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AIBU to wonder how close Mums Netters are to the 'gender norm' ?

(79 Posts)
Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:20:05

Do you conform to the western 'gender norm' for women? I can do maths, have short hair, never wear a dress and like cars. I am however a Mother and love make up and shopping. I am pretty average among my friends and just cannot connect with the idea that anything apart from my biological woman bits makes me a woman. How do you measure up and is their anything that makes you a woman apart from your biology ?

araiba Mon 29-Feb-16 10:22:41

I have a big bag of popcorn ready for this thread

PirateSmile Mon 29-Feb-16 10:24:54

I am pretty similar to you. Short hair, always in jeans but I love make up. In terms of personality, I have no problem with conflict, I like politics and current affairs. Sadly, the latter often marks me out as different to a lot of women I know.

MrsJayy Mon 29-Feb-16 10:26:05

What is the western gender norm ? Just so i can answer

redshoeblueshoe Mon 29-Feb-16 10:26:24

araiba - me too

SovietKitsch Mon 29-Feb-16 10:29:04

Like MrsJayy I have no idea what this western woman template of which you speak actually is, so can't say whether I fit it or not...I think preferences based on sex are bollocks though, so tend to ignore such things

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:29:08

MrsJayy your own understanding or not knowing or whatever is enough - the fact that it isn't really fixed and is mutable is possibly what makes it such a shit thing to define people by ?

ComeonSummer1 Mon 29-Feb-16 10:29:17

i found myself alone on Monday night! No dh or kids.

I picked out a DVD and realised I had no idea how to load it, what channel to turn to and had to call my dd. She warbled on about HDMI cables and I sadly realised I am lazy and allow my dh and kids to do s the technical stuff. grin

PirateSmile Mon 29-Feb-16 10:33:44

A western woman template is a really interesting idea. Obviously, people will argue about but I'd say have a look at the actresses at the Oscars. They look like clones of one another.

MrsJayy Mon 29-Feb-16 10:34:55

Well you didnt really answer my question what do you mean by the western norm ?

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:35:55

Pirate - most of the men I know are considerably less interested in politics and discussion than me smile

MrsJayy Mon 29-Feb-16 10:36:55

But they are actesses on a glam night out they are all going to look glam

PirateSmile Mon 29-Feb-16 10:39:22

I know that MrsJayy but I'm referring to things like their hair, their body shape, the choices they make with their clothes. They look like clones to me. Anybody who looks different to this is slated by the media.

Katenka Mon 29-Feb-16 10:40:29

I am me. I just do what I think is best for me when coming to my appearance or likes/dislikes.

RudeElf Mon 29-Feb-16 10:42:12

The gender norm according to who?

tkndnv Mon 29-Feb-16 10:44:19

I like wearing make up. I like looking after my baby niece (no kids of my own, do not want any), I also cry when I hurt myself/am upset and am rubbish at DIY/parking.

However, I ride downhill mountain bikes (used to do it semi-professionally when younger), do not like cooking or housework and loathe crafts.

Make of that you willl. I am person before I am a woman, if that makes sense.

TwoLeftSocks Mon 29-Feb-16 10:44:26

I'm just me, I happen to be female living in a western country.

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:44:53

Rudelf - exactly smile

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:46:03

Oh dear lots of us are just people and don't know what the gender norm is supposed to be - I'm so surprised

TwoLeftSocks Mon 29-Feb-16 10:50:06

Are you trying to be sarcastic? Hard to tell.

BunnyTyler Mon 29-Feb-16 10:51:54

I know what you mean.

I never wear a dress, am always in jeans and a jumper/hoody but put a nice top in for going out.
I wear heels, but am just as often in boots or trainers, I wear make up every day and have bobbed hair.
Am interested in a wide range of topics, am very good at maths and worked for 20 yrs as an engineer, usually one of only a couple of women and always covered in dirt and grease in a pair of overalls.
Had regular manicures and facials throughout that time too.

I am me, the only thing that defines male or female / man or woman about me is my biological sex.
Do I live or present as a 'woman', yes - because I am. I am me - an adult biological female.

RudeElf Mon 29-Feb-16 10:52:18

What is your fucking question??

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:52:47

Twosocks - yes sarcastic - sorry if its hard to tell smile

Mellowautumn Mon 29-Feb-16 10:54:52

My whole point is gender is as social construct that changes over time and from culture to culture - its not a fixed biological feature.

RudeElf Mon 29-Feb-16 10:59:19

You might as well have asked "is your favourite colour the same as someone else's favourite colour?"

You havent definied who someone else is or what they say their favourite colour is. What answers are you expecting?

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