To ask for your SCBU experiences ?

[Onthedowns]

My little boy born Tuesday dead on 35 weeks, good weight 6.11 but taken to ScBU. He is tube fed and sleeping otherwise doing well. I am going home tomorrow as have a DD at home my DH is going to try and work next week to save paternity leave till he comes home. I am trying to express but getting very little. I am also dreading leaving him! It's bad enough he's not on same ward as me! I know some babies are much more poorly but I struggling with going home!

[Fooshufflewickbannanapants]

Bless you. It's hard but you get used to it of they're in for any length of time (3 of mine were really prem..27/28 and 29 weeks and 1 was a 34 weeker at 5lb) if there are no underlying health problems it may be that he's only there for a few days until feeding is sorted. My 34 weeker was in 5 days as she was a little jaundiced but otherwise fine. I expressed while I was at nicu and scbu and also set the alarm for 3 in the morning. It does take a while for milk to come in so don't worry. That colostrum is liquid gold. Do what you can keep hydrated, look after yourself as it's important for when he comes home. Congratulations and good luck!

[LadyOrangutan]

Congratulations on the arrival of your son.
My DS1 arrived at 35 + 3 and was 6lbs so your son is a brilliant weight. DS was in NICU on a c-pap and then SCBU to make sure he was stable when he came off that and to establish if there were any further problems.
He is now a boisterous healthy 2 year old.
I hope your DS will recover and get stable soon. I can absolutely understand how hard it will be to go home without him, poor you.
Hopefully he will be joining you at home soon.

Have they indicated how long he may be in SCBU?

[JellyBaby26]

Mine spent 2 weeks there when she was born, as did we. The one night we went home was horrible. I felt so guilty and couldn't even look at her room or any of the things we had for her (slightly different scenario to you, we were told she wouldn't come home). Being there was traumatic for us, a poor thing passed away on the ward one night but we couldn't leave. Heaven knows what we would have done if she had stayed any longer...I suppose I would have stayed there while DH went back to work.

like pp I had to set alarms through the night to express and felt like a dairy cow. Your milk will come on though and you'll soon be filling up the freezers!

Glad to hear he's doing well and hope you can be home soon. Not nice for anyone to be in scbu.

[BlueRaptor]

I work in a NICU, congratulations on the birth of your baby boy! It'll be hard leaving him but you'll be okay, continue trying to express and it'll get easier every day. Good luck.

[Fionajsd]

I had my youngest at 35 weeks , we did 10 days in scbu then home. It was awful leaving but the staff are wonderful, take the time to catch up on some sleep xx

[Headofthehive55]

Mine was in five months. She was a 23 weeker. I got through it by knowing that by thinking I really should still be pregnant. My friend was pregnant at the same time, she couldn't hold her baby either as he was inside her. It was a strange experience though.

[minipie]

Congratulations! 6lb 11 is a really excellent weight, so that's great. You will hopefully be home quite quickly.

When DD was in NICU one of the nurses told me that babies sometimes 'go on holiday' (her phrase) at 35 weeks, especially boys apparently. What she meant is that they can seem like they are sleepy and not making any progress for several days but then boom, everything then progresses very quickly.

Wrt expressing, it's best to stick to hand expressing directly into syringes while you are still producing the thicker yellow colostrum - only switch to pumping once it starts getting thinner and whiter and more copious ie turning into milk. They only need tiny amounts of colostrum and it's normal for colostrum to be produced in very small amounts, so don't be discouraged. If expressing at home it can help if you look at pics of your baby or just think about him. If it looks like you'll be expressing at home for a while (hopefully not but depends how he does with latching) then look into hiring a hospital grade pump to use at home, they are much more effective and not expensive to hire.

I found it hard and slow to establish BF with DD, which is why she was in for 3 weeks (born at 34 weeks). At the time I thought it was because of all the tube feeds she was having but much later found out she was tongue tied. Lots of people do find BF a preemie very hard, some choose to switch to bottles of EBM to get them home sooner and then try to switch to BF once home.

Going home without them is hard - having said that I stayed in with Dd for the first 10 days and it sent me a bit loopy, so actually going home and keeping busy with your DD will help keep you sane. You can leave something that smells of you in DS's cot.

I remember SCBU as a real rollercoaster, it felt like DD would make progress and then go back again. I was so desperate to get her home that every setback was a real blow. Also all the medical jargon scared the hell out of me (I am terrible for googling things and scaring myself). So with hindsight I should have adopted more of a "one day at a time" mentality.

Best of luck. SCBU is stressful but thankfully for "late prems" like yours it is generally over very quickly.

[Pyjamaface]

DS was 32 weeks and was in SCBU for just over 3 weeks, C-Pap, tube fed, jaundice. I was in hospital for a week and it was incredibly difficult when it was time for me to go home. We roomed in for the last 5 days, longer than expected as DS needed transfusions to clear the jaundice and a heart murmur was discovered.

He has just turned 7 and is happy and healthy. And despite only being the size of my hand when he was born, is already pushing 5ft tall!

[BlueRaptor]

I second what minipie said, look at pictures of baby when trying to express, and ask the SCBU staff if you can have a blanket that baby has used and smells like him you can hold when expressing.

[10storeylovesong]

Congratulations! My little boy was a 27 weeker, we spent 9 weeks in SCBU. Hopefully, if there are no health complications your little boy should be coming home with you soon, I know our SCBU aim for 36/37 weeks for home. It really is difficult leaving them to go home, I just sobbed the whole way in the car home. But he is in the best place to get them the best care he needs, and one day you will look back and it will be a distant memory. My little boy is now a happy, healthy, cheeky 3 year old and we owe SCBU staff so much.

One thing I would recommend which really helped me was keeping a journal. It helped on the bad days to be able to look back and see how far we'd come, and to remember every little milestone.

