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To think my sister is

(52 Posts)
fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 11:55:25

A complete twat ?

She's so rude when it comes to my 14 week old daughter. Today for example she referred to her as evil. She says she is joking but it is not funny. She has also called her satan before hmm

She is the least maternal person, and we have never really gotten on, but there is no need for her to be such a rude twat !

PaulAnkaTheDog Thu 25-Feb-16 11:58:37

So she's joking? I think you're being a bit unreasonable. My dsis used to call ds a 'demon child' because of his awful crying when he was little. It was a joke. She loves him. I think calling her a twat is pretty nasty as well tbh.

ZiggyFartdust Thu 25-Feb-16 12:00:44

She's joking, lighten up. Or don't see her, since you clearly can't stand her?

wigglesrock Thu 25-Feb-16 12:03:44

Really, I call my own children Satan sometimes, often one of them is referred to as the devil child, not one in particular, each of them has worn the name with pride. If you don't get on with your sister you don't get on with her - happens to us all. But you know unless she's actually booking an exorcism for your daughter I wouldn't overthink her turn of phrase.

PaulAnkaTheDog Thu 25-Feb-16 12:06:07

Incidentally, dsis still calls him demon child, spawn of Satan, fart monster when he's mischievous or farting. He giggles and loves her. It's a joke.

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:07:36

She's seen her twice... A little unfair to brand her as evil ? Perhaps I've become over sensitive. I think if she said theses things with less grimace on her face I could take it more light heartedly.

PurpleDaisies Thu 25-Feb-16 12:09:20

That's a very odd thing to say about a baby. How is she normally? Any issues with having her own kids? Some people really aren't baby people but if you find what she says upsetting just ask her to stop.

Paintedhandprints Thu 25-Feb-16 12:14:15

Did you challenge her on it? I find it a bit of an odd thing to call a newborn. In fact, I would be offended too. You have no obligation to spend time with your sister either.

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:15:40

purple she has none of her own, and has no desire. However, she knows that dd was quite poorly in the early days and how it affected me emotionally. I just think she's being a bit insensitive with her attitude towards dd.

PurpleDaisies Thu 25-Feb-16 12:16:29

Have you raised it with her at all?

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:17:31

Yes- when challenged she said she was joking. Quite right on the no obligation so I think that will be the last of it. She invited her self over today so I could sort her bills out for her, so not even like she wanted to spend time with us both.

WorraLiberty Thu 25-Feb-16 12:17:35

I'm not sure if she's being insensitive or if you're being over sensitive OP.

Lots of people say that sort of thing about babies, but of course it's light hearted.

ILikeUranus Thu 25-Feb-16 12:18:20

WTF? YANBU, she's a complete twat.

PurpleDaisies Thu 25-Feb-16 12:18:46

I quite often threaten to put my sister's children in the bin but it's a fun game for everyone-maybe your sister it's totally oblivious?

Don't totally rule out her wanting kids of her own but not being able to (either lack of partner or gynae issues). Common defence mechanism is to pretend you don't like kids.

scarednoob Thu 25-Feb-16 12:19:42

It's all about context - my friend told me to "shut up about my sodding minge demon" - but he was clearly joking as he adores the baby and refers to his own kids in similar loving terms.

In your case it sounds symptomatic of deeper issues in which case YANBU - but you perhaps need to talk to her or cool the contact as you see fit

FellOutOfBedTwice Thu 25-Feb-16 12:22:40

This sounds like my SIL who is very jealous of my daughter. She comes from a family of boys- children, uncles and grandchildren- and was the only girl until DD was born. It doesn't get better I'm afraid, all you can do is ignore it. It's pretty pathetic to watch a 30 year old woman compete for attention with her 2 year old neice and say things to her Dad like "stop paying her so much attention Dad, I'M your princess" hmm And yes, she is a twat, YANBU.

Feeches Thu 25-Feb-16 12:23:04

I've called my own dc satan at times. I wouldn't refer to anybody else's as that though. Not to their face anyway.

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:23:49

I probably am being some what over sensitive - but I think this is understandable when sleep deprivation is rife.

She 100% does not want children, never has done and is very open about it. She has been quite jealous since Dd arrived as our mum has not spent as much time with her due to helping me out. I just don't think she needs to be rude sad

PaulAnkaTheDog Thu 25-Feb-16 12:25:42

But she's not meaning to be rude, she's joking! It's you who is taking it in a rude way, it's not her intention.

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:25:47

fell you've hit the nail on the head there, because my sister acts the exact same way ! Today she had to have mum confirm that she was the favourite.

CooPie10 Thu 25-Feb-16 12:26:10

Well I don't think it's a nice way to speak about a child. Anyway we don't really speak like that in my family so it would upset me.

fuzzyllama Thu 25-Feb-16 12:29:11

paul I have to disagree, she is being rude. Yes, calling her a twat is rude also, but not as rude as naming an child she barely knows evil, regardless of when quizzed about it saying she is joking.

shovetheholly Thu 25-Feb-16 12:32:27

"She has been quite jealous since Dd arrived as our mum has not spent as much time with her"

I suspect that may be the problem, right there. It's early days and maybe she's adjusting to losing out as a result of your daughter coming along. If that's the case, it might calm down as she gets more used to the new arrangements.

PaulAnkaTheDog Thu 25-Feb-16 12:33:03

There is a difference: you're being mean, she's not. Have you even told her you don't like it? It's pretty unfair to complain about someone doing something (that's quite normal) if you haven't even asked them not to.

AliceInUnderpants Thu 25-Feb-16 12:33:24

What was the context?

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