I am friendly with a group of 8 other women. We all met when our DCs were little and still regularly meet up, mainly now for evenings out or the occasional lunch/coffee during the day when we are all available/off work. We also have a Facebook group where we can chat about things and also make arrangements.
One friend is a total and utter drama queen, always with some crisis or another, yet also with a very superior attitude as though she is better than others. As a result of both of these things, I am finding that everything is revolving around her and her problems/moans/wants. I'll refer to her as Caroline in this thread.
I have never really received any support from any of the others in the group. For example last year a family member of mine was really ill and had to be rushed to hospital for emergency surgery and needed a lot of care afterwards from me. I posted about this in our Facebook group at the time and out of 8 others only 2 replied and they were very quick abrupt "Oh no" type replies rather than anything truly supportive or caring. When I next saw all of the others not one person asked me about my family member or how things were going. Caroline has crisis after crisis, which are usually very mundane day to day things that the rest of us would just suck up and get on with, and each and every time she gets lots of replies and support. One of Caroline's children only has to have a sniffle and everyone else is offering to take her other children to school, asking if she needs anything from the shop, and offering to help her.
I have also noticed that if anyone else has anything going on, then Caroline appears out of the woodwork with yet another crisis or problem to basically try to trump whatever is going on in someone else's life. So everyone else gets forgotten and all focus is on her.
When we all meet in person it is getting more and more ridiculous as conversations are literally dominated by Caroline's problems and moans, with everyone listening sympathetically and offering support. Caroline is a very earth mothery type and the others all seem to look up to this and put her on a pedestal. She is quite disparaging about others who parent different to her.
I am getting to the point where I am fed up, and bored, of everything being about Caroline all the bloody time! I don't want to distance myself from them in one way as I've known them for years but it is all very irritating and doing my head in! I could meet up with others individually I know, but it puts me off that they are so simpering and arse licking towards Caroline all the time. Plus of course it puts me off them that none of them could offer me any support when I really needed it.
Has anyone else come across a situation like this? What did you do?
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Please
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AIBU?
To distance myself from this group of friends as everything revolves around one person?
35 replies
FirstToothOut · 12/03/2016 12:36
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