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To send my daughters to go underwear shopping together?

(38 Posts)
madimia Sun 06-Mar-16 20:19:21

Have two DD's who are 15 and 11 and very close - talk to each other about anything.

A few weeks ago I decided it was time a good time for DD2 to start wearing some underwear crop tops - cross between vest and bra. Had a quick chat with DD2 about it and she was comfortable with it. That same weekend they decided to go clothes shopping together.

I suggested to DD1 and DD2 (both in private) that they could get these crop tops together while on the clothes shopping trip, and it was fine if they said they wouldn't feel comfortable. DD1 said she would love to take DD2 and DD2 said it would be great to go with DD1. So they did, and DD1 helped DD2 pick out some lovely ones from M&S. Nice bonding experience for both girls.

Was chatting to my own sister yesterday about it as she too has daughters, although they are grown up. She was flabbergasted that I had sent DD1 and DD2 to get the crop tops together, said that I was neglecting DD2 (confused) as it was a mother daughter thing, said that I had been unreasonable to ask DD1 to do it instead and it would have been embarrassing for both of them.

Am not that bothered as what's done can't be undone, but I was wondering - was I being really unreasonable to ask them to do this? Thanks.

EatShitDerek Sun 06-Mar-16 20:20:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RaeSkywalker Sun 06-Mar-16 20:21:38

I think it's nice! You checked that both girls were happy with it, and they were.

WorraLiberty Sun 06-Mar-16 20:21:43

Of course you weren't being unreasonable and I'm sure you know it.

Not sure what your sister's problem is, but it's not worth giving her opinion another thought.

Sparklingbrook Sun 06-Mar-16 20:22:21

No not unreasonable. Stop telling your sister stuff.

SukeyTakeItOffAgain Sun 06-Mar-16 20:22:34

That's a lovely sisterly bonding thing to suggest. Your DS is talking nonsense.

soundsystem Sun 06-Mar-16 20:23:12

Not unreasonable at all. I have a younger sister and we did this when we were that age.

DramaAlpaca Sun 06-Mar-16 20:24:18

It was a lovely thing for your DDs to do together, not unreasonable for you to suggest this at all.

TheWeeBabySeamus1 Sun 06-Mar-16 20:25:30

I'd have been a lot more comfortable going bra shopping with my sister than my mum... and it sounds like they had a lovely day together. YANBU smile

Pinkheart5915 Sun 06-Mar-16 20:27:03

I think it's good dd2 talks to dd1 about everything.
I also think it's lovely they would Go underwear shopping together, sometimes you don't want to do that with your mum I know I didn't.
Not unreasonable at all

SitsOnFence Sun 06-Mar-16 20:27:31

Sounds lovely to me. Wish I'd had a big sister to share that kind of thing with!

pippistrelle Sun 06-Mar-16 20:27:37

it would have been embarrassing for both of them

I can't even begin to imagine how. Is your sister in some sort of Victorian re-enactment society?

kawliga Sun 06-Mar-16 20:29:44

As they often say on here, how is your relationship with your sister usually? Do the two of you have different parenting styles? Does she have form for finding fault in your parenting?

FarelyKnuts Sun 06-Mar-16 20:30:58

Your sister is a tool! Daughters were fine AND you were fine with it until she gave an unsolicited opinion on the matter.

Witchend Sun 06-Mar-16 20:36:04

I got my first crop top with friends. Fun and much less embarrassing (until we saw a boy we knew anyway).
I was suggesting to my pair they could go together to get new bras the other day as they both need them. They said as long as I don't send ds with them too. grin

Lopperlady1 Sun 06-Mar-16 20:37:52

I think it sounds lovely for your daughters to go together. It's wonderful they get on well and enjoy spending time together. And you spoke to them first and they were happy. Your sister is being silly.

ScarlettDarling Sun 06-Mar-16 20:47:02

In which universe would anyone consider this to be unreasonable?! confused

Your sister is being ridiculous! You didn't send your daughter bra shopping with the man who works in the chippy round the corner, she went with her big sis. A completely normal thing to do in my opinion.

Fairenuff Sun 06-Mar-16 20:48:30

Is buying underwear a thing now? confused

It all sounds very involved. I usually just pick up stuff for dcs when I'm out.

3BusyBabies Sun 06-Mar-16 20:51:00

Your sister is being ridiculous!
I haven't read the whole thread so sorry if I'm repeating but they're only cropped vests for Christ's sake, the clue being that you buy them by age not bra size. No measuring involved and by no means a first bra!!!
I think it's lovely that your daughters went shopping together at all.

Sparklingbrook Sun 06-Mar-16 20:52:53

I thought that Fair. I have DSs and have missed out on the buying crop tops excitement and angst. sad

BillBrysonsBeard Sun 06-Mar-16 20:53:32

Don't give it another thought OP, what a lovely idea. I'd have felt much more comfortable going with my sister as that's who I'd be looking up to at that age. Your sister is strange.

Gileswithachainsaw Sun 06-Mar-16 20:55:31

I hope mine get on that well at 11 and 15.

nothing wrong here at all she's crazy.

BonitaFangita Sun 06-Mar-16 20:56:16

I'm scratching my head at this, your daughters agreed to go and enjoyed their shopping trip. What business is it of your sister? Does she often try to undermine you? Don't give this a second thought.

PacificDogwod Sun 06-Mar-16 20:57:00

Not unreasonable at all, sounds lovely all round smile

I have to confess that I don't get the need for cropped tops though - either a girl needs a bra or she doesn't, no? confused
Anyway, they were both happy, that's all that matters. Your sister can/could do whatever she feels is right.

TheFairyCaravan Sun 06-Mar-16 21:00:08

Ignore your sister. Your DDs sound like they have a lovely relationship, long may it continue.

I have DSs who are 19&21, they have different lives and live miles apart but they are best friends and do loads together when they can. I think it's great.

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