (and it doesn't sound like they do) then it's only fair that you contribute to the running of the household. But if they don't need the money, perhaps you could suggest the above arrangement.

yorkshapudding Sun 13-Mar-16 01:09:44

Many congrats on the job flowers

I agree you need to sit down and have an honest conversation with your parents. Explain to them that you appreciate all they have done and that you are more than happy to make a contribution but that you are also tying to be sensible in planning ahead for the future. What you've suggested doesn't sound at all unreasonable as long as your parents are not struggling financially.

Best of luck with the new job. A fresh start is a wonderful thing smile

Brokenbiscuit Sun 13-Mar-16 08:41:09

I think it would be perfectly reasonable to ask your parents how they would feel about what you propos

Brokenbiscuit Sun 13-Mar-16 08:42:33

Oops, posted too soon! Anyway, reasonable to ask what they think, as long as you are happy to go with whatever they suggest.

Best of luck with the new job - congratulations!smile

bornwithaplasticspoon Sun 13-Mar-16 08:59:03

Well done on the job smile

Definitely talk to your parents about this. I suppose it depends on how long the situation will go on for. In the long run it's beneficial to your parents for you to move out (not saying they want you out but at some point it's natural to want your children to be independent!) so if you live rent free that will come sooner. However, if they find finances a struggle now or at some future point you may have to chip in.

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