Good luck!

[rahhhhhhhhhhh]

my twins were born at 30 weeks and were in scbu for 8 weeks and were just over 3lb each, it was really hard but i didnt have any children at home to consider which i suppose made it easier. mine needed help feeding as they couldnt suck, they had jaundice and needed to put on weight. one had breathing problems too for 1 day.

its been 10 years now and i look back with fond memories of visiting (as they werent poorly) at the time i wanted to introduce them to people and felt robbed of people visiting.

we visited last year and some of the nurses remembered my two, the kids enjoyed seeing where they sepnt there first 2 months

[Onthedowns]

Thank you all! They haven't said how long he will be in possibly two weeks depending on how he gets on he tried latching today and was good but I have massive breasts poor baby! I am on normal bay with babies and their mums which is hard! But nurses are brilliant! Obviously as I have 4 year old dd at home I need to try to go home too! But I hate leavin him just to go back to my ward! I am using double pump and hiring one for home just starting to come through! Hopefully I can get on ok! If he latches brilliant but like someone further up they said he is going to sleep for a week as he shouldn't be here! He's s bit windy and sicky, just below line on jaundice so monitoring him!

[Onthedowns]

He's trying to latch on making a real effort! Just so sleepy too!!!

[thismumismad]

My 2ins were born at 34 weeks 5lb 1 and 5lb 6. They were in special care for 7 days then moved on to another ward for 3 more days. I had an electric pump to at first then I tried the avent isis. The isis was absolutely better than the boots electric one. When they were 3 months old after a day out I managed to pump over 20 ounces when I can home to find mum had just fed them. Eat soup, quick to heat and eat and drink lots.

[GiddyOnZackHunt]

Unless there's a problem then I think that once they start feeding and gaining any weight they can go home. My DS was 35 weeks when I took him home and is just fine at school :) I couldn't express so I went with mixed feeding to get him home.Ask if they have any facility where you aren't on a ward with mums and babies. I was given a side room so they could let me sleep between feeds. When you get into SCBU they get very focused on volumes of milk which can be very difficult for women who choose to bf. I was pressured to ff but refused. I actually got warned against bf! I bf him until 2!

[slicedfinger]

DD1 was 34 weeks and 4lb14. She was in scbu for two days then on the ward with me another two then home. They just wanted to check the possible jaundice didn't come to anything and that she could feed ok and had done a poo. She is 16 now.

Congratulations! I hope you are all at home together soon.

[Onthedowns]

Thank you no pressure to feed st moment more to keep up with expressing boobs starting to hurt so hopefully working. I may take a different view to get him home if latching doesn't work! It's hard to know what to do! They are giving him large volumes of formula and he is bit sicky the nurses even think to much but based on weight! It's bit off as when he comes home he will probably reduce little and often !!!

[minipie]

Oh that's what happened to us, they kept trying to give DD large feeds 4 hours apart and of course she sicked it all up as that's not normal for a full term newborn never mind a prem. God knows why they do it. Anyway they switched to smaller feeds every 2 hours and she was much better (then went onto 3 hourly a few days later). Maybe suggest that?

[absolutelynotfabulous]

Mine was 29 weeks and 2lb 6oz but I have to say I really enjoyed my scbu experience! I've never been in hospital before, I didn't have any others at home, I was kept in for the first 10 days anyway (emergency CSection). Once I was discharged, I visited every day (on the bus) and once dd was big enough to come out of her incubator I'd take a book and read whilst she lay on a pillow with me. The one thing that freaked me out was the sound of the machines going off. My heart still misses a beat now if I hear that sound, 14 years on.

The staff were brilliant and caring and I knew dd was in good hands. She was there 8 weeks, I think

[Banana82]

Congratulations on the birth of your little boy!

My DS was worn at 34 weeks at 5lbs 5oz and was in neonatal for 3 weeks. He too was tube fed and very sleepy. I stayed in hospital for 6 days as I was holding on to the thought of us leaving the hospital together. I didn't want to walk out the hospital and into the car without him. In the end I gave in. I was also on a ward surrounded by new mums and their babies which made me feel worse and I was desperate for a little sleep by this point.

Its so so hard to leave them. I cried the minute I left his cot til we got home pretty much. Felt like I was abandoning him. You have your DD at home though and I think that distraction will definitely help. Not sure if its possible for you but I spent all day with him in neonatal after I was discharged. I wanted to do all feeds (even if it was just putting it down the tube) all nappy changes, all clothes changes, bedding changes, the lot. It helped me to do those things. Your husband going back to work is a great idea. By the time we left, mine had used up all his paternity and holiday and it would have been nice for him to have been at home with us once DS was discharged.

Take care of yourself.

[seaweed123]

I had to go home and leave DC in NICU then HD, as there were no facilities to stay at the hospital. I live an hour away, and it felt awful. Expressing every 3 hours was really difficult too.

I'd say if your DH can take the time off now then he should. You will need support. I was lucky that DH's work gave him an extra week of paid paternity, due to the fact we'd spent a couple of weeks in hospital.

My tips would be

• if you are on medication, get someone else to be in charge of making you take it at the right time. Otherwise by the time the pain catches up and reminds you it will take ages to kick in again.
  
• take lots of snacks to the hospital. I'd go all day without eating, as I'd think "i'll just get food when i go out to express". Then I'd express, take the milk into the ward to the fridge, and see DC. And I'd think "oh, I'll just sit there a second". And before I knew it it was nearly time to express again. Everyone would say to make sure I was taking the time to eat, and I'd just think "fuck off". But at the very least, have something while you express.
  
• Make sure you keep asking to be allowed to hold him. The nurses are so busy, they won't offer, IMO, unless you ask.
  
• Don't worry about phoning the ward from home as much as you want.