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to be in love with a 16 year old

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MNHQ have commented on this thread.

swordandsparrow Fri 04-Mar-16 12:47:18

Im 23 with one child whos nearly 2.
He is 16, nearly 17 but has a proper baby face and could easily pass for 13 if he wasnt so tall.
We met at college where I study as a mature student.
Am i wrong to pursue this relationship, i really like him and we get on great but my friend at college says its wrong and i am too old for him sad

babyboyHarrison Fri 04-Mar-16 12:50:27

Its a little strange as he's so young at the moment but the actual number of years age difference isn't that much. Maybe keep in touch with him and if sometiing is meant to be it could happen in a few years time.

5madthings Fri 04-Mar-16 12:51:22

Yabu to pursue a relationship yes, he may be a mature 16 but he is still 16. My ds1 is same age and very mature for his age but still would not be ready for a relationship with someone of that age with a child. He might like playing the grown up and be infatuated by it but in reality he is not mature enough at all despite being a very sensible boy.

If you really love him leave him alone and wait until he is 18 at least and see how you feel then.

TooOldForGlitter Fri 04-Mar-16 12:52:12

If this is serious....yes, you are too old for him. Stay friends for a couple of years until he has had chance to mature.

DixieNormas Fri 04-Mar-16 12:52:16

you want a relationship with a 16 year old who looks 13 hmm ok then

IlikePercyPig Fri 04-Mar-16 12:52:30

I know plenty of couples with bigger age gaps.

FigMango1 Fri 04-Mar-16 12:52:49

Er yes Yabu. I doubt any 16yo would want to get involved with anyone with a child.

Shinyshoes2 Fri 04-Mar-16 12:53:21

As a mother of an 18 year old who's being pursued by a 26 year old Id say yes ! Stay away !
But perhaps i'm biased
Yknow that 16 year olds can't leaglly get married , vote , buy alcohol , cigarettes or a scratch card , enter a betting shop
This tells me that tgis 'child' is not an adult

TooOldForGlitter Fri 04-Mar-16 12:53:42

I know plenty of couples with age gaps too PercyPig, me and my husband included, but 16? Come on.

Shinyshoes2 Fri 04-Mar-16 12:54:59

Nowadays you can't leave education until your 18 so in theory they're stil in school
And why would you be attracted to someone that looks 13 !

DustyBustle Fri 04-Mar-16 12:55:25

Don't be daft

defineme Fri 04-Mar-16 12:55:56

I would leave it. There is a big difference between a 16 year old and a twenty something. ..he was legally a child last year. Someone his age doesn't need a relationship with someone that would potentially set them up with stepchildren etc-would you want that for your child when they're 16?
Use your head and leave it.

waitingforsomething Fri 04-Mar-16 12:56:08

Yes it's too young. Not the actual age gap but 16 is very young in terms of maturity. I would be leaving well alone until he's at least 18

Fuzz01 Fri 04-Mar-16 12:56:21

No thats totally wrong hes a child. I you think about the fact he would of been 13/14 years old when you had your child! I would not be happy if i had a 16 year old son and there was a 23year old with a 2year old. He isn't old enough to drink,smoke etc. It's different if he was an adult but hes a teenager.

attheendoftheday Fri 04-Mar-16 12:56:50

He's a child and I think you should stay away!

In a couple of years if you still feel the same think about it then.

WorraLiberty Fri 04-Mar-16 12:57:42

Yes it's wrong and the fact that he looks 13 makes it sound a bit pervy.

NerrSnerr Fri 04-Mar-16 12:58:22

In theory it's ok but is he mature enough to be in a relationship with someone with a child? It is odd you'd fancy someone who looks 13 though, has he even gone through puberty if he looks so young?

Justforthisfred Fri 04-Mar-16 12:58:33

I am surprised that you even need to ask. He's a 16 year old KID, you are not.

squoosh Fri 04-Mar-16 12:58:46

The age gap is fine.

But not at this stage in your lives. Put him out of your mind.

SaggingTits Fri 04-Mar-16 12:59:05

Yanbu to feel that way but I'm also 23 and really cannot imagine going out with a 16yo. It's not a huge age difference but big difference maturity wise, especially as you are a parent.

Sparklingbrook Fri 04-Mar-16 12:59:13

AS the parent of a 16 year old DS I would say a big no.

And YY the 'easily pass as a 13 year old' is not great.

PaulAnkaTheDog Fri 04-Mar-16 12:59:16

You're attracted to someone who looks 13?!

Bonkerz Fri 04-Mar-16 12:59:50

At 16 I was dating a 29 year old. We were together for 3 years. Love of my life.

WorraLiberty Fri 04-Mar-16 13:00:04

And "In love"


bogofeternalstench Fri 04-Mar-16 13:00:08

I met my husband when he was 16 & I was older than 23. He's now in his 20s and we don't get the raised eyebrows or outright condemnation anymore, thankfully. Sometimes it works. Depends very much on the people involved. Just be prepared for a bumpy ride if you do pursue a relationship with him.

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