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cancelled plans on friend now she is ignoring me

(92 Posts)
orangjuicelover Fri 11-Mar-16 17:10:43

Maybe i am being unreasonable but.........

Today we made plans to meet up and go have something to eat, it was a short notice kind of thing.
I have been busy this week as i had just come off holiday two weeks ago and im catching up on bills/money matters/other stuff.
I booked to have my hair coloured and the hairdressers could only do it today so I cancelled the plans with my friend.
She messaged me back saying "ok cool"

It seemed blunt so i said to her i can meet her after the hairdressers and cancel to plumber who was meant to come in the afternoon and we can meet but she just said "no next week is fine"

I then asked her if she wanted to come wireless as the tickets were going on sale today and she has ignored me but has been seen on whatsapp. She just read it and ignored it.

Shes obviously pissed off, was I wrong here?

Im kind of guessing something is going on in her life which is negative because the day after I came back from holiday she was asking me to come out and before I left was complaining about her DP

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Fri 11-Mar-16 17:12:48

Mates come before hair.

Especially mates who are going through a rough time.

theycallmemellojello Fri 11-Mar-16 17:19:17

She might be a bit pissed off, but I'm sure she'll get over it. Just apologise next time you see her. I think you're probably reading too much into this. Are you quite young?

ilovesooty Fri 11-Mar-16 17:30:01

I think I'd be ignoring you in her position. You cancelled your meeting with her for a hairdressing appointment after all.

HappinessLivesHere Fri 11-Mar-16 17:33:16

Seems strange priorities to me!

OurBlanche Fri 11-Mar-16 17:34:08

And by the same standards a good mate would understand that sometimes you just have to get hair, bills and plumbers sorted.

Friendship is a 2 way street, after all!

zodiackelly Fri 11-Mar-16 17:35:18

I don't think what you did was rude or unreasonable, sometimes you have to switch things around because there's not many other options, I'd never get anything done if I cancelled something every time a friend wanted to meet!

Perhaps something has happened and she's a little down, so she might not be in the best spirits, but I'm sure you'll find out for yourself! smile

PaulAnkaTheDog Fri 11-Mar-16 17:35:20

You bumped your friend so you could get a haircut. It wouldn't bother me but I can understand why it might bother others.

WipsGlitter Fri 11-Mar-16 17:35:46

This is the problem with everyone being available all the time we all expect instantaneous answers. Let her have a think and get back to you in her own time a day stop stalking her on social media.

OurBlanche Fri 11-Mar-16 17:35:51

Really, Happiness?

Organising stuff that is timebound by someone elses business availability before meeting a mate is strange?

Mmmm! Glad neither my friends nor I think that way!

BedTimeNow Fri 11-Mar-16 17:36:58

The way she's replying to your messages is bothering you, as deep down you must feel a bit bad for cancelling on a friend who you say yourself is going through something negative.

bibbitybobbityyhat Fri 11-Mar-16 17:42:30

Dear God, I received a text from a friend on 8 March at 17.21 (just checked) inviting me out for a lunch. I replied on 10 March at 21.21 saying lovely, where shall we go? She hasn't replied yet grin. Shall I assume she's ignoring me?

VoldysGoneMouldy Fri 11-Mar-16 17:43:17

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

eddielizzard Fri 11-Mar-16 17:49:14

you shouldn't have cancelled, but you did try quite hard to re-arrange.

give her a couple of days and then ask for lunch.

she might not be responding for all sorts of reasons. don't take offence, as you're imagining she has!

witsender Fri 11-Mar-16 17:52:21

Cancelling for hair was pretty lame.

shinynewusername Fri 11-Mar-16 17:53:33

Very rude to just cancel. You should have rung her, explained about the hairdresser only being able to do today, then asked if she minded postponing.

gingerboy1912 Fri 11-Mar-16 17:53:49

How much notice did u give your friend.?

BastardGoDarkly Fri 11-Mar-16 17:54:37

If I thought my friend had been having a tough time for at least 3 weeks, my hair could wait.

Lucyccfc Fri 11-Mar-16 17:57:42

Rude of you to cancel, but maybe you are being a bit paranoid. If she has to pay out for tickets, maybe she needs to check her finances.

expatinscotland Fri 11-Mar-16 18:01:35

You sound flakey as hell. Dump the mate to get your hair done, then offer to cancel the plumber.

longdiling Fri 11-Mar-16 18:01:53

It reads to me like you know you've been a bit shitty and now you're desperate for reassurance. Her reply to your text cancelling plans is fine, as is her next one reassuring you that next week is fine. Now you want an immediate answer to your third text so you can reassure yourself she's not pissed off. Give her a break will you?

Tummyclutter Fri 11-Mar-16 18:04:59

I see nothing wrong with cancelling because you could get a hair appointment. It wouldn't bother me if you were my friend.
You lost my sympathy at the Whatsapp mention though. Unless you are a teenager, you need to grow up!

StitchesInTime Fri 11-Mar-16 18:05:26

If I made plans to meet up with a friend for lunch, and they dumped me to get their hair done, I'd be pissed off about it. It's pretty rude.

Trollicking Fri 11-Mar-16 18:08:10

sorry but I think ywbu, I'm happy for friend to cancel when things come up but I think your were a bit hmm in these circumstances.

MsJamieFraser Fri 11-Mar-16 18:11:10

Indont think YABU, however it's not nice to come second best because you didn't plan ahead, however in my job, it's in my contract that I cannot have roots... So if this is the case with yours then you are not BU on that front.

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