Long history with my mum that I have posted about recently - but basically she lives in France and wants to come back to UK to live permanently.
She is leaving her husband, and already did a bit of a midnight flit 6 weeks ago - all pre planned, he is a total shit (more about that later). The flit was planned months in advance and I knew from the beginning about it.
Now, I have a flat that I used to live in but now rent out to a tenant. My tenant is good, pays on time, keeps the house in perfect order etc, is a dream tenant (which I know from experience can be hard to find). However in order to help my mum out (who would be returning with a dog & jobless, so would find it hard to find a rental) I said she could move into my flat.
I gave my tenant 3 months notice and was honest about my mum's plans, he understood and looked elsewhere.
Mum returned a month before tenant was due to move out. DH, DD and I took her for a meal the first night she was back and I overheard her tell my DH she didn't want to move in to my flat anymore.
The next day I confronted her and she said she didn't know wether she should move in to my flat or not - said it was very small and she wanted to return to France to sell her house. I asked her to let me know within the next day (as I'd have the pain of finding a new tenant). The next day she text me to say she wasn't going to be moving in.
I phoned my tenant straight away, apologised and said before I put it on the rental market, would he like to stay? He'd just heard his next house had flooded so it was perfect timing for him, and he agreed to stay put.
5 minutes later, mum called and said she'd changed her mind, she'd have the flat afterall. I said sorry, I've just told my tenant he can stay, and I'm not calling him back to reneg. She actually bollocked me for asking him too soon after her text
She went back to France, back to twat husband, where she is apparently saving more money and selling the house to get money that way too.
That was 6 weeks ago, and in that 6 week period she's been looking online at houses that allow pets and I've been going round viewing them for her. Because she doesn't have a job she'd need to pay 6 months upfront (which she can afford with what she's saved, but she doesn't really want to). Some places want a double deposit because she has a dog.
Spoke to her today and she's stressed about the house hunting. She asked me if I would give my tenant notice again so she can move into my flat round about May. She said her biggest mistake was "having a wobble" about moving in. I said that I can't do that to him after messing him about already and she said "not even for your desperate mum so I don't have to pay 6 months upfront?".
AIBU to have said no? She's in a mood with me again. I know it's my mum but she chose not to move in after saying she would so she only has herself to blame.
So, back to her husband - so as not to drip feed I thought the easiest way to show what a twat he is is to link to my recent thread about him (trigger warning: sexual abuse) - it's not necessarily relevant to the situation (so don't feel obliged to read it!) but I didn't want to drip feed in any way. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/a2573950-Would-you-stay-with-your-partner-if-he-was-a-bit-letchy-to-your-teenage-DD
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AIBU?
To not let my mum live in my flat?
65 replies
BaBaBaBoom · 01/03/2016 21:12
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