My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To feel miserable on mothers day

16 replies

Danlsb · 06/03/2016 09:18

Aibu to feel really sad today? I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks 12 days ago. I have been trying to stay upbeat and positive especially around dd who is 2yrs but struggle when she is in bed. DH has invited his mother and sister to spend Mother's Day afternoon with us ( I over heard MIL saying to DH that she hoped I was not going to still be moping about and ruin the day) my SIL does not have children or any plans to have any. The whole Mother's Day thing seems to have amplified things and I have spent 'my special lie in' in tears. I know I need to move on but I really miss my baby but other than my mum and friend no one else seems to think baby mattered. DH said he was sad but is looking forward to trying again!

OP posts:
Report
TwoKettles · 06/03/2016 09:21

Sorry to hear of your loss. You are likely to still be raging with hormones as well as grieving so do be kind to yourself. Your MIL sounds like a charmer! Do what YOU want, today and ignore the old trout. It's your Mothers Day too!

Report
GreyAndGoldInTheMeadow · 06/03/2016 09:22

Sorry you're feeling down, and that you have such an insensitive mil. Be kind to yourself today and know thousands of others are struggling today aswel. It's okay to feel sad after what you've been through.

Report
kittybiscuits · 06/03/2016 09:22

Poor you. It's a very tough day and no wonder. Is your MIL normally vile? Did you tell your DH what you heard? He sounds highly insensitive, at best. Do what you need to do today and don't worry about anyone else Flowers

Report
Lilipot15 · 06/03/2016 09:23

Flowers for you. Your MIL sounds a piece of work. None of her business if you are "moping" anyway.
Of course it will bring up emotions. Do you have to have the family over if you're feeling rotten? Maybe it would be better if you DH and DD went out for a walk or did something that would make you all smile.

Report
EnjoyTheSimpleThingsInLife · 06/03/2016 09:23

YANBU at all. Sorry to hear about your miscarriage Flowers

Of course you will still feel upset, you're probably still in shock and it is a hard thing to go through. Ignore people who say you need to "get over it".

Look after yourself and just try to relax today x

Report
Chamonix1 · 06/03/2016 09:24

ThanksOP,yadnbu! Of course your baby matters, I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mil sounds very insensitive & you would have probably benefited with this Mother's Day just with the three of you this year. Xx

Report
StephenKatz · 06/03/2016 11:13

Your MIL sounds like an absolute cow. Flowers Cake for you OP.

Report
chelle792 · 06/03/2016 11:15

How insensitive.

I would be two weeks from my due date now.

It's not easy

Report
PrincessMouse · 06/03/2016 11:20

Flowers I am sorry Op. You lost a baby, you have a right to be really upset. Your MIL sounds like a real nasty woman. If she can't be supportive then she should stay well away. I hope your DH defended you and in your position I would find it hard not to tell her straight

Flowers

Report
Noisytraffic · 06/03/2016 11:23

Flowers What a witch! I hope DH put her in her place.

Report
NeedACleverNN · 06/03/2016 11:24

If you want to mourn you mourn.

I lost my baby at only 6-7 weeks of pregnancy and that rocked me and my dh hard. not helped by the fact my mil tried to commit suicide because we didn't tell her first took us a long time to get over it.

Tell you dh you over heard what your mil said and that it was out of order

Report
FuckYouJamieOliver · 06/03/2016 11:37

So sorry for you
I had the ' hasn't she got over that yet ' comment
Fuck your Mil , uninvited her or go out

Report
diddl · 06/03/2016 11:46

Your husband sounds as heartless as his mum.

Can he not go over to them?

Report
BillBrysonsBeard · 06/03/2016 11:51

What an awful, insensitive comment from your MIL. Even if she thought you couldn't hear, she shouldn't even be thinking that. You 'mope' all you want OP, sorry for your loss Flowers

Report
yorkshapudding · 06/03/2016 12:02

Your MIL is a twat Flowers
In your shoes I would tell your DH that you heard what she said and that for this reason I would not be at home during her visit.

Report
Danlsb · 06/03/2016 20:19

Thank you all for your support. Unfortunately MIL is a bit of a cow not that DH can see it. Hasn't been too bad as dd and cleaning kept me occupied. Dd is a great escape from having to spend too much time around mil !

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.